By Anonymous - 01/07/2012 04:22

Spicy
Today, I went to the beach with my boyfriend and family. My sister coyly pointed out the scratch marks down his back, hoping to embarrass me in front of my parents. The marks weren't from me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 34 071
You deserved it 2 354
Love
Previous FML Next FML

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

JFurr 9
Send a private message

He's just nervous in his own skin around your parents. So he tried taking it off.

250 11
Reply Report
SovietBarney 8
Send a private message

He must have been attacked by one of those vicious cougars, if you catch my drift.

213 4
Reply Report
Next

Comments

Sandman578737 0
Send a private message

Those are the panic scratch marks of the adolescent raccoon- scrubs

172 11
Reply Report
Oreohugzpenny 4

Does he have a cat? They might be a cats

2 2
Reply Report
Harpy20 24
Send a private message

What a douche. He had some nerve to sport that shit in front of your family too. FYL. I would call him out on the spot in front of everyone and ditch him at the beach.

37 16
Reply Report
adamsimpsona 4
Send a private message

Nice thread jacking fag

0 4
Reply Report
xoconnie 8

or maybe OPs boyfriend is the same guy from the FML with the cat that attacks him if he doesnt let it sleep on his pillow! :O

57 4
Reply Report
zack11742 7
Send a private message

Haha 1 that made my day

3 4
Reply Report
reddawn1985 12
Send a private message

Or the raccoon in family guy that attracted peter when they where in witness protection

4 4
Reply Report
newbiehere99 6
Send a private message

Maybe he didn't let the cat sleep on his pillow too ...

5 5
Reply Report
downtime 12
Send a private message

40, Or you could go the stable route and ask him about them to avoid having yourself dumped and ridiculed if it turns out to be something completely innocent. You know what they say about not burning bridges, right?

9 4
Reply Report
Harpy20 24
Send a private message

Because scratches on the back from sex can be confused with so many other things... /sarcasm

2 12
Reply Report
vuragado 10

Harpy your stupid. God.

0 7
Reply Report
JFurr 9
Send a private message

He's just nervous in his own skin around your parents. So he tried taking it off.

250 11
Reply Report
SofiaFaolan 8
Send a private message

Best comment yet

2 2
Reply Report
Mademoiselle_fml 34

Maybe he has a very rough back scratcher?

93 6
Reply Report
awagh666 14
Send a private message

Yeah, he's 6'3", 250 lbs and is named Jamaal

37 4
Reply Report
TourettesGuyFTW 25
Send a private message

Actually, I heard that Jamaal was the gentle one...

16 3
Reply Report
brendenac 4
Send a private message

I bet she is. Lol

0 3
Reply Report
TG_Wolf 1
Send a private message

Judging by OP's reaction I presume he doesn't own any pets. If he had a cat then he might have an excuse, a dog could mean something kinky >_> In any case, pull him aside and confront him. Since he seems to like it rough maybe you could indulge him, eh? >:}

15 72
Reply Report
whosindahouse 9
Send a private message

He could have gone to someone else's house like a friend or family that has a pet and he got scratched there. Just maybe...

8 7
Reply Report
Shrike 23
Send a private message

Yeah, but what are the chances of him innocently being topless at someone else's house, and having a pet suddenly go feral and attack his back of all places?

12 3
Reply Report
missamazinggg 12

You can have a shirt on and still have horrible scratches from a cat.

7 2
Reply Report
NanillaVipples 2
Send a private message

Or maybe... he cheated on OP!

17 2
Reply Report
SovietBarney 8
Send a private message

He must have been attacked by one of those vicious cougars, if you catch my drift.

213 4
Reply Report
olpally 32

I catch your drift... I love being attacked by cougars ;)

5 23
Reply Report
Macrid 3
Send a private message

So you also know mah man Dunkey?

0 4
Reply Report
awagh666 14
Send a private message

Yeah, he's 6'3", 250 lbs and is named Jamaal

7 48
Reply Report
hockeyoceancity 13

I love your profile picture it fits what you're feeling right now haha.

8 3
Reply Report
Sinsation 7
Send a private message

This FML is phrased so oddly. Sounds like it's trying too hard to be an FML.

37 10
Reply Report
Zomg_Okay 26
Send a private message

It's just because the OP didn't break it up into multiple sentences, choosing instead to write one long one that becomes confusing because of its length.

18 1
Reply Report
VeganVampyre 26
Send a private message

See, I was thinking it was the horrible grammar in the first sentence... But hey, what do I know?

15 2
Reply Report
music_woman1 11
Send a private message

Stop jumping to conclusions, there could easily be an innocent explanation for this

49 13
Reply Report
TarieBoo 2

But it's on FML so we're kinda hoping it's not

28 2
Reply Report
DollyDope 17

Its not too innocent but perhaps he was on opiates, prescribed or not, and scratched himself too hard. It's happened to me.

5 3
Reply Report
DustyStorm 16
Send a private message

Lotsa doubt here

1 2
Reply Report
CharliesCool2084 8
Send a private message

There could be a lot of explanations for that.

37 8
Reply Report
doctorhook86 24
Send a private message

When I was 15 I had "scratch marks" that no one gave me all over my back; I asked a doctor about it, and learned they were actually just stretch marks from an adolescent growth spurt.

15 1
Reply Report
Fmlsea 28
Send a private message

there's a difference between stretch marks and scratch marks .

10 10
Reply Report
doctorhook86 24
Send a private message

35: Swear to God, they looked exactly like scratches from sex.

13 1
Reply Report
dacuar 0

Your a liar

0 1
Reply Report
Next