Today, my skydiving instructor casually remarked that he wouldn't mind "diving into" me sometime. He was strapped to my back the whole way down. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Today, I tried skydiving for the first time. The professional I was attached to had a boner the whole way down. FML
Not cut out for this
Today, I took my girlfriend skydiving for her birthday. I insisted on joining her to make it a memory for us both, despite my fear of heights. I passed out twice mid-freefall and had to be saved by the instructor both times. FML
Today, my friend took me tandem skydiving. When it was time to jump, he began crying, said he'd cut our parachute cords, then said "Goodbye, cruel world!" and pushed me off the plane with him strapped to my back. I pissed myself and cried like a bitch. He thinks his "prank" was hilarious. FML
Today, I went on my first ever assisted skydive. I fainted after we jumped, and only came to as we touched the ground. FML
Conversational skills
Today, I went on a date with this girl I met online. The conversation drifted and we were talking about how we'd prefer to die, if we had a choice. I said, "I want to skydive over the ocean without a parachute." She said she wants to be made into a wallet. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were out cliff jumping, when for the first time, he told me he loved me. I panicked and pushed him over the edge and into the water. He's now in hospital. FML
Today, I dove into the water perfectly, and my bikini bottoms came off. I splashed around nervously. This guy must have thought I was drowning, and dove in to save me. He emerged from the water carrying a half naked girl. FML
Today, at the public pool, my boyfriend dived from one side to the other. I jumped in to reward him underwater, kissing him everywhere and grabbing his crotch, until I noticed his shorts were different. I surfaced to see that my boyfriend was still far away. FML
Superfuzz Big Muff
Today, as my boyfriend was about to go down on me, he held his breath and said, "I'm going in!" FML
Today, I went scuba diving for the first time. The diver took me down some 3 meters and I started showing the thumbs up. He thought I was excited. My breather wasn't working and I was using the sign he told me to use to go up. FML
Top comments
buckdharma 37
Did you yank the right cord?
lilhellian 26
Don't worry that's just turbulence.. Giggity...
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Comments (100)
maddygirl820 10
Clever
Kendrama94 3
well was he attractive?
ProjectN69 12
Did you feel anything poking you on the way down? Haha.
egc573 40
What a creep. He totally timed that comment--of COURSE he says that when it would be most uncomfortable for you to hear it. I hope you turn the tables on him by reporting it. Going skydiving is a dream of mine and I would hate for that to ruin the experience.
Brett41 10
Don't overreact. If a measly pickup line is enough to ruin anyones experience of something, then you're taking it too seriously.
melkymac101 17
Well at least someone wants to do u
candy4567 3
If he's hot and not old who cares
carminecris89 13
Damn girl! You must be fine. I would take it as a compliment, however unprofessional it may have been.
hannaaaahr 33
So I should take it as a compliment when random strangers tell me they want to sleep with me? Well, I'll just go outside in my sluttyest clothes and see who will bang me so I can feel more confident!
FlyingMonkey228 5
The instructors usually do tandem for opportunity to dive themselves as it's expensive otherwise and it increases their number of jumps. If the guy said it, log a complaint. It's a relatively small community. I'm surprised you could hear a thing once the door opened on the plane though.
benmec 18
That's actually one thing on my bucket list. Tell him you wanna make it happen. Go back and make it a reality!!! :)
cartedor 18
Bet you he said it to very lady