Love: Today, I woke up with a black eye. Why? My husband was having...

By DravensMommy - 06/08/2009 19:22 - United States

Today, I woke up with a black eye. Why? My husband was having a dream where he was fighting somebody and wound up punching me in the face in his sleep. I had a very important job interview this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 539

You deserved it 3 008

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 11/08/2013 18:11 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I had a dream in which I was being mugged. I started fighting the muggers off, while in reality, my fist smacked my wife in the face. Now she has a black eye, nobody believes my story, and they think I'm a wife beater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 402

You deserved it 5 959

Explain this

By Jenny - 16/01/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, my husband smacked me quite hard, and I have a black eye as a result. It's not a case of a domestic abuse, it was 100% unintended because he was sleeping and had a really bad dream that made him swing his arm. He's feeling bad about it, and I would laugh it off, but I have an important meeting tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 623

You deserved it 86

Nightmare mode

By oliver - 27/01/2016 12:02 - United States

Today, I woke up with a pounding headache. My wife tells me that last night I woke up from a nightmare, screaming, tried to run away, and knocked myself out running headfirst into the bedroom wall. So she put me back to bed and went back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 512

You deserved it 2 256

By Secretlypossessed - 29/10/2018 03:00

Today, I was awoken to a punch in the face. My boyfriend said I was giggling in my sleep and he thought I was possessed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 962

You deserved it 276

Night terrors

By Tanisha Skye Regeling - 11/06/2020 23:02

Today, I woke up with a headache and a bruised forehead after my husband full-force elbowed me in the head last night in his sleep. It wouldn't be so bad, except for the fact he has zero memory of doing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 414

You deserved it 172

By randomguy - 09/07/2012 15:09 - United States - Saylorsburg

Today, I woke up after my pregnant fiancée punched me in the face. Apparently, I rolled over in my sleep and knocked her out of bed. She is still pissed about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 959

You deserved it 12 160

By nosleep - 05/02/2011 00:05 - Australia

Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 231

You deserved it 6 973

Nice Dream

By Better seamstress than mistress - 12/05/2021 19:59

Today, I dreamt that the fabric and pattern I was working on were sliding off the table so I quickly reached to grab it, effectively driving my fingers into my husband's eyes. Fuck his life too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 994

You deserved it 97

By anonymous - 27/02/2010 16:06 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were asleep. Evidently, he was dreaming about being a UFC fighter, because, out of no where, he grabs the back of my head and punches me in the nose. I haven't been able to breathe right out of my nose all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 558

You deserved it 3 103

Real dream

By kaley - 14/12/2019 03:00

Today, I woke up to find that I had given myself a haircut in my sleep. I have a presentation today and a job interview tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 744

You deserved it 355

allmidnighteyes 10

Thursday 6 August 2009 23:21

Prodigy's "Smack My Bitch Up" came on before I logged onto the website and read this. Oh, the irony.

Flip3289 9

Thursday 6 August 2009 23:02

That sucks tape his arms down ;)

Comments

lizardlips 1

Friday 7 August 2009 5:53

when he falls asleep tonight, wrap him up in blankets and then just beat the crap outta him!

Spaz0matic69 0

Friday 7 August 2009 5:56

On the bright side, at least he won lol

davet 0

Friday 7 August 2009 6:36

another fake FML story, just sad.

martymcfly12 0

Friday 7 August 2009 7:30

we need a who cares button now

sirfurbs 1

Friday 7 August 2009 7:43

pretend you had a dream that he was stung by a jellyfish and pee on him!

athos1237 4

Friday 7 August 2009 8:08

You sure he was dreaming? You're not covering up for the abuse the night before? Seems a little far fetched.

haleycstar 0

Friday 7 August 2009 8:13

wow- that had to hurt- but can he really punch that hard in his sleep? I mean, #81 has a point.

Imanasshole420 0

Friday 7 August 2009 9:22

You'll get over it.

the2belo 0

Friday 7 August 2009 9:35

HALF! I'll take half his shit!

Ijacket 0

Friday 7 August 2009 10:34

YDI. For wanting to work outside the kitchen.

Keywords

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 70 429

You deserved it 4 436

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The Top

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You deserved it 3 620

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I agree, your life sucks 1 153

You deserved it 118

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I agree, your life sucks 28 330

You deserved it 10 925

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I agree, your life sucks 32 723

You deserved it 4 510

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I agree, your life sucks 35 259

You deserved it 7 688

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I agree, your life sucks 15 655

You deserved it 1 435