By Anonymous - 11/08/2013 18:11 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I had a dream in which I was being mugged. I started fighting the muggers off, while in reality, my fist smacked my wife in the face. Now she has a black eye, nobody believes my story, and they think I'm a wife beater. FML
I agree, your life sucks 55 320
You deserved it 5 938

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Atleast you didn't stab the muggers in your dream ;]

Why doesn't your wife tell them that your story's true OP. I'm sure they'll believe the story if she says it.

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Atleast you didn't stab the muggers in your dream ;]

imma let you finish but Chris brown was the worst wife beater of all time

I'd be more worried that he's sleeping with a knife by the bed!

It's a good thing that OP doesn't carry a concealed carry weapon in case of muggers

with what? :)

#26 imma let YOU finish in a minute because that was the worst comment of all time. Who am I kidding. No one wants to see that comment finish

damn it bobby brown

Why doesn't your wife tell them that your story's true OP. I'm sure they'll believe the story if she says it.

People probably wouldn't believe the wife's story due to the age old 'fell into the corner of a door' story.

Chances are, people would just assume that the wife is trapped in an abusive relationship and defending her abuser. Such is the society in which we live.

This happened to me with my ex boyfriend except I got a busted lip rather than a black eye. To save him the trouble of explaining when it was just an accident I said my dog jumped on me in the middle of the night. Even though he hit me in his sleep I didn't want people questioning it. It saved a lot of trouble.

My S.O. flails in his sleep, often waking me up with an elbow in my face. Once, he actually punched me in the groin. He's never left a mark, of which I am grateful.

People would probably think she's being forced to lie. Unfortunate, but true. You can never be too careful though

I hate "realistic" dreams.

Even if they are "wet".

Nothing wrong with finding yourself attractive.

you just took all the fun out of it...

Self-love is a forever and ever kind of love

I hear about people who know they're dreaming, but for me every dream is reality until I wake up. It would be cool to know you're dreaming.

Unless you're Narcissus.

Shadow boxing results in injuries OP. Next time get your wife to tie you down in bed with fuzzy handcuffs...

And immobilize OP so he can't fight off the muggers? I've never heard of a worse idea!

Chris Brown, is that you?

I did that to my husband once, but I happened to elbow him in the face while we were sleeping.

I totally get this. My hubby has night terrors as a side effect that never went away from a medication he used to take. I have to wake him up all the time while he's thrashing around.

Did his friends believe you?

Lucid dream = worst dream ever

I wouldn't call this a lucid dream because in lucid dreams you can control whatever happens in the dream.

I realized this after time was up. But thank you.(:

Technically you are a wife beater.

I used to be a wife beater type of guy, but then I realized sleeveless was the way to go. I now only break out my wife beaters on certain occasions.

I was gonna downvote this until I read the whole comment. I see what you did there!

8, how is OP technically a wife beater? It was a dream he had, I forget what the name of it is, but it is some kind of sleeping disorder

I was going to give this comment a thumbs down. But I get it now. I see what y'all did there

At least your wife knows that you will defend attacks on you and yours!

Least you didn't shoot them

That would only work if he went to sleep with a gun in his hand, in which case that would be a completely different problem