Today, my four-year-old daughter started screaming and lashing out at me as I was getting her ready for a bath. It seems my idiot husband told her she was still small enough to be feasted on by the "drain monster". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was watching my 3-year-old sister play in the bathtub. She started screaming at her toys, saying "You're staying under the water until you DIE!" She then looked at me and cackled. I share a room with this demon child. FML
It's the new thing!
Today, my 14 year-old daughter threw a massive fit over showering. She dislodged the shower curtain rod and threatened to beat us with it if we ever force her to shower again. FML
Today, my daughter spent three hours crying and having a temper tantrum over being forced to have a bath after four days without one. My daughter is 16. FML
Toilet training
Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML
Today, I gave my 8-month-old a bath in the kitchen sink after dinner, like I always do. Today, she decided to poop in it. FML
Today, I woke up to my 2-year-old daughter hitting me in the face. She had just pooped her nappy and put her hands down her pants to "feel it squish around." FML
**** my shit up
Today, my four-year-old daughter thought it'd be funny to cut my hair while I was sleeping. FML
Bad timing
Today, my daughter locked herself in the bathroom having a tantrum after her boyfriend dumped her. So, out of sheer desperation, I had to sit in the kitchen sink for a pee, which is when my husband walked in with his mother and sister. FML
Today, while my husband and I are both stuck in the bathroom from food poisoning, our 3-year-old son is taking advantage of his freedom. All I can hear is banging noises and wild laughter. I'm afraid to leave the bathroom. FML
Hair care
Today, my shower is being renovated so I washed my hair in the kitchen sink. I put my two year-old son on the counter next to me so I could keep him close. As I was rinsing out my hair, my son started playing with the light switches. He flicked the garbage disposal by accident. FML
Top comments
SkoomaKi 28
Tell her you are a drain monster fighter. Arm yourself with bleach, a plunger and a knife. Tell your daughter to wait outside, go into the bathroom. Make some grunting noises, come out and say the monster is dead. It should work, if not slap the husband and tell him to reassure your daughter.
turtlemanz 8
Lol nomnom
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Comments (159)
uberhaxorjames 1
Awe she is probably scared for life
alychick 5
Nice husband. I would kick his ass and tell him to tell her it's not real. What. Jerk for making her scared:(
alychick 5
-what a jerk- I corrected it because of grammar nazis. Yeah you know who you are.
alychick 5
Tell your husband the drain monster only eats small things. Like his penis. ( this is her friend so don't hate on her)
Hamo 5
He was probably doing it to scare her for fun but it inconvenienced you. If you're calling him an idiot that must mean that you've had a bad day and her screaming didn't help. FYL OP and I hope tomorrow and you get along :)
CaptMurdock 25
Next time let your husband bathe her then.
CaptMurdock 25
Next time have your husband bathe her then.
koopaqueen 0
Anyone else get scared of the drain in the tub after seeing that rugrats episode?
marisadc79 0
Wow I hope you can calm her fears and shame on dad what a jerk thing to do to a little girl
Ugi 27
People wonder why there are so many ******-up adults in the world and then persist on doing this type of thing to children! You are your child's window on the world. She will believe what you say and be scared of the scary things you tell her about. If she grows up with an abiding fear of water then dad will have spoiled everything from scuba-diving to the joy of a long soak in a hot bath for her. And all because he wanted a cheap laugh at her naivety. He should grow up and think about what he is doing to his own kid.
OffToTheGayBar 9
I saw commercials of It as a child. I was utterly horrified. Make sure you have the Ritual of Chud all worked out. Otherwise, you're ******.