fairypower

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toledo, USA
43 years-old
Friday 09 April 1982
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Fairypower's favorite FMLs

By dealingdave - 19/12/2011 12:24 - United States

Today, I dropped my 7-year-old son off at school. He decided to have fun and step out of my car screaming "Stranger danger" while running away and pointing at me. I then had to get out of my car to shut the door he'd left wide open. This caused 20 other kids to scream "Stranger danger" as well. FML

agreeclassic 34 348

vote type 1 3 052

dealingdave app_comment_confession_title

dealingdave 3

Tuesday 20 December 2011 0:36

I did not ground the boy. I simply told him his entire life belongs to me now until he's 18!

Detained

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff

Today, I found out that if a cop asks you if you have any weapons, and you reply by saying, "Only these guns!" while flexing your biceps, they won't take it very well. Neither will the cops down at the station. FML

agreeclassic 14 072

vote type 1 51 109

By Anonymous - 16/07/2011 02:06 - United States

Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML

agreeclassic 40 610

vote type 1 9 137

By 613tanner - 19/05/2011 05:30

Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time". He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML

agreeclassic 13 466

vote type 1 70 347

Let me Slytherin

By Wisconsin love - 13/12/2010 17:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML

agreeclassic 46 012

vote type 1 10 976