By gaggin - 26/12/2012 19:30 - United States - Beverly Hills

Today, I woke up to find pieces of a dead spider stuck in my braces. FML
I agree, your life sucks 56 086
You deserved it 3 974

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I have to stop eating while reading FML's

If you swallow 8 a night, you should do yourself a favor and move out of the amazon river

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Fact: you swallow eight spiders a year in your sleep. But it seems like you chomped yours.

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

No that is not a fact, its a superstition.

7 - Uh, no, it's per year. 8 spiders a night is fucking ridiculous. Also, that's a myth.

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

Myth busters busted that a loooong time ago.

If you swallow 8 a night, you should do yourself a favor and move out of the amazon river

No #7, 8 spiders is fucking disgusting and inhumane.

however, as op has proven, its not impossible

OP hasn't proved your point in any way...

its just what I heard and apparently what I heard was wrong and I am not so proud to not admit it. no need to get in a pissing contest

A pissing contest? ... Well, that escalated quickly.

28 - Apparently you are too proud to admit YOU were wrong, and instead blame it on something someone else told you that was wrong.

proving me wrong, whatever you want to call it.

alright then, when you put it that way, yeah, I was wrong.

If the myth was 8 spiders a night, I would never sleep again. Just sayin'

36 shut up. You are wrong. It's 8 per life time. Not that believe in it....

Actually, since spiders love dark, warm, moist places 8 is far too few an estimate. However, according to the urban legend its 8 per year

You actually swallow more, "alltime10s" on YouTube tackles this very same question.

Sometimes spiders end up in the packed food we buy because there's nothing the factories can do to keep them out

It's actually, you eat 8 spiders in your life time!

Okay we get it. 8 Spiders/lifetime. Let's move on now.

Unless you're a frog I don't think you can swallow 8 spiders in a year.

Right. It was funny though, reading it. But it is 8+ spiders a year, I woke up one morning with the legs in my mouth, they climb in when you sleep with your mouth open at night and before they can leave you close your mouth. It would suck if it was a really poisonous spider or just the thought of if they would lay eggs in you mouth or throat. Maybe smaller spiders go in your ears and nose, laying eggs in your head... That would suck.

thank you 84. I didn't want to sleep ever again anyway

I used to work in a plastic shop. spiders love to make places like that their home. there are thousands. they like to nest in the material bins the presses use that make our products so a lot of times spiders are actually sucked in and made into the plastic thing your buying. though the plastic is seriously hot and the spider is vaporized it really makes you think doesn't it?

Also I once had a friend when she was little that had to have beetle eggs removed from her ear canal. so it does happen. For warning. It's not just spiders.

A spider a day keeps the doctor away, right? I thought the recommended quantity was 2 with every meal. Have I been doing it all wrong? Wait am I not supposed to be living in the rainforest? Hold on, how do I have internet access from here?

Today I had to get my ear syringed due to earwax somehow clogging my ear canal and the doctor said he has gotten 3 live beetles out of people's ears. Glad only compounded wax came out of my ear

103 - I kid you not, bugs in my ear is one of my biggest fears. I totally thought you were about to say "and he ended up pulling a beetle out of my ear."

Fuck all of you, I have enough sleeping problems as it is. D:

one day I woke up to something bothering my ear. It was a spider. fml.

More like a statistical probability. Based on spiders in beds and open mouths per night, or something

How many spiders do you have crawling around your house? 8 per night would be an issue. That's gross.

This whole conversation makes me want to puke, and never sleep again.

That's unfortunate

Why is it unfortunate? Unfortunate would be stepping outside of my house, a tornado touching down 17 inches away from my foot, and in the midst of it all a cat flew into my face and scratched it up. That, is unfortunate. Spider appendages in ones metal armor for teeth is just ghastly.

Really? Because I thought spiders taste good...

37- are you implying that finding a spider in your braces is worse than a tornado/cat attack?

58 - No, when he says unfortunate he means "bad luck", when he says ghastly he means "disgusting".

Poor spider?

Fuck the spider, poor OP. Not that I have anything against spiders, I'm fine with them outside. But once they're in my house or my clothes (or in OP's case, braces) then shit has just gotten personal.

Thread jacking, sorry. But I need to put this to rest. There is absolutely no way people could know if you swallow any bugs in your sleep. The only possible way would be to take a large group of people and put them in identical homes and watch them their ENTIRE LIVES to see how many spiders they swallow before they die. I'm almost 20, I first heard this myth when I was 6, lets drop it already.

I have to stop eating while reading FML's

Yeah, sit on the toilet like every other person on here. Lol

You new? Because if not, I'm surprised you didn't realize it sooner.

24, let us remind the readers of the roaches under the toilet seat... FML should come with a safety warning! lol

Yes! Because you either laugh so hard you choke or you get so grossed out you puke

On average that has happened to you seven times earlier this year.

Can you sling a web?

That's really um.. Disgusting. I'm not going to lie, I pictured a giant spider on you face with its tiny hat stuck in your braces

Good day sir mouth. I'm going to climb into you and trigger your uvula. Tallyho!

18- that's an entirely different picture

18 im crying im laughing so hard xD lmfao

Spiders should take note of you; their webs don't even compare to your braces

well on the bright side you could have gotten sick because of it and never know what happened to you :s well if there is a bright side at all .

*Voice of CL4P-TP* OP! What have you done? that spider had a life and a family! And you killed it! Just kidding! Screw that spider!