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*Billy Mays voice* "Say hello to the all new OxiLawn, a new product that modernizes raking leaves by making your mum drunk."

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I have vacuumed the lawn before, and I was sober!! But that was because I lost a small earring and couldn't see it so we got out the vacuum to pick up loose things in the grass and tipped it onto a mat.

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*Scottish guy for Scott's lawn care* "Brand new Scott's Lawn Vacuum. Cleans out harmful bugs and pesticides, and helps restore grass to it's healthiest and thickest. Make sure your mum is completely wasted before she uses it. Clean ya Lawn. Clean it!"

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#111- Never explain your references. Especially if they're irrelevant. Just because it's relevant to another FML as well doesn't make it relevant in this one. Shoo, fly,

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It's not irrelevant 122. I was saying that he made a comment after me with the same exact joke as mine, and he posted it a day after I did mine. So, that's where I got "cloned" from.

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Yes, she's an eccentric, and only in her mid-fourties. Also, since my nan got cancer she's been trying to live her life however the fuck she wants, no holds barred.

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"Hey mom, It's the grass is always greener, not always cleaner on the other side, step into the house again you drunken wench"

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