Today, it's the 6th day that we have been snowed in. We haven't...

By Sky - 16/1/2017 22:00

Today, it's the 6th day that we have been snowed in. We haven't left the house, because we can't. I've done at least 30 hours of Legos. FML

I agree, your life sucks

6898

You deserved it

619

Favorite

Oh, hai!

Alexa, play "Paranoid" by Black Sabbath

Business savvy

By BejeweledJizz - 5/11/2016 12:29

Today, after weeks of being addicted to Bejeweled Blitz, I couldn't stop thinking about it while having sex with my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks

8799

You deserved it

4738

Favorite

By Anonymous - 1/12/2010 10:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to take a short cut driving through the snow. I skidded to avoid an oncoming car and ended up in someone's garden, inches from their brand new extension. The house belonged to a police officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10307

You deserved it

31776

Favorite

By Anonymous - 10/6/2015 13:26 - United Kingdom

Today, I asked my boss for a couple of days off to recover from a nasty ear infection which has left me hard of hearing. However, he didn't understand why that would affect my job and refused. I work in a telephone call centre. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30014

You deserved it

1932

Favorite

By horriblefashionsense - 26/9/2013 15:20 - United States - Winter Garden

Today, I went in the diner I always pass by and ordered a sandwich. When I asked how much it was, the waitress replied, "Don't worry, honey. We give free meals to the homeless on Thursdays." I was too ashamed to deny it, so I just said thank you and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks

47443

You deserved it

6231

Favorite

By Anonymous - 16/6/2012 19:03 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, my sister asked me if I was going to be getting married "for real" this time, because she didn't want to waste her money like she did on my previous engagement. The reason that one didn't work out in the first place is because she slept with my fiancé. FML

I agree, your life sucks

51242

You deserved it

2530

Favorite

By Anonymous - 3/12/2012 18:39 - Australia - Perth

Today, my boyfriend discovered how to make me queef on demand when he has his fingers inside me. I now feel like my love life has been replaced with fart sounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36545

You deserved it

4394

Favorite

By ktreens - 19/10/2012 04:06 - Canada - Brandon

Today, I was getting out of the car when I saw a dark figure approaching me from behind a shed. I screamed and threw my bag. It also threw its bag, due to the fact that it was my shadow on the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9748

You deserved it

26256

Favorite

By DwarvenWalrus - 16/8/2017 01:30

Today, I was at the water park in Disney World when I felt something run down my leg. I thought that I just hadn't dried off all the way, but when I looked down, there was diarrhea running out of my shorts. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4332

You deserved it

674

Favorite

By she knows - 8/10/2013 16:30 - United States - Honolulu

Today, I was at my in-laws' house, and as I was walking to the living room I had my hands on the back of my hips supporting my back. My mother-in-law told me to stop because it makes me look pregnant. I'm 9 months pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks

53042

You deserved it

3264

Favorite

By Anonymous - 9/10/2012 08:38 - United States - Murrieta

Today, I noticed that my penis looks tiny in my girlfriend's hands. Without thinking, I pointed it out to her. Now she thinks I have a small cock, and I think she has man-hands. Either way, we're both turned off. FML

I agree, your life sucks

16048

You deserved it

36606

Favorite

By Anonymous - 14/7/2009 18:03 - Spain

Today, I went to a restaurant for lunch. The waiter brought some bread and I started eating it as I waited for him to take my order. When he approached me he looked at me and said, "Don't eat too much bread honey. It'll make you fatter." Not fat, fatter. I never thought of myself as fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks

46966

You deserved it

7006

Favorite

By x_o - 4/8/2013 20:51 - Hungary - ?ttev?ny

Today, it was my first day at my new job. I had to break up two fistfights, then leave work early with a black eye. This is not what I had in mind when I applied to work at a retirement home. FML

I agree, your life sucks

53106

You deserved it

3840

Favorite

By hwood - 9/9/2009 16:53 - United States

Today, my Grandmother was sent to the ER. My family blamed it on her being allergic to my cats, making me feel guilty. She just called me to tell me the test results informed her that she is actually allergic to the carrot cake they got her. I gave my cats away 15 minutes ago to a little girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks

46347

You deserved it

8162

Favorite

By randomjulz - 16/6/2011 03:53 - United States

Today, my husband asked me to come see his turd. After saying no, he said, "What kind of wife are you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks

38138

You deserved it

9930

Favorite

By Anonymous - 13/5/2009 20:15 - Canada

Today, I woke up after a night of partying and went to the bathroom. That’s when I realized that after passing out with my shoes on last night, my friends decided use a black sharpie and play “connect the dots” with my acne. FML

I agree, your life sucks

44623

You deserved it

19916

Favorite

By vballqt201 - 21/6/2009 16:03 - United States

Today, I was asking my one year old nephew what noises certain animals make. I decided to trick him and ask him what sound I make. He immediately says, "MOOOO". FML

I agree, your life sucks

40307

You deserved it

17227

Favorite

By haunted - 24/11/2011 20:30 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking to the kitchen in the dark. Something caught my eye and I turned to see a man standing in the corner, clear as day. I jumped and closed my eyes for a split second. When I opened them, he was nowhere to be seen. I'm now terrified to live in my own home. FML

I agree, your life sucks

51464

You deserved it

4802

Favorite

By BlueMacaw - 25/7/2016 14:38 - United States - Edmond

Today, at church, I sneezed suddenly and messily into my hand just as the priest asked us to stand and greet our neighbors with a handshake. FML

I agree, your life sucks

14550

You deserved it

2121

Favorite

By yeah - 17/7/2015 14:59 - United States - Eugene

Today, I got in trouble for missing my shift. According to my idiot boss, "Crashes don't just happen." FML

I agree, your life sucks

28632

You deserved it

1942

Favorite

By lct722 - 16/3/2012 05:54 - Canada

Today, I panicked when I saw a spider on my shoulder from the corner of my eye. It was a birthmark. The same one that has been there for the last 23 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10745

You deserved it

23109

Favorite

By Anonymous - 21/4/2009 21:52 - United States

Today, I was at my senior dance dancing with this guy I really like. He was telling me how he likes a strong woman who's not afraid to make the first move. Empowered by what he said, I asked him out. He said no because he thinks girls shouldn't ask guys out. FML

I agree, your life sucks

67882

You deserved it

5065

Favorite

By so embarrassed - 5/1/2013 21:56 - United States - South Salem

Today, I was at a restaurant with my boyfriend. He wound up drinking a whole bottle of wine, and when the bill came he drunkenly yelled at the waiter, claiming it should be free, because he's in the military "fighting for your freedom". He's a mechanic in the National Guard. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27930

You deserved it

4261

Favorite

By Anonymous - 21/7/2015 17:50 - India - Bangalore

Today, I was trying to work out, and couldn't even complete an exercise regime meant for 50-year-olds. I'm 24. FML

I agree, your life sucks

24794

You deserved it

8231

Favorite

By yanksbitethebig1 - 16/3/2009 01:09 - United States

Today, I heard back from my store management interview at Target. I was offered an overnight stock clerk position. When I called HR to find out if my application was in the wrong file I was told I lack the leadership qualities necessary for Target. I graduated with honors from a military school. FML

I agree, your life sucks

83895

You deserved it

6103

Favorite

By curvster daughter - 2/11/2013 18:46 - United States

Today, like every other day, my daughter thinks that degrading skinny people is very "non-conformist" and "edgy". This time, though, a slightly slim girl punched her in the face when she accused her of being anorexic. Now people think I gave my daughter her new black eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks

44234

You deserved it

6910

Favorite

By Thoughtless Wife - 18/6/2017 14:00

Today, my sister-in-law announced on Facebook that I did nothing for my husband's birthday. I'd just had major surgery, and I'm not allowed to drive or do much. We had a small party - just us and the kids - but didn't invite anyone over. I guess not inviting her meant we did nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4537

You deserved it

231

Favorite

By afraidtosleep - 13/10/2012 06:35 - United States - Houston

Today, as I was rushing to get out for work, I opened my door just in time to witness a large snake slither into my home. I had no choice but to lock it inside and go to work. I've now spent several hours searching for it with my friends, and we can't find it. I'm scared to go to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28838

You deserved it

6295

Favorite

By wildthing - 1/7/2009 19:33 - United States

Today, my mother woke me up by saying "Good morning my sexually aggressive daughter. We're going to have an extremely uncomfortable conversation today." Our awkward talk consisted of her telling me that I'm a tease and am going to get raped. Why? She caught me making out with my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks

75294

You deserved it

7180

Favorite

By Anonymous - 30/8/2019 16:01

Today, I've been on the verge of throwing up all day. Why? My dog is intolerant to grain, but grain-free dog food causes heart problems so she can't have that. Now our lives are filled with nasty farts and Hershey squirts with no end in sight. It's a rough time for us both. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1293

You deserved it

245

Favorite

By FunFun in the Sun - 16/3/2016 14:51 - Dominican Republic - Santo Domingo

Today, I'm on spring break on a tropical island, visiting family I hadn't seen in years. They invited me out to eat, and won't take no for an answer. All of this would be wonderful, if it weren't for the fact that I've been vomiting to the point of expelling bile and dry heaving for the last two days. FML

I agree, your life sucks

18149

You deserved it

1289

Favorite

By Anonymous - 18/6/2013 00:27 - United States - San Jose

Today, I started my new job as a cashier for a drugstore. As I scanned some children's medicine for a family, I gave the girl a tissue because her nose was running. Later, my boss sat me down and told me there had been a complaint about a "female pedo-employee". I'm the only woman working there. FML

I agree, your life sucks

45709

You deserved it

2746

Favorite

By HylianFox - 27/1/2012 04:07 - United States

Today, my parents had a long discussion on whether a cut on my arm looked like a vagina. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29999

You deserved it

3038

Favorite

By Username - 6/10/2010 21:59 - France

Today, I was telling my boyfriend about how self conscious I am and how I obsess about my weight. He said, "Don't be ridiculous, you don't need to lose that much weight." FML

I agree, your life sucks

18947

You deserved it

28594

Favorite

By watersport - 10/3/2010 17:56 - United States

Today, I woke up because I really had to pee. I got out of bed, went to the bathroom and went back to bed. Or so I thought. I did pee, but I only dreamed that I got out of bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks

34009

You deserved it

4289

Favorite

By stickyandwet - 30/1/2017 23:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, 3 hours into a 7-hour flight, I only ate half the chocolate mousse that came with my meal and decided to give the rest to my boyfriend. While reaching for his tray, he mistook the action as me stealing his mousse. We spent the rest of the flight covered in sticky soft drink splatter. FML

I agree, your life sucks

5718

You deserved it

857

Favorite

By Anonymous - 20/9/2018 03:00

Today, after years of telling my boyfriend I don't do anal, I agreed to try it once just to get him to stop whining about it. He was so gung-ho that he tried to force it in without doing enough "relaxing preparation" and he split the muscle around my ring. Now I need surgery. FML

I agree, your life sucks

5819

You deserved it

851

Favorite

By Anonymous - 9/9/2015 18:54 - United States - Decatur

Today, I drove across two states to see my brother, who's had a history of heart problems. My mother had sent me a long e-mail saying he was on his death bed and wanted to talk to me to "get his affairs in order." When I arrived worriedly, he was fine. My mother guilt-tripped me to come visit. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25581

You deserved it

3641

Favorite

By Anonymous - 21/3/2016 21:26 - United States - Depew

Today, I parked my car in the company lot and walked down the street to a mandatory company training. While I was at the training, everyone back at the office decided to leave early and locked the company lot. My car is now stuck there for the night and I'm walking home. FML

I agree, your life sucks

19784

You deserved it

1465

Favorite

By lurna301 - 17/7/2012 00:58 - United States - Glendale

Today, my boyfriend's mother introduced me as his "friend". We've been together for 10 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31590

You deserved it

3224

Favorite

By micheal - 21/6/2011 16:52 - United States

Today, while I was delivering pizza in the torrential downpour, I waited 5 minutes in the pouring rain for an old lady to dig 20 bucks out of her purse. Her total was $19.99. She told me to keep the change and make lots of money. FML

I agree, your life sucks

38662

You deserved it

3528

Favorite

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By organizse | 28

#7390154 - Monday 16 January 2017 22:03

Are you a master builder yet?

By RichardPencil | 28

#7390156 - Monday 16 January 2017 22:05

Is this site FML or Fantasy Island?

Comments

By organizse | 28

#7390154 - Monday 16 January 2017 22:03

Are you a master builder yet?

By RichardPencil | 28

#7390156 - Monday 16 January 2017 22:05

Is this site FML or Fantasy Island?

By WallyQ | 18

#7390200 - Monday 16 January 2017 23:20

Sounds like a perfect way to spend time off...

By tipsyone | 20

#7390205 - Monday 16 January 2017 23:24

So what's wrong?

By samwilliams800 | 28

#7390213 - Monday 16 January 2017 23:30

Nothing wrong with legos

By jcash52426 | 5

#7390234 - Tuesday 17 January 2017 0:01

Legos are cool embrace your inner child and build something big and cool looking.

By carey2 | 0

#7390238 - Tuesday 17 January 2017 0:11

How is that FML Legos rock....

By cacheson | 40

#7390240 - Tuesday 17 January 2017 0:16

That sounds pretty awesome to me! I'd like to spend some time doing nothing but building Legos...

By Chazzster | 20

#7390287 - Tuesday 17 January 2017 1:32

Doe not sound like a problem to me!

By jjandrus | 4

#7390305 - Tuesday 17 January 2017 2:49

Can't say you deserved it, it can't agree your life sucks either ?