Today, my boss captured a huge spider and put it in a jar on the desk in our shop. He's named it Fluffy and is threatening to fire me if I harm it. I'm horribly arachnophobic and we share that desk. FML
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By
perdix
| 29
In this economy, you should be much more out-of-work-phobic, so sort your phobias out and deal with the little bug in the glass (and hope it doesn't escape, heh-heh-heh.)
Or get some old lady to swallow it. I don't know why.
Or get some old lady to swallow it. I don't know why.
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syki
| 22
Oh, we know why she swallowed the spider. The question is, why did she swallow the fly?
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Alphakhiash
| 13
Perhaps she'll die.
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Palirose
| 22
This particular comment brought back a lot of old elementary school memories. .____.
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MormonPornstar
| 7
Woah, you telling me there's no word for out-of-work-phobia, Perdix? Looks like you have an assignment.
Your mission, should you choose to accept...
Your mission, should you choose to accept...
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Meettitan
| 14
Take this as an opportunity to examine your irrational fear (we all have one) and try to get used to it.
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mikeofthunder
| 13
My irrational fear is ostracanophobia (fear of shellfish - particularly lobsters) yet, working in a beach-side cafe, we serve them for lunch and I put it to side whilst I'm working. Unless they're alive.. Then I'm getting the fuck outta there 0.o
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deathhill3
| 40
#24, Not everyone has an irrational fear. Sometimes people develop a fear for a genuine reason (e.g. get attacked by a dog at a very young age, and therefore become scared of dogs) and some people just don't have any fears.
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ariachan_fml
| 3
23 - phobia of working is ergasiophobia....
Latin for no is non
Nongasiophobia?
Latin for no is non
Nongasiophobia?
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ariachan_fml
| 3
Actually its a derivitive or ergon which is greek...
So ochergoniphobia :D
So ochergoniphobia :D
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patrickalamo
| 47
1. But I heard, she was dead of course.
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perdix
| 29
#47, no, the lyrics are "I think she'll die." She's not dead yet!
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GypsyRover
| 0
Lmao! I'm SO sorry,but #30 looks like Corky from that show life goes on.
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syki
| 22
She's not dead until she eats the horse. It's a slippery slope.
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Clioo_fml
| 17
What I don't get is why he named it Fluffy....is a spider, not a three-headed dog. Aragog should fit it more nicely...
By
sirsquab
| 12
Why do you hate spiders? Most of them are harmless and they kill mosquitoes and other bugs. They're quite helpful.
Kidding. Seriously, fuck spiders.
Kidding. Seriously, fuck spiders.
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fleur_de_fevrier_fml
| 22
That's just silly, spiders are indeed very useful insects. I have a bad case of arachnophobia but still don't want to eradicate them.
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Tidus0
| 17
The phobia has meaning in Australia where many species of spider are deadly...same goes for snakes, jellyfish, octopus and our harmful rays (both sun and sting)
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goose12321
| 11
51- spiders are Arachnids, not insects, hence 8 legs, not of 6.
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momolee
| 4
It can get inside you hair, nose, ear, cloths, shoes, or in your food. You will have hard time getting it out. They're gross and might bite you or lay eggs.That's why I have fear of insects in general.
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Levvy
| 22
Spiders aren't insects. They belong to class arachnida, not class insecta.
Now to wait for the thumbs-down for saying something about spiders besides a squeal of "Eee-uuuw!"
Now to wait for the thumbs-down for saying something about spiders besides a squeal of "Eee-uuuw!"
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kitkewl
| 1
Too bad they're not insects.
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NomNomMuffin
| 5
Reminds me of Rubeus Hagrid...
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avaloncode
| 8
this comment made my day
By
jsl6728
| 2
Ha! That sounds funny. I like spiders.
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Dixbfloppin
| 11
I respect your opinion about spiders.
No, not really. There is something seriously wrong with people who enjoy having spiders as company.
No, not really. There is something seriously wrong with people who enjoy having spiders as company.
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UberNova
| 18
I kinda like spiders too, I find phobias pathetic tbh. Phobia = Scared, Being scared = cowardice
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DjeePee
| 24
Why? What's wrong with liking an azaming animal that can do you no harm? Thinking about it, a dog is way more dangerous than a normal spider. But, ow yes, I forgot. They are fluffy and cute and spiders are not, therefore, they deserve to be hated, feared and killed.
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Hiimhaileypotter
| 52
25- People who have phobias can't control them, dumbass. Usually therapy is needed to help; it's not something that can be fixed with "confidence." Quit judging.
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RussianFox
| 13
Hilarious how much of the FML community hates spiders just by thumbing down comments associating with liking spiders.
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mpalmiter
| 0
#29, Do you no harm? I got bit by a spider a few years ago and nearly died. I still will not let myself be afraid of them but some can harm you.
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chell1894
| 13
29 all spiders carry venom except about 4. A lot of spiders venom just isn't lethal. It just causes swelling, soreness, or itchiness. But there are a LOT of lethal spiders out there. Just about anywhere you live had at least 2 deadly spiders. Lethal spiders have spread a lot because of shipping fruits and vegetables. But yes I do agree there is nothing wrong with liking spiders. I find spiders absolutely fascinating. Well just about any animal. But I do not want to cuddle up with one or see them crawling around my house.
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mpalmiter
| 0
#43- I used to be horrified of both snakes and spiders to the point that it completely controlled my life. I had to go on anxiety medicine. I got sick of being constantly afraid and decided to face my fears head on. Saying one can't help it is wrong. We tend to fear the unknown.
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Levvy
| 22
#54: It's just hive mind mentality. "They don't do as I do and think as I think? Punish!" It's exactly the same mentality that causes people to form inexplicable group loyalties and group hatreds over banal crud utterly unrelated to them like what types of cellphones people buy. It's one thing to argue, "Your thinking is incorrect, here's why." It's quite another to rear back and hiss at the mere existence of an opinion less closed-minded than one's own.
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ambowew
| 7
The people who don't believe in a spiders prowess at being venomous should look up the recluse spiders bite.
Utterly delicious.
Utterly delicious.
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SilverInGray
| 25
25, being scared is not cowardice. Courage is being scared and doing something anyway. Cowardice is being scared and allowing that to control you.
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UberNova
| 18
43 - So basically, people can't help but be scared and just because they can't help it, it doesn't mean they aren't a coward with respect to the object of their phobia.
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UberNova
| 18
82- "Courage (is referred as bravery, boldness, fearlessness, mettle, fortitude, or intrepidity)" note the "fearlessness".
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SilverInGray
| 25
84, people who are fearless are stupid and take unnecessary risks. You can be brave and scared at the same time.
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UberNova
| 18
87- You are making a massive assumption there, you are saying that people without fears are stupid and put themselves in dangerous situations, meaning that they do not think logically.
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MlleMC_fml
| 19
A phobia and a fear are really different things. For example, I have a phobia of vomit, and while I logically can't understand how vomit would be scary (especially when it's something like morning sickness, which is in no way contagious), my body doesn't say the same... As soon as I hear a noise that sounds like someone's gonna vomit, I really start to panic, and then I can't think of anything else (while it's the only way to fight the panic). By definition, a phobia is irrational, so even if you try fighting it, you might not succeed without proper therapy.
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UberNova
| 18
"A *phobia* (from the Greek
: φόβος, "Phóbos
", meaning "fear" or "morbid fear") is a type of anxiety disorder
, usually defined as a persistent fear of an object or situation".
: φόβος, "Phóbos
", meaning "fear" or "morbid fear") is a type of anxiety disorder
, usually defined as a persistent fear of an object or situation".
Reply
Levvy
| 22
Thank you for proving my point, folks. "He doesn't share my by-definition irrational fear? BURN THE HERETIC! To think differently is forbidden!"
By
ee13lbp
| 4
Won't the spider die anyway if it's just stuck in the jar all day with no food?
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sirsquab
| 12
Air holesin the lid?
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failbeast
| 3
So OP boss is most likely gonna feed it.. Not like he would leave a live spider in a jar to die
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Posthuman
| 26
"And this is my spider. Piss me off, and you're his lunch."
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bioboy725
| 10
7, spiders need more to eat than just air. The holes in the lid wouldn't do shit to help with starvation.
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snowboarder531
| 5
I captured a black widow in a bottle once. It lived for about three weeks without food. Spiders are demons.
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ee13lbp
| 4
If I found a black widow the first thing I'd do is kill it. *shudders*
By
zandalee
| 19
I agree ^ it's only a matter of time before its dead. Hang on in there OP!
By
hotshot2626
| 9
Don't worry they don't eat much...
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gc327072
| 29
Only souls and small children.
By
Pretty_Pink_Lady
| 10
Time to hire a hit-man to do the job for you. Or at least a spider-napper.
Reply
s0m3guy2010
| 21
Or maybe if you combined the two, you could get Spiderman to do it.
By
d_unsub
| 12
You don't need to harm it, just make it disappear.
By
Grimmerie
| 31
Get a frog and allow it to accidentally consume the spider. You're innocent, the frog did all your dirty work.
Although, isn't it better that the spider is in a secure containment facility, rather than crawling unhindered about the office?
Although, isn't it better that the spider is in a secure containment facility, rather than crawling unhindered about the office?
By
ambowew
| 7
Is your boss a half-giant and goes by the name of Hagrid, perhaps?
Kidding. Seriously, fuck spiders.
Or get some old lady to swallow it. I don't know why.