Today, my boyfriend tried to serenade me with The Sex is Good by Saving Abel. According to him, "I have to fake it, I'd leave if I could. I'm not in love, but the sex is good." FML
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By
sourgirl101
| 28
That's like "I hate every bone in your body but mine" by Poison's CC Deville.(:
By
davidjr_saldana
| 0
que?
COMMENTS
By
davidjr_saldana
| 0
que?
Reply
KingDingALing
| 9
C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!
I've always wanted to do that. Now I can check that off my list. Let's see, what's my next goal?
It say's here "Get first comment on an FML".
I'll do it! Dun dun dunnnn!
I've always wanted to do that. Now I can check that off my list. Let's see, what's my next goal?
It say's here "Get first comment on an FML".
I'll do it! Dun dun dunnnn!
Reply
KaySL
| 24
Remember what happened the last time you did that, Ling-Ling? They say you still can't sit down properly, and you know what, maybe that's for the best :D
Reply
roeallen
| 11
I believe that "King-a-Ling" got too into it, and actually punctured his fallopian tubes. Ah well, there is always the last option on your list: making sandwiches.
Reply
KingDingALing
| 9
It's okay. I'm used to it! Thanks to all the roofies that were slipped into my drinks! Let's see the list of people that spiked my drink.
1) KaySL
2) KaySL
3) KaySL
4) KaySL
5) KaySL
Hmm...I think I see a pattern...
1) KaySL
2) KaySL
3) KaySL
4) KaySL
5) KaySL
Hmm...I think I see a pattern...
Reply
Doortje
| 28
KingDingALing, your obsession with Kay is getting a little out of hand. He has only said a few words to you, but your brain tricks you into thinking you have some sort of relationship with him. He didn't spike your drinks, he didn't molest you.. I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this, but you are sick. You need to schedule an appointment with a doctor and/or shrink right away. I recommend DocBastard.
Reply
KaySL
| 24
I appreciate my lawyer's attempt to defuse the situation, but I feel I have to state that I am indeed a sick sex offender who's been routinely spiking LingLing's drinks and ruining the hell out of his luscious ass. I can't be judged for that.
Reply
Doortje
| 28
Damn it Kay, what did I say? Let ME do the talking!
Reply
KaySL
| 24
I'm guilty as fuck, judge, even guiltier than DocBastard every time he stands in for the OBGYN chick. Please execute me, sir. Painfully.
Reply
Doortje
| 28
Just remember, you'll still have to pay me.
Reply
UpsidedownKayak
| 9
KaySL, you are hereby sentenced to be anally raped until you bleed to death. Your last meal will be a hot lunch.
Reply
KingDingALing
| 9
It's almost the same as Kay's obsession with Sirin. Don't judge me, okay! :(
Reply
KingDingALing
| 9
On a side note, I told you, Doortje! He did spike my drink! So what if I liked it? It's perfectly normal...
Reply
sourgirl101
| 28
In all fairness, I think everyone's obsessed with Sirin. Some just voice it more than others.(:
Reply
KaySL
| 24
To be fair, I also perv on anyone with the power to satisfy my frankly sick desire to be used, abused, discarded, and made an example of. The being executed in cold blood part is just a side fetish.
Reply
Doortje
| 28
Of course he did KDaL. But you can't expect me to admit that, I am after all his lawyer.
It is almost the same as Kay's sick obsession with Sirin, in fact that is why I'm warning you. As his lawyer, I've spent a lot of time with him and let me tell you: he is one messed up crackhead.
It is almost the same as Kay's sick obsession with Sirin, in fact that is why I'm warning you. As his lawyer, I've spent a lot of time with him and let me tell you: he is one messed up crackhead.
Reply
KingDingALing
| 9
And a good lawyer you are, Doortje. That is why I have some horrible news....
Kay, I will no longer be stalking you. I'm moving on. I found someone else to stalk. I will now stalk Doortje. I have a sick obsession with her.
Kay, I will no longer be stalking you. I'm moving on. I found someone else to stalk. I will now stalk Doortje. I have a sick obsession with her.
Reply
flipstar530
| 0
hilarious stuff u guys. lol
Reply
moosemonkey1000
| 6
are those cupcakes??!!
Reply
Doortje
| 28
Yes. And no, you can't have them Cookie Monster!
Reply
TibbysMusic
| 1
That while thread of a conversation is exactly why I get on FML. I love you guys.
Reply
TibbysMusic
| 1
whole* I freaking hate auto correct.
Reply
andrewzzz
| 0
aight judge, wheres the guy im supposed to anally rape to death?
By
bravesfan112233
| 0
you've never had sex period
By
traze
| 7
WTF( ? _ ? )
By
maddyturkey
| 0
this isn't an fml
By
angelspit18
| 0
maybe you should have sex more often... than convince your self was "great" :/
By
Filitov
| 0
Okay, so your boyfriend is shallow. If it bothers you that much, then try to talk with him & work through it together. Or you could just take the easy way out & dump him as I'm sure plenty of other people will advise for you to do so.
Reply
victimization
| 0
Thanks Dr. Phil! We must remember to send you a thank you card for fixing our lives.
By
PuppiesFTW
| 5
i dont see any problems with that :P
By
cowboyy_fml
| 0
dump his ass
By
PuppiesFTW
| 5
there's nothing to see here...
By
Loulabelle
| 0
Atleast the sex is good..
Reply
enoughgrace
| 4
true that.
Reply
DaveOnDope
| 4
for him