baldspot
Australia
Today, my daughter decided to wake me up by putting the vacuum in my hair and turning it on. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
No-Sleep Nellie
Waterloo, United States
Today, my mother woke me up by loudly vacuuming the house. I had to work the next morning, so I asked her what she was thinking. She told me that if I was really tired and needed sleep, I wouldn't have woken up. It was 3 AM. FML
hair2daygone4ever
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
United States
**** my shit up
Today, my four-year-old daughter thought it'd be funny to cut my hair while I was sleeping. FML
crazydaughter
Egypt
Today, I walked in on my daughter trying to blow-dry the sweat off her armpits instead of showering. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Pipe down!
Today, I woke up to the sound of my roommate vacuuming at 7 a.m. I was annoyed because I had stayed up late, but then I realized she was vacuuming in the kitchen… at 7 a.m. because the broom "wasn't powerful enough." I gave her the benefit of the doubt until she started vacuuming my bedroom floor while I was still in bed. FML
Anonymous
New York, United States
Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML
sheridan.ashley
Australia
Today, my sister decided to wake me up by pumping handwash into my open mouth. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff
United States
Twisted firestarter
Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML
So so close to clean
Warren, United States
Proper job
Today, with words of encouragement from my mom, I vacuumed my room. After finishing and admiring my job well done, I went to put the vacuum away. It caught on the plug for my electric razor which was dangling below the dresser and yanked that and everything else that was on top of it off. FML
joey
Zapped
Today, my mom decided to try her new taser on me while I was asleep on the couch. FML
w_t_f
United States
Today, I woke up to the sound of scissors. My mom was cutting my hair while I was asleep. FML
Top comments
McDonaldsworker 4
I hope OP is alright, I think god is doing just fine.
Lythiaren 8
Oh god, I hope you're alright.
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Comments (107)
I_Hug_Cats 26
You mean your hair in our vacuum...?
I_Hug_Cats 26
Your*...
CryMoreFMLs 15
No, it got eaten by a cannibal rainbow. I thought that was pretty obvious.
coffee_man900 16
#45 That has got to be one of the best offbeat responses I have ever read. Thumbs up for that. :)
MonsterCommenter 4
It could always be worse. What if she had put it on your testicles or some other sensitive area such as that?
Climaxx 11
OP is a woman. Just so you know (:
AwkwardPartyBear 24
I would hope op doesn't have testicles since she is a girl
RedPillSucks 33
That would be a new fml. Today I went to sleep as a woman and awoke to a vacuum cleaner blowing testicles into me.
nsnforever 2
Maybe I'm just a douchebag, but this made my morning. I mean, really. Who decides to wake someone up like that?! Haha. Anyways. I hope you're alright, OP. FYL.
laurenobrien 4
Lmao I agree
TheCaterpiller 6
Ouch..... Time to find a wig
DontForgetMe4 0
I know this is unlikely but isn't it a funny mental image, if he was already wearing fake hair and that vacuum sucked it all off?
DontForgetMe4 0
Sorry, she.*
TheCaterpiller 6
Lol imagine the embarrassment
jerseyboy732 16
that sucks
KaelaKhaotic 5
Oww! That really sucks!
IdfkMyUsernamexC 5
Him?
Mojjy 3
Hahaha that's something new
DontForgetMe4 0
Ah, pardon me, OP is a woman. done her*
Gothicbunnyx3 16
Oh God OP! your name made me laugh. :)