By MyNameIsNotJeff - 08/05/2015 03:23 - United States

Today, my girlfriend bought me a pet tarantula. I now have one of my biggest fears crawling around my house. FML
I agree, your life sucks 32 212
You deserved it 3 106

Same thing different taste

Top comments

I would thank her for that and kindly mention your fear of spiders, and ask to get another pet together.


spidey widey coming out of hiding gonna eat your faceeee.

Isn't anyone else curious as to why OP's name is "My name is not Jeff" ?

Badkarma4u 17

Go to vine you'll find out quickly

Could be a reference to Channing Tatums character in the film "she's the man" who has a massive fear of spiders. Channing Tatum was the one who said "My names Jeff" in 22 Jump Street.

there is a advertisement in germany about a sex Website and the guy who gets all the women has this phrase "Jeff my namens Jeff" could be a explanation too

There's only one spider i know named jeff, and he is a giant mutant who hangs around a round nosed idiot, a scary girl and a bag of bones.

108 - Mandy isn't scary she's just misunde- no, wait, you're right... that girl was scary as hell

deathstar3548 14
deathstar3548 14

yeah don't mine my comment, my friend took my phone and attempted to type it quick hence it auto corrected to britches lol

I guess you consider yourself a friend...

All about the temperament. I had a black Brazilian that was as sweet as a kitten, but of course it just depends on the particular tarantula. If you don't hold it, it'll flick hairs at you or even hiss.* *Which is why I'd never get a Goliath bird-eater or blue electric, the hissing scares the **** outta me.

My mom has a Chilean rose tarantula named itsy, and she is totally non aggressive. However, it is still mean to bring a spider into the house of someone afraid of spiders.

I guess my comment was more directed at the exact phrase "good pet" because you could say that it's mean to bring dogs into a house with a dog hater, but they're still good pets. I dunno, I wasn't really trying to argue with #5. Just putting out the perspective of an actual arachnophile. :)

Spiders can hiss?! I'm suddenly feeling very safe in the UK...

So can cockroaches. ;) Be thankful you don't live in Australia. Everything hisses down under.

I would thank her for that and kindly mention your fear of spiders, and ask to get another pet together.

Redoxx_fml 22

Maybe it'll bite you and you'll get superpowers...or it'll just hurt a lot

That kindof reminded me of the FML of the little kid who put the spider in the microwave and tried to make it bite him so he'd get superpowers. Anyone? No? Just me?

Why would you're girlfriend buy you something you're afraid of? Make her find it! Those things mean death!!

Not tarantulas, usually the larger the spider the less deadly. There's never been a case of death from a tarantula bite that I know of. And if you are careful and gentle it most likely won't hurt you. There's a lot of people with them as pets.

The biggest problem with spider bites is an infection from not taking care of the wound or if you're allergic to the venom. OP, if you're afraid then don't keep it, your going to give that animal a bad life. Tell her to take it back to the pet store or to rehome it (or if it's native, to release it again)

hes not being literal, to someone whos extremely afraid, the terror is death! haha

they do not mean death. they dont hurt people

The best way to get over your fear is to face it! Anyway good luck