Today, my girlfriend of 1 month came over and told me she wanted to talk to me. We sat down on the couch and she told me she was pregnant and that it was mine. I reminded her that we've never slept together. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, my girlfriend blew up at me for a comment I had made several weeks ago about not wanting kids. Then, she told me that she's pregnant. After consoling her and telling her that whatever we do, we'll do it together, she further explained that she's not sure if it's mine. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she feels pregnant. I didn't believe her, given how recently we had sex for the first time, so I told her to take a test to make sure. She's very sure now. FML
Today, I got a text from my girlfriend. After only having sex once, where I wore a condom and didn't even get to come, she says that she's pregnant. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of five months is pregnant. Apparently, she stopped taking her pill two months ago because "we" wanted a baby. I don't recall ever having that discussion with her. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. She also said I'm going to be an uncle. FML
Today, my fiancée, who believes in "sex after marriage" like me, told me she was pregnant. FML
Today, my girlfriend freaked out, thinking she might be pregnant due to her period being late. I found myself reminding her that one actually has to have had sex recently to become pregnant. We've been living together, sexless, for over a year. FML
Today, my girlfriend told her parents that she's pregnant. We have never even come close to having sex, but she told them I'm the father. Not only is my girlfriend cheating on me, but her father now wants me dead. FML
Today, my girlfriend, who I've been living with for the last month, told me she's not attracted to me and wants to see other people. She told me this after months of dating and telling me she was thinking about having a child with me. FML
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Top comments
Mehness 0
She pulled a Mary on you.
iAmScrubs 19
Dr. Phil will know the answer!
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Comments (239)
fairypower 4
that's because the babies daddy dumped her ass the night before
unkhammun 5
oh wow.... what a dumbass!!! just keep screwing that sperm dumpster for a bit and then peel off my man, an thank the lord you had the will to keep it tucked in all of this time. if not, you would be ****** right now! lol
lmaoatall 6
I've heard of pretty stupid stuff in my life, but this one goes well beyond, almost a scary crazy level. be grateful it's not yours and move on. without her of course.
cathylee22 4
well apparently your gf is a cheater and knows the real father isn't as good of a guy as you. Ya I feel sorry for her, but then again karma is a bitch!
kingatowning 2
she could have raped u when you were sleeping
Lizardreath 0
get out while you still can!!!
RideOrDie1248 0
lol dont worry. females dont believe in being faithful anymore. they behave like ***** and then wonder why and complain about chivalry being dead.
Pesi 0
not all women are ***** excuse me. I've never cheated on a boyfriend and now happily engaged and faithful as the first day we've been together. so please be a little less vague. how about "alot of women who don't care about themselves, are *****" :) just saying that's an option.
RideOrDie1248 0
whoever gave me a thumbs down must be an idealist and not a realist. facts are facts.
lmaoatall 6
facts are, men are ***** to! so don't be so one sided. now here's my fact. most, not all but most of the relationships I've seen my friends break up over, it was the man cheating. it goes both ways. but those are my facts!!
SteelCladAngel 0
I'm not a **** I'm a female saying all females are ***** is like saying all men are straight
Shadow_Phantom 26
@52: Wow. I'm a realist too, but the correct term would not be "ALL FEMALES." Maybe SOME or A LOT are, but not ALL. You're either ignorant, or a troll. As for the OP, I hope she's your Ex now.
mrbattleman 10
wow! getting her pregnant without even having sex?! you should always wear a condom because your sperm is potent!
cool517 1
she is looking for a daddy for her baby the real one is in jail
babyydolly 0
Quite a smart girlfriend you got there. Dorry but FYL