Today, my mother woke me up by loudly vacuuming the house. I had to work the next morning, so I asked her what she was thinking. She told me that if I was really tired and needed sleep, I wouldn't have woken up. It was 3 AM. FML
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Today, I had three days off work. My mom woke me up for work on all three of those days, despite my repeatedly asking her not to. When I actually had to go to work this morning, she didn't wake me up. At least I wasn't late. FML
Today, I wanted to do something nice for my mom. So, while she was sleeping, I cleaned the whole house for her and even made her breakfast. A few minutes later, she came downstairs and yelled at me to keep it down because she was trying to sleep. FML
Today, I finally had a day off in two weeks and I was excited about getting to sleep in. At 5 a.m., my mom loudly knocked and came in. When I asked her what she wanted, she said she was checking to see if I was asleep. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my roommate vacuuming at 7 a.m. I was annoyed because I had stayed up late, but then I realized she was vacuuming in the kitchen… at 7 a.m. because the broom "wasn't powerful enough." I gave her the benefit of the doubt until she started vacuuming my bedroom floor while I was still in bed. FML
Today, I woke up early, went to the gym, then came home and showered. When I went into my room to change, my mom woke up and started pounding on my door, screaming about how lazy and useless I was for sleeping so late. When I tried to tell her otherwise, she grounded me for "talking back". FML
Today, after getting home from a twelve-hour shift at work, I got into bed and passed out. My mother soon woke me up, screaming that she could tell I was "fake sleeping" and ignoring her lecture on how I need to stop being so "lazy". FML
Today, my daughter decided to wake me up by putting the vacuum in my hair and turning it on. FML
Today, I wasn't sure if I would have to go to work. My mom told me the night before that she would wake me up if I had to. I woke up, and seeing that it was past the time I normally go to work, I happily assumed I got called off. That is, until I got a phone call from my boss asking me why I wasn't there yet. FML
Today, my parents made me wake up at 7 a.m., like every morning. When I woke up exhausted, my mom rolled her eyes and said, "It’s called going to bed earlier." I went to bed at 10 p.m. last night. I fell asleep at 5 am. FML
Today, it’s the fifth day in a row that my mom has vacuumed right outside my room, from 5 to 11 AM. Despite this, I still can’t fall asleep before midnight. FML
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Top comments
ChristinePi 36
Well when she's sleeping you should do some cleaning of your own and if she questions you, give her the same response.
MrSassypants 33
Cleaning, I think.
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Comments (58)
jet223 20
Well she's right. I mean if you were really tired, you would be asleep at 3 a.m. and not hear your bitch of a mother's loud ass cleaning apparatus. God.
CaptainCrow 13
People are failing to see the sarcasm
cornyrob 33
She should have been vacuuming quietly.
Fairyjoshy 13
@29 Poe's Law.
leogachi 15
Your mom is a self-centered bitch.
ChristinePi 36
Well when she's sleeping you should do some cleaning of your own and if she questions you, give her the same response.
JKW35 21
While she's sleeping, put her sheets in the wash
Rebles 15
Not just sheets, her sleeping gown as well. Then everyone will be surprised when she wakes up the next morning stark naked. Slept right though that.
cOOkiEzRgOOd 22
My old friend's mother had insomnia and would pull these kinds of things. FYL OP and maybe invest in some noise-canceling headphones.
not_your_taco 15
Guess she couldn't go to sleep until she vacuumed that damn dust....
hussamhasi 22
Can't they create silent vaccum it's one of the world's first problems
jet223 20
You mean first world problems right?
TripleATeam 13
Ah, yes. Getting eaten, foraging for food, and worst of all: vacuuming! The horrible tribulations of early man.
imkool136 22
Go clean and vacuum her room in the middle of the night when she's sleeping and tell her you just wanted to be nice and help clean up.
daddysgirl243 21
Start vacuuming right when she falls asleep next time
MrSassypants 33
Cleaning, I think.