By Anonymous - 30/08/2010 06:02 - United States

Spicy
Today, my boyfriend told everyone I queef during sex. Even his parents are calling me "Cooter Pooter." FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 815
You deserved it 6 916

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FFML_314 11

Your boyfriend is an arsehole.

Seriously, some of you talk like you're still stuck in prepuberty. Especially #26. A "queef" is nothing more but trapped air which gets out. There is not even any fragrance to it. Therefore it does have NOTHING to do with hygienics. There should be mandatory IQ tests for individuals wanting to use the internet. Just like a driver license.

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lol. cooter pooter? that's great. :] but yeah your bf's a jerk. fyl

RecklessJellyBea 7

Well, next time you queef, stick some confetti and decorations in there so when he's eating you out.. BAM!

sandi315 0

haha I couldn't help but laugh to this one anyway ydi for sex before marriage

imababeee 0

no it's not deserved, maybe your against sex before marriage but it's their choice. good on you op for getting laid ;)

its totally a natural part of sex, but its something that does not been to be broadcast. i agree you should tell everyone he doesnt last more than a few minutes, our that he has ED see how much he appreciates bedroom secrets being told to all.

start calling him 'minute man' and see how he likes it.

PimpdaddyCJT 13

lol^^^

iTaylor 0

omg your boyfriend sucks for telling everyone that.

Yeah!!! Nice & Moist!! 

Nice keg, #28

americuzz 8

your boyfriend sucks!!! but can anyone tell me^^ what quif are??

mshoes12346 3

a fart in ur vagina

14 is either 12 years old or a fundie. Either way, you need to STFU. Would you drive a car without test driving it? Would you buy shoes without trying them on? I think not. Gotta test out the merchandise.

I actually use my muscles to push out trapped air during sex so I guess I queef on purpose lol. The sound is not sexy, but it feels so much better and tighter without the air in there...

That_Guy_Jake_JR 0

Your boyfriend is ignorant.

#14 how the hell does she deserve it? Even if she had waited till marriage she would still be stuck in the situation even more so than before. Keep your religious opinions to yourself. i hope you get a husband that sucks in bed or when he figures out that he is gay after having sex with you and or has a small penis.

NightSkyx 0

ew lol

abeyhl 0

LoL!

My ex used to do that too. It can sometimes kill the mood......especially when you lol

you tell 'em 62. lol. Gay Republicans always wait until marriage, but eventually get busted in the airport mens room or park or hiring gay hustlers ;)

53 - no, you don't have to 'test it out'. I respect people who wait for marriage even though I don't because I'm too horny lol. good things are worth waiting for, and when a couple waits for marriage it's usually not good at first but becomes good, even if they aren't good like porn stars they still enjoy it because they love the person. saving yourself for that special someone is an amazing feeling, I wish I could have saved myself for my boyfriend. and OP, your boyfriends a dick, I agree with people and tell everyone he doesn't last long. but queefs make me lol :)

ucofresh 4

Why would you wait till marriage to have sex? Geez... you're an idiot.

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bigblue95 0

please no when to have sex debates please. im begging u. ur not chsnging the others opinion

_Damien_ 0

cooter tooter? or maybe pussy whistle? or! your pussy lyric, but I cunt hear it! lol iduno

I hate when people come up with all these different reasons to wait to have fun. not just sex before marrage, but the strict drinking laws in America, pot being illegalized, and even though I hate them, ciggarett smoking age, it does more harm than good.

wowthatshorrible_fml 0

yes but those things can't get pregnant

wowthatshorrible_fml 0

that last comment was to 53

lol epic win o_0

tienjt 3

Why not wait until marriage? What better way is there to say "I love you" than to wait? Would you like it if you had to say to your spouse, "Oh, I've fucked several other people before meeting you"? Besides, sex is not some kind of binding force that keeps you married and happy. I have an aunt who has never had sex with her husband, yet they've been happily married for 30 years. I happen to be agnostic, so don't tell me to keep my religious beliefs to myself.

116, you just keep being that boring kid that never has any real fun. more for me. and sex fucking rules, why not do it? life, god, whoever gave it to us and it feels awesome.. not hurting anyone.. sounds good to me! and for 'cooter pooter', he's either to immature to have sex or he's just s douche. ditch em

MrTvor 0

Stop talking about your sex life through fml comments your flexible vagina and this I don't think people want to read about it.

who the Hell cares that you moderated this?

116 Im not tellin u to not wait until marriage just stop telling others that its their dam fault for not waiting til marriage. that shit pisses me off. not everyone has as much of a problem getting laid as the ppl claiming to wait until marriage. its just a coverup so to make it look like they had the choice to get laid when they cant lol. And all your gonna do is cause her pain when you do it for the first time and youll end up with her blood on you and her in tears. idk about you but i dont like to see my love in pain. but u go right ahead man! be my guest. nothing says i love you more then shoving ur penis in too small of hole and causing her pain and suffering.

this is a late reply but, 126, he wasn't saying it was their fault. also, with your talk about him hurting is wife, does that mean if you fell in love with a girl and she was a virgin you wouldn't have sex with her? your point was pointless and dumb. you and 119 look like douche bags with not only what y'all said, but what y'alls shirtless pictures. just go die, manwhores.

Lmao. whatever you say. and no if i had a virgin girlfriend i wouldnt not have sex with her ide just not be so happy about hurting her.ive done it before and i really didnt like hurting her. So you can call me a manwhore nonetheless i still care about most of the ppl i sleep with. so stop making pathetic and false accusations. And my statement wasnt pointless and dumb and many ppl think the same thing dollface. But like you said. because i have picture of my abs im automatically a D-bag and have no soul. lol

oh and i wasnt saying he said that it was their fault. I just dislike it when ppl say its the OP's fault for not waiting till marriage. it obviously sends the message that theyre some kind of whore or something for not waiting.

I don't see why everyone has to make such a big deal of this. y'all (that's right I'm southern) need to get a shovel and clean the sand out of your vaginas. then make a fuckin' sand castle. everyone has different religious beliefs and we shouldn't hate them for it.

10's pic? wtf is that a fucking man fat tits? disgusting

Because marriage automatically puts a stop to queefing. :/ I smell a troll...

leztg 0

not all republicans wait u know I know ppl who are and yet didn't wait it's about whether the person is ready or not so keep your political views to yourself

"Today, i argued about premarital sex through the comments of an fml post about queefing. FML."

but do you not think that if you are with someone you truly love and are living with them ,maybe even possibly engaged to them ,is it still "wrong" to indulge in a bit of bonding time when you know marriage will eventually be on the cards.

cbdee 8

Thx 4the info skittles;)

cbdee 8

Cooter pooter :D

Me and my husband waited till marriage. And no, we both had heaps of chances to get laid. We just didn't. Also, don't tell me to keep my religious views to myself I'm not religious. And also, he didn't end up hurting me because I had an accident when I was twelve and ended up breaking my tailbone (long story). You can be a virgin and not be hurt on your first time. And before all the commenters start, no, my husband is not small down there. So it isn't possible he couldn't have hurt me. And no, it is very easy to rip yourself down there without ever having had sex. Just ask a horse rider. On second thought, don't.

528Alice491 3

Obviously all these ydi comments were made by people who A) don't have sex, or B) have penises too small to trap air in a vagina. Sorry, but it's normal, it happens, and contrary to what seems to be popular belief (society is so stupid...) it's not a "fart". It's air that gets crammed in during sex. Of course if your rinky dinky is too small to cause pressure and trap the air, I guess you're lucky your lady will never queef around you! Probably totally worth it! Lmao

XxconradxX 0

lol that's sux

MaeeFlowers 0

...EWWWWWWWW.

does that make op a cock mungeling queef burger? if she sucks cock and eats at mcdonalds alot that's the perfect definition of her }:)>

FFML_314 11

Your boyfriend is an arsehole.

jazzy_123 20

at least they don't call her Queen LaQueefa!!

That's slightly mortifying.

cooter pooter!!!

edidnt that lady in that orbit commercial call abother lady a cootie queen? haha ew

olisykes_ 0

queen laqueefa

haha good one

numba one suck on that bitches

#5 ur numba 6 u dumbass

7, you fail... hard 

mintcar 9

7, you're so dumb.

Schizomaniac 24

"Number 5, you're number 6..idiot." Hahaha..moron.

how the hell is he number 6 of u called him number 5 you idiot, major fail

vanilla2u 5

#7 epic fail you called him #5 and then said he is #6 you dumbass.

TaylorTotsYumm 10

7, you are so dumb. You are really dumb. Fo' real.

xGet_Over_It 0

#7 was telling #5 that he wasnt first. because #5 claimed that he was the first reply. but #5 is actually #6 so #7 fails either way.

94, haha that guy/video is so hilarious XD

FFML_314 11

What?

dantem8 0

cooter pooter... CLASSIC.

gummibloo 0

Tell everyone he has a small dick then make fun of his ass

not_a_jew_21 0

that's just so awesome!!! cooter pooter!!!