Miscellaneous: Today, my roomie had guests over. I didn't feel like socializing,...

By crankg - 21/10/2011 04:57 - United States

Today, my roomie had guests over. I didn't feel like socializing, but I really had to piss. So I pissed in the plant in my room, spilled half of it, mopped it up with an old shirt, and went to bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 560

You deserved it 55 351

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Same thing different taste

Completely wet

By Anonymous - 27/02/2020 20:00

Today, I was drinking too much and I have to pee constantly, so I went to bed without my girlfriend. Hours later she woke me up wanting sex, but she realized that I pissed the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 728

You deserved it 2 008

Hangover time

By Anonymous - 16/12/2010 20:30 - United States

Today, I woke up to find that I'd left my clothes in my roommate's bedroom. After returning from a night of heavy drinking, I apparently got up to use the bathroom and used her room as a toilet. I don't remember this, but pee stains don't lie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 335

You deserved it 30 370

By eggnoodles - 13/12/2009 05:44 - United States

Today, I woke up to find myself drenched in piss after a long night of drinking. I immediately sprang into action, tossing my bedding in the washer and hopping into the shower. Running late for work, I threw on a nice dress and got into my car. Guess who also peed in the drivers seat? FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 002

You deserved it 53 138

By Anonymous - 29/01/2019 16:00

Today, I am now sleeping on the floor because my friend got super drunk at a small party then peed herself in her sleep. I was sleeping beside her and my clothes smell like pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 148

You deserved it 237

By Anonymous - 30/08/2018 23:30

Today, I got home from work, took a shower, got ready for bed, and laid down right in cat piss. Now I'm shampooing the mattress and taking another shower just to sleep on the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 882

You deserved it 410

Keep it down

By Andy - 13/05/2012 02:21 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I attended a formal banquet. The host was delivering a speech, when I felt the urge to pee, so I tried to quietly excuse myself. My chair screeched over the floor as I got up, I tripped over my own feet, and I accidentally took the door leading outdoors, where I ended up peeing in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 474

You deserved it 4 367

By goldenshower - 05/02/2010 18:22 - United States

Today, I woke up at a guy's house drunk and soaked in my own pee. I had passed out with all my clothes on. Since I was late for work and didn't have a change of clothes, all I could do was throw my jeans in the dryer. I had to sit all day at work in crusty pee pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 494

You deserved it 56 484

Partaaaaay!

By Anonymous - 18/07/2013 18:16 - Canada - Kelowna

Today, I woke up after passing out at a very small house party. I'd set a three drink limit, but apparently nobody listened, because there were beer cans everywhere, half my stuff was on the floor, and someone had shat in my bathtub. I had to clean all of it up alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 124

You deserved it 46 967

By gold3nshow3r - 09/03/2017 20:00 - United States - Roanoke

Today, I woke up to a strange wetness covering my body. My drunk roommate's urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 564

You deserved it 434

Pissed off

By lionhead14 - 20/05/2011 19:05 - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up needing to wee. I was at my boyfriend's and didn't want to wake him, so I sat on the edge of the toilet and peed as quietly as possible. I realised after that I'd sat too far over and had peed on the floor. There was no loo paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 907

You deserved it 42 558

ambowew 7

Friday 21 October 2011 11:58

Really? You'd rather piss in a pot plant than simply ignore everyone while you walk to the toilet.

Tarak_fml 7

Friday 21 October 2011 11:59

Why exactly did that seem like a good idea?

Comments

texas_redneck88 10

Friday 21 October 2011 15:26

YDI, should of walked your lazy ass outta your room and to the bathroom

Bobissmall 13

Friday 21 October 2011 15:38

What did i just read..?

jaredofmo 22

Friday 21 October 2011 16:20

YDI, next time, just walk to the bathroom. Anyone notices you, just nod respectfully.

laden_swallow09 34

Friday 21 October 2011 16:20

Holy Shatner, people! It's "SHOULD'VE", contraction of "should HAVE" and not "should of". Golly jeepers, gee whiz, I must be the only Grammar Nazi who notices this! Heil, Spellcheck!

Okayitwasme 0

Friday 21 October 2011 17:38

If you keep judging the comments like that, No one will want to tell their stories. Some of the best books to read are written in slang. Give it a rest. (I do understand where you'r coming from.)

LaylaaMariee 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 4:54

if you don't like how people are talking on here then get the hell of it. End of story. Yeah thanks bye.

LaylaaMariee 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 4:54

if you don't like how people are talking on here then get the hell of it. End of story. Yeah thanks bye.

LaylaaMariee 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 4:54

if you don't like how people are talking on here then get the hell of it. End of story. Yeah thanks bye.

Penn2894 6

Friday 21 October 2011 16:24

I understand the not wanting to socialize thing, but you didn't have a window or a bottle or something else in your room that was more capable of holding your piss than a plant? I hope that smell doesn't stink up your room!