By Anonymous - 26/10/2012 07:23 - Australia - Queanbeyan

Today, I went out to a restaurant with a girl I have been dating. The only conversation was about how proud she was of her fart during work earlier, and how she managed to clear out a section of the office. FML
I agree, your life sucks 23 900
You deserved it 3 224

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Maybe she wasn't interested so she tried to get you to dislike her?

Mr_Mole 24

I'll have her instead then. There's nothing wrong with a down to earth girl that finds that funny.


That's a little harsh. For all we know OP didn't help the situation by creating conversation off his own. And hey, if she's that open about farting, she must really dig the guy.

asianswag 6

Check please... Before she rips another one.

Stormdriven37 6

Why do all girlfriend-related FMLs always have that one person who comments this, or something to the same effect?

69, it's because they envy the fact that the OP has/had a relationship and they don't

furry_fml 6

All of you are stupid. The way OP made the FML made it look like they did not enjoy the fact that that was the only thing she said. It seems like they did not like her farting and that dating her was awkward, so if you take it the wrong way fine, but don't be a complete moron

LiterOfCola 16

Everyone's so harsh on the "dump her/him" comments. Think about it, though. They aren't in a serious relationship yet; they've simply "been dating" which sounds rather casual. When you're just starting to date someone, something like this could easily make you not want to go out with the person again.

BellaBelle_fml 23

I don't care who you are, how old you are, or where you're from, farts are universally funny! Although, I do agree that there is a time and a place for such behavior and conversation. And on a date in a restaurant isn't exactly it.

DKParth13 5

No actually ... She's a keeper!

for farting? you're gonna be in for one hell of a surprise when you enter a relationship!

no, 2 is actually correct. Girls that act like "one of the dudes" = grossest, most undesirable thing ever. OP is better off finding a woman who actually does woman stuff.

zingline89 18

59 - Speak for youself. Not everyone likes the same thing in a girl and your generalization is very close minded.

What exactly does woman stuff include?

Oh! I have an idea. How about women act however they want and be themselves, and not just do "woman stuff" to please men.

asianperry 8

By "woman stuff" you mean making the guy a sandwhich? You seem like one of "those guys."

"Women stuff"? Sorry to burst your safe little bubble but womens' bodies act the same as mens'. Quit being so immature.

silbot 11

2- You've OBVIOUSLY been in lots of relationships...

59- I can be lady-like as well as 'like one of the guys'. My husband loves it.

Kn0wledge123 21

Alright, I'm gonna play Devil's Advocate. I see what 59 is saying, although he said it in a very stupid sexist way. Lets be frank here folks; yes guys do enjoy a woman who can kick back, have a beer, watch the Heat game (LeBron, Bosh, Wade, whoo!) and kick ass at Call of Duty. But at the end of the day, we still want a woman. Not necessarily "bitch back to the kitchen and make me sammich", but one who's classy and keeps herself up. Lady in the streets, freak in the bed? Y'all know what I mean. I'm sure if none of you are slobs around your boyfriend. Sure, there are times where you fart in front of him, need to burp, don't wear any make up and have your bad hair days, but that's not ALWAYS like you're one of his boys. If that was the case, he would be dickin down his friends, not you. So by "lady stuff" I don't think 59 is talking about "never fart in my presence EVER - I am man hear me roar". But that a conversation on how heinous her fart was is not exactly "lady like". Especially in a public area. Tell me that at home or over the phone. Y'all feel me? I do apologize if I sounded sexist. I really am not. *gets ready for oncoming flames and down votes*

Actually if I were to fart in public and manage to clear a room and was with my husband at a restaurant in public I'd brag about it. Because that'd be most likely when it would come up. If you're uncomfortable about your body around your husband, good luck living together. My husband talks to me while I'm ******** or pissing and vice versa. Plus he also checks if I have problems. He's like my little doctor, only not getting paid for it. If you can have sex with a man, but can't handle your own farts, you've got problems.

Kn0wledge123 21

Ok I probably didn't explain myself well. Not saying you have to be uncomfortable about your own bodily functions. That's nonsense. A conversation like that I'm sure is private. I would say the same for a guy as well. If I were to go to a restaurant, took a dump or huge fart, then came back to the dinner table and bragged about it, I can't complain if the woman I'm with never wants to see me again. Maybe I was raised with a snobby etiquette, but I don think that's proper conversation in a public area. Perhaps the woman is already comfortable with OP and thought it would be fine to talk about, he obviously feels different. I don't think he should dump her, but he should say something.

I don't know about that, 43, is she cleared out a chunk of her office with her gas then she may not be enjoyable to be around.

It always stinks when they're not the one.

I think she was lying! Girls don't fart, burp, or poop. Sorry she wasted your time though.

Maybe she wasn't interested so she tried to get you to dislike her?

This makes the most sense so far. Honestly, even though I have met girls who are to say the least, not very hygienic, all girls I have met do not readily talk about their body's gastrointestinal functions, unless when openly discussing intimacy with a partner. Having said this, OP's "Girl [OP] was dating", just might be very open and want to build bonds. But that will be a story for another comment.

lexxiii 17

I agree. I'm not sure what this girl's personality is like, but I remember a year or so ago, I went on this date with a guy. During the date, I realised how odd he actually was and I wound up talking about gross stuff like OP's date because I didn't have the heart to tell him I didn't like him after he took me out to dinner and paid for my meal. (And I offered to pay but he refused.) I was hoping it would turn him off so much that I would not be receiving any calls from him again.

Agreed. Was totally expecting her to take some tips from White Chicks and start gnawing off her toenails.

catanita 18

Dump her. This is not a thing to brag about. She's a stinky.

Osito2011 9

I think it's cute when a girl you are "Dating" farts or talks about farts. It usually means they are very comfortable enough with you and themselves. She's a keeper

Fun fact: Men and women average the same number of farts per day. Men brag about it all the time. Maybe OP's girlfriend grew up with a lot of brothers and she is more comfortable with talking about bodily functions because of it.

Well... It is a big achievement, isn't it?

Sure is. I have managed to make two people throw up due to my farts over my lifetime. The only way I'm proposing, is if she can out fart me. Shred ass, ladies...

Mr_Mole 24

I'll have her instead then. There's nothing wrong with a down to earth girl that finds that funny.

She is going to Dutch oven the OP when there sleeping together.

Then you're a keeper! You do know that girls fart, burp, and poop. And like you, I do find those topics funny.

Ahhhh! I'm in love! Exactly my kinda girl :)

One thing is having a sense of humor, and one thing is class. This is on the line.

Hey, some people take that as a badge of honor. A smelly badge, but a badge none the less.

YDI. Why didn't you begin with another conversation theme?

Or at least try a different topic/ tangent? Step1: Farting discussion Step 2: Compliment her. Step 2b: ask to see the "weapon" Step3: compliment her cute butt Step4: "if you know what I mean" look Step5: Legen-dairy.

If you're having girl problems I feel bad for you son. I got 99 problems but bitch aint one. Okay that wasnt very clever.

If you knew it wasn't clever why did you even post it in the first place?

ExplodingToaster 6