Miscellaneous: Today, my roomate informed me that her snake was missing in our...

By Anonymous - 28/10/2011 03:48 - United States

Today, my roomate informed me that her snake was missing in our apartment again. Apparently, I need to be careful because the snake's attracted to blood. I'm on my period. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 358

You deserved it 3 055

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
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Same thing different taste

Creepy

By Username - 03/10/2011 17:58 - United States

Today, my roommate informed me that one of her scorpions is loose in our apartment again. Great. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 500

You deserved it 3 364

Lurker

By Katie - 20/02/2011 08:35 - Reserved

Today, I woke up to an angry snake trying to climb the leg of my bed. My bedroom was closed all day yesterday. It must have gotten in my room days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 064

You deserved it 3 101

Psssssych!

By Welcome to Florida - 20/07/2017 13:01

Today, my son's glasses were missing. My bathroom is not well lit, but I noticed something sticking out from under the toilet seat. I excitedly grabbed it, thinking I saw the band of the glasses. Nope, it was a snake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 330

You deserved it 535

By Anonymous - 28/03/2011 18:52 - Macedonia

Today, my boyfriend tried to cure me of my snake phobia by buying one. When he took it out of the cage, it bit him. Now he's terrified of them too. Even worse, he dropped the snake, so it's now loose in our house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 781

You deserved it 6 878

Snek

By afraidtosleep - 13/10/2012 06:35 - United States - Houston

Today, as I was rushing to get out for work, I opened my door just in time to witness a large snake slither into my home. I had no choice but to lock it inside and go to work. I've now spent several hours searching for it with my friends, and we can't find it. I'm scared to go to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 968

You deserved it 6 324

Not on a plane

By Surewhatever - 16/10/2019 14:01

Today, when I warned my guests to check the toilet for snakes, I meant it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 456

You deserved it 131

By olive_costume - 05/12/2009 01:16 - Australia

Today, I went into my room and found a plastic snake on the floor. I yelled out to my sister, "Good one, Ellen!" I picked up the snake to take it to show her. The snake started moving in my hands and bit me. I had to go to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 712

You deserved it 8 061

By Anonymous - 20/11/2014 02:43 - United States - Boston

Today, my friendly neighbor asked me to check in on his apartment every few days while he's gone on vacation. You can imagine my horror when I walked in for the first time and found out he's a snake breeder. Twelve more days to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 055

You deserved it 3 775

By stillloverher - 19/09/2017 23:45

Today, when I woke up I saw that my bald head is covered with my wife's period blood. Again. She does it regularly once a month, despite asking her not to. She thinks this blood activates hair growth. She is serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 209

You deserved it 502

By Anonymous - 03/06/2015 01:34 - United States - West Chester

Today, my mother found my escaped pet snake after she had already washed and dried it with the laundry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 419

You deserved it 4 335

HerpYourDerp 7

Friday 28 October 2011 12:05

What do you mean, "again"? How many times has that snake been missing in your apartment?

Buttsexpirate 9

Friday 28 October 2011 12:08

While in the bathroom you're gonna hear "Feed me ssssseymour!"

Comments

jellybean5678 8

Friday 28 October 2011 21:10

Snakes aren't attracted to blood. So I wouldn't worry about it.

rubberduckie72 4

Friday 28 October 2011 21:18

what is it with all the dn snakes getting loose. thays why i like dogs. hard to loose a dog on the house.

eurostar710 11

Friday 28 October 2011 22:00

Snakes aren't attracted to blood... Not human blood anyway. Unless she feeds it humans. I would know. I keep snakes. If she feeds it eats it generally won't strike anything else for food, just for self defense. Good luck to her, I hope she finds her snake and can get it back in its enclosure and warm again. Just be careful. You'll be fine :)

j_cat187 19

Friday 28 October 2011 22:16

Mensal blood is different from regular bood. You're in the clear

hotaru2781 1

Friday 28 October 2011 23:19

That sucks.

Justforlolz 14

Friday 28 October 2011 23:55

2 - Damn, wish I was smart enough to think of that. ******* brilliant.

Ikickmidgets 11

Saturday 29 October 2011 0:03

at least someone's attracted to your dripping snizz...

eurostar710 11

Saturday 29 October 2011 0:17

I meant to say rats. Not eats. Sorry about that.

chosha_fml 26

Saturday 29 October 2011 0:37

Tell her if you find it first you're going to open the front door and let it out. Or kill it. That should make her look a little faster.

wilseibold 0

Saturday 29 October 2011 0:56

Snakes do mell but the thing is she has nothing to worry about they are not like sharks in being attracted to blood as long as she's not stickin a hamster or something of that nature in there it will leave her alone the heat on the other may attract it