Great handle!

By I'll Make You FartCum - 02/01/2015 21:53 - United States - San Francisco

Spicy
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML
I agree, your life sucks 41 375
You deserved it 9 117

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Top comments

homesuckfucker 28

I'm sorry your girlfriend would be so disrespectful. Things that happen in an intimate situation should remain intimate. Did you let her know it makes you uncomfortable? Communication is important in a relationship, after all. Perhaps she could convince your friends to stop. If not, they'll forget about it once it stops being entertaining. Pretend it doesn't bother you! Play along with it! That's how you shake off elementary school bullies, and they seem to be at about that level of maturity.

LaColombianita 26

Lmao that's hilarious, but I definitely would have kept that as an inside joke between the 2 of you only..

Comments

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

But make best of the situation

The Mandarin says "and you'll never hear me coming"

PokeyPorcupine 18

That's seriously funny.! Smile and take it in stride.

I think it's a good nickname

It's funny, as long as it isn't you

There could be worse ways to earn that nickname.

Should have played it cool and ask her to bring you a beer right after.

Nolimit2217 32

Why be embarrassed? You're a man, we both cum and fart.. Sometimes at the same time!

Not that other people should know about it. Especially if it happened at an inopportune time like sex.

homesuckfucker 28

I'm sorry your girlfriend would be so disrespectful. Things that happen in an intimate situation should remain intimate. Did you let her know it makes you uncomfortable? Communication is important in a relationship, after all. Perhaps she could convince your friends to stop. If not, they'll forget about it once it stops being entertaining. Pretend it doesn't bother you! Play along with it! That's how you shake off elementary school bullies, and they seem to be at about that level of maturity.

tehdarkness 21

Dude, they hadn't has sex in a month. Something's not right.

Maybe one of them has been away for work or vacation, or one of them was really sick for awhile..

homesuckfucker 28

Sex is not everything in a relationship. My girlfriend and I are very much in love and don't get to have sex very often. Now, there is a possibility that OP's girlfriend is losing interest. I'm not denying that. But it's wrong to make false assumptions. There are a number of reasons why they might not have had sex, and disinterest is just one.

Guys spill everything to their mates. It's hardly ridiculous to expect a girl to return the favour.

homesuckfucker 28

I personally think what happens in the bedroom should STAY in the bedroom, unless you're fishing for someone to join in.

"Ignore it or play along" doesn't work with elementary school bullies or male friends. This girl could well have gotten OP labeled "CumFart" for the rest of his life. I've got a friend that has been called by his embarrassing high school nickname so long it was on his wedding invitations.

homesuckfucker 28

We obviously keep different company. :/

I find it hilarious that homesuckfucker is so in touch with his inner side and is explaining the benefits of communication in a relationship.. Just go homesuckfucker.. Lmao

homesuckfucker 28

I apologize if my screen name leads you to a false conclusion regarding my personality and level of intellect.

homesuckfucker 28

Wait. My "inner side"? What the hell?

I feel ya OP. Some people are just tactless...

19990231 29

What happens in vagina stays in vagina.

brasiliano 16

You sir just won the internet for today.

Technically the fart happened outside of the vagina.

LaColombianita 26

Lmao that's hilarious, but I definitely would have kept that as an inside joke between the 2 of you only..

I think it should be pointed out that is not what a cumfart is.

Do I even want to know? Do any of us even really want to know? Still somebody will Google it. Just keep a bucket or trashcan nearby for when you Google it.

krystenk93 23

#22, There is always Urban Dictionary for stuff like this!

ChevyLovzYou2 21

It's when after a guy shoots his load into a girl's butt, she farts the semen out... gross right?

You just HAD to go and share that, didn't you #48. I WAS enjoying my breakfast....

71 extra glaze for those cinnamon rolls?

Someone had to explain it! :D

Blew two loads.