Today, my girlfriend and I were in bed. She slipped her hand under the duvet, and I got all excited thinking she was going to give me a hand job. She was actually pulling out her wedgie. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend when I felt her slip her hand into my pants. She then gave me a wedgie. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML
Today, my girlfriend, who never initiates sex, pulled me into my room and onto my bed with kisses and other seductive behavior. As I'm thinking about how awesome it is that's she's doing this for once, she reaches down, grabs my underwear, and gives me the worst wedgie I've ever received. FML
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend and told him how smitten I was with him. He responded by giving me a wedgie. FML
Today, while laying in bed with my girlfriend, I felt her grab my manhood through a layer of blankets. I got a bit stiff, just in time for her to clench tight, and pull violently. She didn't know "it" was in her hand, as she was trying to cover herself with the blanket. My manhood is now red and swollen. FML
Today, my girlfriend text me and told me to do something sexy because she was going to FaceTime me. I eagerly dropped my pants and started stroking it to get ready for her. As soon as I opened her call, she was standing with my wife. I literally got caught with my dick in my hand. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She had her whole hand in me kind of deep. It was hitting everything inside me and triggered me to poop a little bit, on her arm and the bed. FML
Today, I was following my girlfriend up the stairs, I was pretty sure I was going to get lucky. As I was almost up the set of stairs, she lifted her skirt and revealed to me that she wasn't wearing any panties. I fell backwards down the stairs. FML
Today, my girlfriend stuck her finger up my butt while giving me a hand-job, promising it would feel really good. It just felt awkward and made me need to poop. FML
Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML
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Top comments
gntfmlingnow 12
Remove the underwear. No more wedgie! Solving problems one at a time.
nfjskcbdkdjdjdn 2
You know, there's this magical thing called sleeping, and it's commonly done in a bed. But that doesn't matter, because if you're in bed with someone, it's all about sex, right?
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Comments (141)
simpleman124 1
Sorry but that's really lame
BunBunBabe 8
If you didn't ask for one, try that instead of hoping
jasonll81 1
Maybe it's because you use words like duvet.
Timmeeh 17
"Duvet" is a pretty common term in the UK, that being where this poster is from. There's no stigma behind using the word here. Not everyone in the world lives where you do; remember this.
micahsmommy 13
I think we should make the standard word, "a fluffy warming device that people sleep under", then maybe all the crazy people will stop complaining about the use of "duvet". Who knew it was such a controversial word?
murdersquirrel 15
So if a woman puts her hand under the covers you automatically assume there will be sexual favors? YDI for unreasonable expectations.
Eorlas 31
He got excited and thought he would be lucky. There was no assuming it was all a hope.
TazInYourPantz 13
Not just "a woman" - his girlfriend. There's absolutely nothing wrong with him wanting a handjob and getting his hopes up.
ambamm135 7
Loo guys are funny like that. Even the sweetest guy you know would probably get excited like that as well. It's just an urge they have and it's really hard to control. Think of it as animal instinct.
murdersquirrel 15
Yeah ok, girlfriend, whatever. My point is the same. Why would putting your hands under the covers translate to preparing to make a move? Way to over think the simple actions of another person. Girlfriend or not.
EmDizzle2007 28
shut.... up.
braiden122 0
Haha too funny u got excited over hj
SarahSunshine19 2
By looking at your picture you look too young to even know what a hand job is.
xocellaox 0
bahahaha too true^
SoSickWithIt 14
^ and by your picture you look like you don't understand the concept of modesty on your make up. :D
GUNZnRAIGN 6
you are like 12 years old.. act your age, tough guy
perdix 31
You're in bed with your girlfriend and you're thinking hand job? That's some pretty low expectations there! Bed is for ******* and sucking. Hand jobs are for movie theaters and airplanes where you can't easily do the good stuff.
twisted_cherub 14
Really? I typically fall asleep playing with my boyfriend's junk. He either falls asleep, too, or wakes me up to finish. It's relaxing and leads to other stuff about 50% of the time.
perdix 31
See, when it leads to other things, I consider that foreplay and not a hand job. If you make him come with just your hand, that's a hand job. Maybe it's just the way I account for things.
alec199 3
Hahaha
alec199 3
Hahaha
Epiqness 0
Maybe next time bro.
crablegs 2
Wth is a duvet
Bekll 31
http://lmgtfy.com/?q=Duvet