Today, my boyfriend started laughing during sex because my boobs are slightly different. He then broke up with me after I pointed out that his nuts aren't exactly even either. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Today, my boyfriend compared my boobs to a flat tire. FML
Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML
Small comforts
Today, while having sex, my boyfriend admitted to having an affair. To comfort me, he said, "But you have bigger boobs, so you have nothing to worry about." FML
Today, my boyfriend kept jiggling my fat rolls while we were cuddling. I was annoyed, and I told him he could at least go for my boobs instead. He instantly replied, "But these are bigger..." FML
Today, my boyfriend started talking to my breasts in public. As if that wasn't bad enough, he then started to jiggle them in his hands. FML
Let down
Today, my boyfriend saw my boobs for the first time. His reaction was, "Well that's... disappointing". FML
Weird reason, but OK
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because of our differing skin tones. The contrast weirds him out during sex. FML
Today, it's official, we measured. My boyfriend's manboobs are bigger than my breasts. FML
Valid reason
Today, after having sex with my boyfriend for the first time, he told me he wanted to break up. He told me my orgasm face wasn't something he could put up with. FML
Today, I was depressed because my boobs are really small for a 20 year old woman. To make me feel better my boyfriend said, "As long as they're bigger than mine." They weren't. FML
Top comments
The_Hitdude 12
Hypocrisy at it's finest.
toenibbler 14
One does not simply joke about other peoples' private parts, it generally ends badly.
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Comments (232)
greenwich1945 13
What a douche.
spazz666 18
#32 good luck with the ladies, you stud, you. On a serious note, why should she change her body just because some asshat complained about it? I'm sure OP can find someone who loves her body the way it is and wouldn't ask her to have extremely expensive and completely vain surgery for his enjoyment. If she had back problems because of the size of her chest size then it would be a useful thing to do, but just because they're not even? Grow up.
SlackerEmeritus 13
And nothing of value was lost judging by his unbelievably childish reaction.
HellfirePrince 3
Well i think its quite obvious that not only is he a hypocrite but he can't take his own heat! He also didn't seem to like that you had quick wit and observation skills. He wasn't worth you're time love, find someone who will be with you and like you for who and what you are! He will catch his much needed ass kicking/STD soon enough.
ddddddddg 9
No ones testicles ore breasts are perfectly symmetrical
Calyx_fml 22
Is he nuts?
slysendice 3
The funny thing here is that nuts aren't supposed to be even. If they were, it would cause enough friction for them not to function properly. Learned this in high school health class.
joeg16_04 1
U guys are just too sensitive!
happymom2g 0
He's an ass you deserve better.
missnuthin 10
you're better off without him.