Today, my girlfriend guilted me into roleplaying as Justin Bieber before and during sex. I now feel physically ill. FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, my girlfriend wanted to role-play non-consensual sex. I was already uncomfortable with the idea, and when she started begging, "No, no" as I stripped her, I dropped the role-play and walked out. Now she's pissed at me. I'm sorry, but this is fucking creepy. FML
Today, my girlfriend wanted to roleplay as a schoolgirl. I was excited, until we started and she asked me to lick her "vajayjay". I cringed so hard, my skull practically caved in. I broke down laughing while trying to explain my cringing. Now she's pissed and I'm blue-balled. FML
Today, I had a dream where I was giving Justin Bieber a blowjob. I'm a totally straight male. I have half a mind to bill the little bastard for therapy sessions. FML
Today, I was trying to be dirty with my fiancé. He got really into the roleplaying and wouldn't stop pretending to be a cop for hours. Mood officially killed. FML
Today, my girlfriend admitted she had a nightmare about having sex with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend convinced me to do some bedroom roleplay, and we decided on acting out a job interview scenario. I suggestively told her that if she wanted to get the job, she'd have to use her mouth on something else first. She called me a pig and ended the roleplay right there. FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job when she started crying. Despite my pleas for her to stop and attempts to comfort her, she insisted that she continue. I feel like a monster. FML
Today, my wife and I decided to try out role playing. She ended up having an anxiety attack when I said she wasn't turning in her homework. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting pretty hot and heavy, then he said, "Let's pretend you're someone else." FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Did you scream "baby, baby, baby, ooh..."?
cmayer 20
I am so very sorry for your misfortune.
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Comments (250)
MerrikBarbarian 9
I'm sitting here trying to figure out if this is better or worse than some of the role play sex I've gotten into... It involved Emperor Palpatine from Star Wars. Probably worse. Palpatine at least has power going for him :p
Llamanator9913 16
Make her role play as something for payback... then she will know what it feels like
TheDrifter 24
Since OP is feeling ill, maybe she can be his naughty nurse and stiffen his sagging resolve.
amiewithaj 13
Holy mother of a novel response to the most common beiber joke around
mymiles 13
She is obviously too young to be having sex
muise 11
That's rough
laurenlovesjb 20
49- When he visited me I gave his music a chance for the first time, and I liked it. But his new album is way better and more mature than the old one... Anyway I really don't think he's mean spirited. I met him, he gave me some hope when I was at rock bottom. Not because he was famous, but because he had the right words and he really just made it clear he didn't want to see people like me give up. And he certainly isn't the most talented person to ever live, but I honestly believe that he is a person that had some raw talent at a young age that has been molded into what he is now.
flea_of_death 23
You wouldn't happen to be op's girlfriend, would you?
bv2332 10
HAHAHAHAHAHSyou did it????? Your gay!!!!!
taffy1239 3
You should have peed in a bucket and squirted her with cleaning supplies.
jw90 18
A weird fetish of hers?