Intimacy: Today, my roommate told me that unscented deodorant prevents...

By AllieOops - 17/08/2011 09:14 - United States

Today, my roommate told me that unscented deodorant prevents ingrown hairs on the bikini line. She shared this beauty tip with me when I caught her using my Lady Speed Stick on her snatch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 435

You deserved it 3 010

Intimacy

The smell detective is on the case

Bouncing off the walls

Guilt

By FarisH - 31/05/2010 09:15 - Jordan

Today, I went to my orthodontist where I was informed that I'll going to the prom, to my brother's wedding, and maybe to university with braces in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 037

You deserved it 9 456

By Anonymous - 12/03/2010 03:46 - United States

Today, I went to get my first tattoo. When I told the man that I wanted Tinkerbell on my lower back area. He snorted and told me that I was way too old to have Tinkerbell on me, and that Disney characters are only cute on people 35 and younger. I'm 23. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 075

You deserved it 13 430

My electric toothbrush

By Anonymous - 27/11/2019 18:00 - United States

Today, I heard my sister masturbating in her room. I took the dog around the block to get out of the house, and I came back to see her leaving her room. She had my electric toothbrush in her hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 541

You deserved it 280

Criminal Minds

By Anonymous - 18/09/2019 00:01 - United States

Today, I had to go to the ER because of a terrible allergic reaction I had to the cookies my "friend" made for me. She assured me several times that there were no nuts in them. Turns out, she put nuts in them on purpose, to see whether or not I was really allergic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 555

You deserved it 113

By Sad - 01/03/2009 09:08 - United States

Today, I was typing up a love letter on my computer. A sexual love letter. I was in a classroom, I'm the teacher, I'm gay, and my love letter showed up on the tv screen while my 7th grade students were taking a test. It was up on the screen for 15 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 182

You deserved it 309 396

By Anonymous - 02/07/2009 04:13 - United States

Today, I had a consultation for an upcoming surgery I need done. The doctor (very handsome and in his late twenties) asked me to flex my stomach and act like I was trying to use the bathroom. As I was enjoying him touching my stomach, I fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 931

You deserved it 8 610

By Distraught - 01/03/2011 21:08 - Reserved

Today, the day before I was going to move in with my army fiancé, he was told he would be deployed very soon. I can't pay for the apartment without him, and now have to move back in with my parents until he returns from active duty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 001

You deserved it 6 630

By myennechee - 18/03/2009 05:22 - Germany

Today, I asked my boyfriend while he was eating potato chips if he wanted to eat me. He looked at the potato chips, he looked at me and said "Unless your vagina turns into a potato chip, I'd rather eat these." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 113

You deserved it 91 808

By Anonymous - 06/07/2010 06:11 - United States

Today, I held the door open for an old man in a motorized wheelchair. He missed the door, hit my foot, and called me an asshole for getting in his way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 233

You deserved it 4 416

WTF people?!

By Anonymous - 26/04/2020 08:00

Today, as an essential worker, some lady tore me a new one because we were out of large sanitizer bottles. Our doors opened at 9 a.m. and she didn't show up until 2 p.m. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 596

You deserved it 103

By panther of the desert - 02/05/2012 21:58 - Puerto Rico - Rio Grande

Today, I was to have an important phone interview for a job. I got a call and everything went perfectly, and they said I was hired. Later, I found out that one of my "friends" had gotten one of his buddies to prank call me and make sure the line was engaged when the real interviewer called. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 059

You deserved it 2 181

By Allie - 03/06/2010 18:58 - United States

Today, I was texting my crush. I tried to say, "I need a nap," but my iPhone changed it to "I need anal." I sent it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 951

You deserved it 26 432

By mitochondriaisthepowerhouseofthecell - 27/12/2018 02:00

Today, I had my final piano performance. There is a guy in my class who constantly tells me I suck at piano, so I was looking forward to watching him play badly since he never practices. Instead, he played the most beautiful music that would make Mozart weep. He got a standing ovation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 549

You deserved it 696

By Anonymous - 11/06/2013 15:20 - United States - Seattle

Today, I was meeting my boyfriend's family for the first time. The minute I stepped in the door his mother hit me in the face and kicked me out because I was "the slut her husband cheated on her with." My older sister and I look much alike. Too much alike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 698

You deserved it 4 656

By Anonymous - 20/04/2009 01:40 - United States

Today, it was pouring rain outside, I had 2 textbooks in my hands. I took a shortcut, and instead of running around the small pole that directed the line at the cafe, I decided to jump over it. In front of a group of guys, my foot got caught and I face planted with my books flying everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 346

You deserved it 47 779

By Anonymous - 29/04/2016 17:59 - United States

Today, some guy on a bike kept taunting me about my weight while I was out jogging. He ended up hitting a street lamp and fell off his bike. I had a real good laugh at him for all of 5 seconds before he got mad and really made me run. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 066

You deserved it 2 242

By Cornbreesha - 28/11/2009 07:13 - United States

Today, a mall cop tore up my 'Free hugs' sign. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 891

You deserved it 17 276

Almost there

By Anonymous - 20/06/2020 05:05

Today, I paid 100$ for a trash service to pick up my broken couch. Minutes later, I got an email from someone finally replying to my ad for a free couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 401

You deserved it 171

By Anonymous - 30/10/2011 08:38 - United States

Today, while in the grocery store my boyfriend said very loudly "Don't make me hit you in public again!" He says things like this every time we are in the grocery store line. The sad part is that it's better than when he says "Are you gonna pay for the stuff you put in your purse?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 688

You deserved it 9 660

By ApparentlyaPotato - 10/02/2016 05:08 - United States - Coeur D Alene

Today, I was called a "Potato" for at least the 30th time by people online for living in Idaho. I've lived here my whole life, I have yet to see a potato farm. None of these people has even left the East Coast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 487

You deserved it 2 201

Dumbass friends

By georgehentson - 04/08/2021 20:01

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to post a sign at the deep end of the public swimming pool, saying, "This end topless only." When someone complained, he said that I did it, and I got banned from the pool for life. And fired, too - I was the lifeguard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 022

You deserved it 106

By Charley - 25/11/2016 10:44

Today, I was teaching a new student their first ever piano lesson, hoping that they would sign up for more lessons. Thirty minutes had gone by and after the 5th time of me saying what a talented, sweet little girl she was, the mother told me it was in fact a boy. They didn't sign up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 827

You deserved it 3 029

Tense

By Anon - 06/04/2021 07:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my doctor told me if my blood pressure gets any higher, he could use me to reinflate the air in his tyres. FML

I agree, your life sucks 795

You deserved it 119

By Anonymous - 10/04/2013 09:06 - United States

Today, I was riding a new horse when a lawnmower starting up spooked her. She jumped straight up in the air and I landed directly on the saddle horn. I can't walk or feel anything between my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 935

You deserved it 4 200

Hiding from the drama

By Tiff8any - 14/07/2021 21:59

Today, my boyfriend asked me to untag him in our vacation photos together. Last month, he hid his relationship status and hid every trace of me. He says it’s because he doesn’t want any "social media drama" and people knowing about his "personal life." We’ve been together for 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 419

You deserved it 204

By Anonymous - 17/10/2009 04:27 - United States

Today, my landlady decided to fix the leak in my room. Her solution was repainting the ceiling. Now not only is my room still wet but it now reeks of paint thinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 582

You deserved it 1 977

Not mine

By alerra - 20/01/2020 14:00 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, my roommate's parents came over to our one room apartment. They found condom wrappers. My roommate tried to say they were mine. I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 256

You deserved it 234

By teea - 15/11/2012 23:34 - Australia - Saint Lucia

Today, my boyfriend and I cleaned his parents' whole house while they were out, just to be nice. When they came home, they assumed we only did it because we'd made some huge mess that we needed to hide. I'm now banned from their house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 396

You deserved it 2 554

Believe her next time

By KICKxASSxNINJA - 26/09/2020 08:02 - United States - Fresno

Today, my mother bolted into my room and let out a huge fart that smelled like rotten meat because she wanted to prove a point, that she had been having intestinal problems for three days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 968

You deserved it 156

By Anonymous - 11/05/2009 06:21 - United States

Today, I called my mom while she was out of town and confessed how I have been depressed lately and thinking suicidal thoughts. After my long sob story, she took a breath and said, "OK, just make sure you don't forget to take the dogs out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 630

You deserved it 5 673

By Venus - 13/03/2014 22:28 - United States - La Crescenta

Today, upon being asked to name all the planets, I had to sing along to a Lady Gaga song in my head to remember them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 190

You deserved it 12 505

By pot, meet kettle - 05/04/2013 23:21 - United States - Saint Cloud

Today, I was chatting online with a guy I really like, when he used the word "irregardless." I couldn't help but mention how little sense it makes, since it's a combination of two words meaning roughly the same thing. He replied, "lol what? your stupid." Jesus Christ. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 901

You deserved it 9 776

By Anonymous - 07/08/2015 17:31 - United States - Newark

Today, the jackoffs at my new job kept making jokes about my prosthetic leg. When I finally lost my shit and told one of them to back off, he said "Woah there, Mr Pistorius!" then said he'll avoid using the restroom now in case I decide to shoot him through the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 959

You deserved it 1 878

By helloimkylieee - 25/01/2016 01:04 - United States - Tracy

Today, I had to convince my parents to shut the door when they have sex. They have done this on multiple occasions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 639

You deserved it 1 540

By awwshit - 13/10/2009 14:13 - Canada

Today, I told the man I've been in love with for 3 years, who also happens to be my boss, how I felt. He responds by filing sexual harassment charges against me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 718

You deserved it 34 947

By Anonymous - 28/09/2012 14:25 - United States - Lawndale

Today, I found out why my teenage daughter won't brush her teeth properly. Apparently my son convinced her that toothpaste has tons of calories. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 549

You deserved it 2 641

By MexyBoy - 11/06/2019 16:08

Today, I wanted to do something nice for my mom. So, while she was sleeping, I cleaned the whole house for her and even made her breakfast. A few minutes later, she came downstairs and yelled at me to keep it down because she was trying to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 810

You deserved it 275

By Anonymous - 19/12/2010 09:17 - New Zealand

Today, I fell over on the bus. X-Rays revealed not only that I have been growing extra bones in my foot, but that when I fell, I crushed all of them. Doctors don't know how to fix bones that aren't supposed to be there, so they're just going to cut them out. Two days before Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 076

You deserved it 2 707

By Lickmebaby - 12/02/2017 11:00 - United Kingdom - Enfield

Today, I woke up to see my 8-year-old cousin licking my hand. All of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 686

You deserved it 498

By ouchieouch - 07/01/2011 18:14 - United States

Today, I burned myself while cooking, so I asked my mom to get the burn cream while I waited in the kitchen. While I was waiting, I absentmindedly set my hand on the hot stove, earning myself a second burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 351

You deserved it 42 745

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Top comments

OliviaMaris13 0

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 15:54

...not unscented anymore...

mashamanya 0

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 15:52

is it true? that it prevents ingrowns?

ckr911 5

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 15:51

Yummy.

EvilPotato 14

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:02

that's hot.

flockz 19

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:09

she's lying!! she just copied her idea from me! *scratches sweaty crotch*

LiveLaughFML 10

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:19

WHAT IF you never caught her using your deodorant on her "snatch" and you regulary continued using your deodorant? at least you caught her in action. literally.

eminemchick 19

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:21

on the bright side, now you can prevent ingrown hairs!:) your life sucks. fyl.

YacL 15

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:23

22- Couldn't of been THAT bad if she didn't notice, unless this is the first time her roommate tried this little experiment, then I'd have to agree with you.

juicedboi 7

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:25

Never understood why people prefer sticks to sprays. Please feel free to tell me

LiveLaughFML 10

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:27

#29 yeah i understand what you're saying :) but i wouldn't care if it was the first or last time. i wouldn't like anyone using my deodorant on their sweaty crotch to "prevent ingrown hairs" :P but that's just me, lol!

Mean_Mr_Mustard 9

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:31

Op, cooter kick the bitch.

iamyourmum 1

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:48

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

1greatsk8er 0

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:54

48 - it can still prevent sweating and the smell of sweat.

DoWhatsRight 1

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:55

That's totally..... normal....

james_aka_frosty 3

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 17:50

41 if it prevents sweat it's an antiperspirant

knightsfb 0

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 18:05

31 because spray just covers up the smell, but sticks actually eliminate the odor

ariomario2 0

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 18:36

Use hers then... And make sure she's watching.

mgsoloist 14

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 18:42

31-to me the sprays feel really waxy and gross. Like we use it in drumline to prevent our sticks from slipping cuz it's that waxy. Sticks are smooth.

StoryOfTheYear 13

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 19:01

Wow, I gotta try this! (waits for troll)

starsfan_9 7

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 20:58

Wow, I have no idea, must be magic and HEY! That magic must also prevent ingrown hairs!

Friaza 29

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 23:21

Just wait till you find out what she does with your toothbrush!

iluvboobies 9

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 23:54

Well, now it's not so unscented anymore, is it? Something about that deodorant is fishy!

iluvboobies 9

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 23:56

78 Damn, you beat me to it! :)

JustHello123 1

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Thursday 18 August 2011 1:51

Ew thats so not true!

Prankster7o7 5

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Thursday 18 August 2011 4:58

94, could you do that with a guitar pick?

sandyandellie 5

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Thursday 18 August 2011 5:59

78- jesus are you trying to make make me gag????

gogreen8856 0

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Thursday 18 August 2011 6:15

that is disgusting!!

WinryElric 0

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Sunday 21 August 2011 2:53

29- I loveee ur profile pic

Runninvegan 8

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 15:51

That's hot,

eminemchick 19

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:26

did you go " but now it smells like fishy fishy fishy!" ?

i_l_y143 0

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 17:02

hahaahaha! ftw.

coltonp90x 2

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 18:48

Oh I agree! I don't understand why you have lots of negative votes, I voted you up!:)

Runninvegan 8

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 19:11

Haha thanks I thought it was pretty funny XD

coltonp90x 2

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 21:34

So did I!:D some people just don't have a sense of humor these days

bizarre_ftw 21

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Friday 26 August 2011 18:12

True. Then again now a days the humor has lost all semblance of sense :/ just a thought to ponder :)

mashamanya 0

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 15:52

is it true? that it prevents ingrowns?

crazychick1269 7

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 17:29

look it up!! haha

mgsoloist 14

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 18:44

I doubt it. I just think her friend didn't want a fishy smelling snatch and didn't want to use her own deodorant.

jadenstigman 0

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 18:46

Why Don't you try it and get back to the FML community on the results

Nooneslooking 0

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 20:30

Just looked up people, some people say it works on Google, not too many, but there IS an Ingrown Hair Serum that they sell that apparently works really well.

emmanizzer 6

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Thursday 18 August 2011 0:07

I've actually heard that uou're not supposed to put deodorants on after shaving because it can irritate it even more. Unscented lotions work best. Or baby oil.

Xx_Dakota_xX 1

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Thursday 18 August 2011 5:09

Who says snatch these days...

dubstepp 15

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Friday 19 August 2011 9:14

Actually if u have bad razor burn using roll on deodorant makes it feels better. I've seen my mom use it and she said it made it cool off basically.

whirlednews 8

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Friday 19 August 2011 19:59

You saw your mom put deodorant on her snatch?

bizarre_ftw 21

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Friday 26 August 2011 18:06

158 - the Brits 181 - well she's a girl so I'm guessing: yeah, probably

buckstop1 37

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Sunday 3 April 2016 0:00

Yes actually, it does. It works for me at least. A friend of mine told me the same thing. I was skeptical too, I thought she was just fucking with me until I actually tried it haha.

beach_bound_ 5

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Thursday 12 May 2016 7:06

Yup, it works. I have two different deodorants, I shave at night, put a thick layer of it on, sleep that way, wash it of in the morning and no razor burn, no red blotches and no ingrown hairs.

DFlit1 0

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 15:52

Lol best coverup lie ever!

prince122 0

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Thursday 18 August 2011 7:29

or perhaps she just shoves it up something else? if you know what I'm saying.

bizarre_ftw 21

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Friday 26 August 2011 18:10

117 - yeah I hate that too!!!! >< 163 - Grape Juice

zaveeshaveesh3 7

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 15:53

To learn something new everyday

OliviaMaris13 0

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 15:54

...not unscented anymore...

No_habla_espanol 11

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:01

Lol! That is funny and really disgusting!

eminemchick 19

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:23

well 6 the face ur making, uve found some really gross smelling unscented deodorant

koe4 0

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 17:05

28 - or attract various insects

zaveeshaveesh3 7

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 15:55

You learn something new everyday!

IAmNotAnAnimal 9

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 15:56

Old spice's new scent: Fish market.

No_habla_espanol 11

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:02

Ahhhhhh, nasty!

zaveeshaveesh3 7

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:14

Indeed nasty.

neonblue120 6

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 16:15

Look down -- your vagina -- a stinking, rotting, cesspool look back up -- my face curled in agony and disgust -- Get that shit right look down again troll face.

flockz 19

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Wednesday 17 August 2011 17:34

look at your vagina, now back to me. this situation is grim, can you tell by the stench? but if you were to use old spice, you would never be insecure about your vagina again. now back to me. im riding a fish, because it smells like you.