We don't let FML teach us things, otherwise we'd never be able to entertain each other.

Yes OP, next time just grow a pair and talk to her. That alone will impress her more than you climbing.

Spin in: Tell her you fell for her. (Literally and figuratively...)

You mean we're supposed to learn from these things??

Haven't you been on the Internet lately, #13? Tumblr says talking to women in public is sexual harassment.

The fart was the cherry on top of a bad decision sundae.

I mean... it says "I had my equipment on" that would make me think he had the harness on.

#6: On the other hand, falling to the floor and breaking your arm suggests otherwise...

#2,#31, the way I imagine this is that he had his harness on and he jumped from the floor to try to start higher, missed and then landed funny on his arm causing the break. Can't blame a belayer for someone basically falling from the ground and breaking an arm.

A lot of climbing gyms will allow what's called "bouldering." Either there is a dedicated area with short features, or there's a limit as to how high climbers can go on the main walls, but a harness/belay isn't required when bouldering. (A harness is still helpful if you have a chalk bag that you want with you.) In the bouldering-specific areas there isn't even a place to affix belaying equipment. But even a padded floor will break bones if you land awkwardly.

I don't know how people can rock climb. I would literally crap my pants if I did that.

I was wearing a harness but I was bouldering. that's the thing-no balayer

At least with the increasing severity of events, I doubt anyone remembered / heard your fart, OP!

No, it was... depressed.

I have to give it to u #28. U actually made "break" into laughter

Right? The hardest climb "IN THE GYM".

10, you should go to a dedicated climbing gym. If you can still move your fingers after an hour, come back here and let us know how it was.

Some gyms are harder than most mountains.

Real rocks are definitely more realistic and useful and actually easier. I swear they make those gyms so difficult. It's next to impossible to hold onto those hand holds and sometimes you actually have to pull yourself with your arms which you shouldn't have to do. Real rocks are way better and they don't wobble.