Today, I was walking through the mall with my husband. We came across a guy who was selling some weight loss pills. He tried to sell me some and I kindly declined. He told me not to deny my weight problems. Thanks. I'm 7 months pregnant. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my husband wants me to apologize for getting angry when his father told me I'm getting so fat that I look like a whale. I'm not fat, I'm just 8 months pregnant. FML
Today, I was grocery shopping. When I turned around I noticed a group of teens passing by laughing. I didn't think anything of it until I got to my cart. The losers had left a pack of Slim Fast in my cart. I'm pregnant. FML
Today, I ran into an old friend at the store with my infant daughter. As we caught up, she assured me that I could get rid of all my baby weight from the pregnancy. If only I had actually been pregnant. My wife carried her and looks fantastic. FML
Today, a customer greeted me with, "So! When's the baby coming!?" I'm NOT pregnant. I just gain weight in my guts. FML
Today, the creepy skin care guy at the mall with the heavy accent asked me if I was pregnant. When I said no he replied "Oh, too many donuts then?" FML
Today, I was taking my 3 month-old nephew for a walk in his stroller, when a lady stopped me to coo over him. Then she patted my stomach and said, "Don't worry, you'll lose the baby weight soon." I've never had a baby. FML
Today, while at a family baby shower, my grandfather thought it would be funny to inform me, in front of everyone, that I had gotten fat. I'm 7 months pregnant and the baby shower was for me. FML
Today, I was carrying some bags out of a store, and my shirt had scooted up a little. I had no free hands, so I ignored it. A woman stopped me to tell me that bare midriffs are only attractive on skinny girls, "not fat ones." I'm 6 months pregnant. FML
Today, while shopping for clothes, I asked the assistant to recommend something for me. She took me to the maternity section. Thanks, but I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, in the middle of the store, my daughter pointed at my belly and loudly announced that she was going to have a brother. I'm a man, and apparently I need to lose weight. FML
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Top comments
MrsUchiha 0
The best thing you can do is move on.. I mean there's no way this ****** up your life. You and your hubby know you're not fat so that's all that matters. Congrats on the baby. :)
astro_plastic 0
Train your baby to be a ninja assassin and come see that guy again in a few more months.
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Comments (147)
josh78 0
My sister is pregnant right now and due in may she constantly gets "really your due in may that looks more like march" "wow your chubby for may" and other crap and it pisses me off along with her and he husband who is about to kick some serious butt because of these comments
babykitsune102 0
no shit your ganna be fat ur knocked up
gman79 0
preggo chicks always think they're allowed to get fat, news flash you only should gain 10% more weight MAX (not in the first month) btw, I'm not a hater, I'm a fat girl fetishist
flufffypants 0
I wonder what a condomn could have done to this FML hmmm?
LadyDraigen 3
Well, fat girls are recommended to gain about 10%. The basic rule is at least 20 lbs, more if you are underweight to start with. Twins? At least 8-10 more pounds.
letmeinplease 0
My friend teaches salespeople like that. They're told to push it as far as possible. I wouldn't worry and get het up by a dumb advertising strategy OP.
blueflame 2
this would only be an FML if you weren't pregnant.
blastvortex 4
I'd say that you should tell him you're pregnant, but personally, I'd likely yell it at him instead.
Bagel09 11
wow what a ******* moron
TheWaaaaambulanc 0
Baaaaaaaaaaaw. That's my best response.
screwedupclick 0
stay away from then pastries then u fat wench
Tarak_fml 7
better than just being fat