By screamo - 02/05/2009 20:44 - United Kingdom

Today, my alarm went off at 6.30. I woke up disorientated, as usual. I looked up and saw a dark, mysterious figure entering my room. Still half asleep, I screamed and dived under my covers. The dark, mysterious figure was my mom. I'm a 21 year old guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks 21 857
You deserved it 46 785
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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 03/01/2010 16:35 - United States

Today, I was lying in bed, staring at the ceiling with the lights off. It was 1AM, and I'd just finished watching a scary movie, so I was a little paranoid. I was about to fall asleep, when an eerie light lit the room. I jumped, got tangled in the sheets, and hit my head against the bed frame. Where'd the light come from? Not a space ship. Not someone breaking in. It was my phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks 10 559
You deserved it 29 176
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Top comments

mogan_fml 0

dang. i wish i had a big, strapping young man like you around my house.

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trevorus 0

You're one of them manly men, aren't you? Hehe...

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Comments

suckstobeyou3 0

we need two more buttons: 'thats f-ing awesome!' and 'LMAO!' thats f-ing awesome that your mom is part ninja and LMAO! because thats just hilarious. was your scream at least semi-manly? XD

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annabananaxx 0

@4 My cousin goes to a college near his house and instead of paying money to rent an apartment, he lives with his mom. Hilarious fml though :')

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onigiriqueen 0

You woke up "disoriented" and then you "dove" under the covers, you mean? Grammar fail.

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G_Bug 0

haha dark mysterious figure, are you a comic book fan? i like it i like it

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crownme 0

Wow grow some coconuts bro lol nah jk

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ohcrapitsme 0

For those that live at home with your mom: Just don't make it last till your 40. Other than that, I think it's fine :) (No offense to those who actually do and are 40) I serioulsy snorted at this FML I laughed so hard. It's cute :) and for all the grammer nazis - get a life, and become an English teacher. :D

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MaddieMonster 0

Haha I can understand that as I am also out of it that early, I'm also on a bus that early to. (FML) note: Either dove or dived is acceptable as the past tense of dive. Usage preferences show regional distribution, although both forms are heard throughout the United States. According to the Dictionary of American Regional English, in the North, dove is more prevalent; in the South Midland, dived.

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Chris968 0

I would too dude. My dad told me when I was a kid he was going to hide in my closet and come out and scare me when I went to sleep and when I visit my parents I still check my closet because it scared me that much.

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ely46 0

Not everyone is brave when they are half asleep. I once woke up to shouting outside of my bedroom window. I reached under my bed to grab my pistol. I had it in my hand and was sitting up when I realized that it was the police arresting someone that had ran behind my apartment complex. The cops were the men outside of my window yelling to the guy to get on the ground. I was glad that the cops could not see me and that I had pulled a gun on them. People do stupid shit while only half awake.

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