Today, my girlfriend guilted me into roleplaying as Justin Bieber before and during sex. I now feel physically ill. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my girlfriend wanted to role-play non-consensual sex. I was already uncomfortable with the idea, and when she started begging, "No, no" as I stripped her, I dropped the role-play and walked out. Now she's pissed at me. I'm sorry, but this is fucking creepy. FML
Today, my girlfriend wanted to roleplay as a schoolgirl. I was excited, until we started and she asked me to lick her "vajayjay". I cringed so hard, my skull practically caved in. I broke down laughing while trying to explain my cringing. Now she's pissed and I'm blue-balled. FML
Today, I had a dream where I was giving Justin Bieber a blowjob. I'm a totally straight male. I have half a mind to bill the little bastard for therapy sessions. FML
Today, I was trying to be dirty with my fiancé. He got really into the roleplaying and wouldn't stop pretending to be a cop for hours. Mood officially killed. FML
Today, my girlfriend admitted she had a nightmare about having sex with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend convinced me to do some bedroom roleplay, and we decided on acting out a job interview scenario. I suggestively told her that if she wanted to get the job, she'd have to use her mouth on something else first. She called me a pig and ended the roleplay right there. FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job when she started crying. Despite my pleas for her to stop and attempts to comfort her, she insisted that she continue. I feel like a monster. FML
Today, my wife and I decided to try out role playing. She ended up having an anxiety attack when I said she wasn't turning in her homework. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting pretty hot and heavy, then he said, "Let's pretend you're someone else." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Welshite 40
Did you scream "baby, baby, baby, ooh..."?
cmayer 20
I am so very sorry for your misfortune.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (250)
Panda_Shy_Haven 17
I feel soooooo bad for you. I so sorry you had to live through that
Dempsey_xoxo 7
Nvm read this wrong, derp
dragondude2 7
The real question is, how did you manage to spontaneously grow a ******?
LissaMccracken 23
I look up to Bert Mccracken and if someone was saying shit about him, I wouldn't have been as nice as the girl sticking up for Justin Beiber... You know? People like different things, I personally think Justin is popular for his looks and not his "talent", I've never met a dude who likes him... But you know, whatever. I'm just trying to say that she can like whatever and you guys can like whatever, let's not argue :) I think I'm gonna get thumbed down for this, but I just wanted that said..
MrZsDad 19
So you coming out of the closet o what?
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Bert sucks nowadays. Saw him like 4 years ago and had a blast, badass vocals. Saw him last year and his pansy ass had to bring in some douche bag to hit some of his own notes. Just sad in my opinion. Nothing against his personality though, he's real nice and one of the chilliest lead singers I've met.
inumiko 12
You poor soul! :(
kemando 22
Well, now you have leverage to get her to roleplay practically anything you want.
Pwn17 25
Why is Lauren receiving so much criticism? Personally, I hate JB because I think he is a little prick who sings terribly, but it's her opinion, and at the very least she isn't acting like 99% of the other mindless beliebers. Also, quit it with the "JB is a girl" jokes. His voice isn't even high anymore, find some new material.
salic77 11
Are you dating someone you "shouldn't" be or what OP? ....... This is a bit odd as most girls my age (and I'm 22..) don't really go for the Disney drop off types.