Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He swore it wouldn't be 2 minutes long this time. He was right. It was 3 minutes. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML
Today, I received a text from my boyfriend telling me how much I wore him out the night before, from all the sex we were having. We had sex for two minutes. FML
Today, my boyfriend got really excited that he'd broken his own record; he can now last a full 2 minutes in bed. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML
Today, I finally had sex with a coworker I’d been flirting with for nearly 2 and half years. The sex lasted less than 2 and a half minutes. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML
Today, after 6 months of sex, my boyfriend showered himself with praise for managing, for the first time ever, to stretch the act out to a full minute. FML
Today, I finally had sex with my husband and orgasmed. Three hours apart from each other. FML
Today, my girlfriend were having sex. When I finished, she whispered in my ear, "30 seconds." FML
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been seeing. It took him longer to put the condom on than it did to finish. FML
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Top comments
Cavebone 5
that's a solid 50% improvement.
DalPozzo13 10
That's sad, my dog has gotten it on with a pillow longer than that haha
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Comments (229)
EduJav321 24
Practice makes perfect!
badam_fml 6
Give him another chance
SamLiveFree_77 9
3rd Time is a charm OP. Go for it.
pandm101 0
Foreplay foreplay foreplay.
capnbzarr 43
YDI. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
Bozone 7
That does not fit this situation . Shush up .
capnbzarr 43
Sure it does. She was fooled into having sex with him once, and discovered he's no good at it. So, having chosen to have sex with him again after that first disappointment, she's foolish to expect any better the next time. It must suck to have to have people explain simple shit to you all the time, huh?
punisher1385 2
Maybe he should squeeze one out before he tries to get it in... He'll at least last long
geod69 8
At least he went past the 2 minute warning mark
psychiatrist_fml 4
Well... At least it's progress right?
tony50 0
Next time will be 4 mins. Keep up the work.
darkknightdj 0
Is your ****** that good ??? 0.0
thatsmylyfe 13
Thats what i was thinking