By cay - 30/01/2013 19:59 - United States - Holley

Today, I was trying to sleep away a fever, when my grandma woke me up. She was sitting next to me, shoving gummy bears into my mouth until I started choking. She laughed, ran away, and denied everything. FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 309
You deserved it 3 239

Same thing different taste

Top comments

perdix 29

Grandma running away and laughing? Are you sure you're not delirious from the fever? Go easy on the gummy bears and don't blame your dead relatives for your overindulgence.

Fair warning, you grandmother might be a sociopath. Don't go to sleep.


Are you sure you weren't hallucinating? If not, your grandma rocks!

Ok, why don't you have your grandmother try to choke you in your sleep. Tell me how that goes for you, if you survive.

All it would take to make sure they weren't just hallucinating or dreaming is to pull the gummi bears out of their mouth. Ta-da.

Elderly people tend to have an old-fashion sense of humor (: As I see it, this is refreshing - A bit odd perhaps... Had it been my grandmother, it would probably have been oatmeal?! Another reason for my new found respect for that generation!

17- my father also thinks its hilarious to shove food in my mouth. Usually fruit, though, like pears and strawberries. Perhaps it's some sort of generational thing.

When I was 10 I had a sleepover birthday party. We thought it would be funny to shove cheezies down the first person who fell asleep's throat. We got in a LOT of trouble. He didn't choke thank god. But 1, this isn't really a sense of humour thing. It's extremely dangerous. I didn't understand that when I was 10 but obviously OP's grandma is an adult. Not awesome.

perdix 29

Grandma running away and laughing? Are you sure you're not delirious from the fever? Go easy on the gummy bears and don't blame your dead relatives for your overindulgence.

Who said she wasn't? Who says we even exist? .. Philosophy!

perdix 29

#28, no one, really. Since both of my grandmas have passed away, I just decided to ASS-U-ME that the OP's are, too. Once you hang around here awhile, you'll realize that I like to make shit up. ;)

perdix 29

#30, according to Descartes, "Commento, ergo sum" (I comment, therefore, I am). So, I'm good ;)

I Kant believe we're going into philsophy here.

ThePsyche 9

The real question is, if I don't choose to "show comment anyway," does #1's comment still stink? Schoenberg ftw!

ThePsyche 9

#48 Schrödinger's cat * sorry -_- auto correct is such a sour gummy bear.

perdix 29

#53, perhaps you mean Heisenberg, but I can't be certain?

ThePsyche 9

#55 Well, Schrödinger was the first to prove, experimentally, the problems with the Copenhagen interpretation of quantum mechanics. It's quite interesting stuff. Like, blow-your-mind-scientifically-induced-coma type stuff. :)

Snicker snack. I am using Ocams razor to skin Schroedingers cat.

bfsd42 20

I am such a damn nerd. I found 55's comment to be hilarious.

It may have been L'Hopital, but I wouldn't rule out that it's Simpson.

What a Nietzsche little discussion we're getting into here.

Fair warning, you grandmother might be a sociopath. Don't go to sleep.

Damian95 16

Grandma FML's are on the rise. Not sure if I should be amused, or keep a close eye on my own grandma! Maybe both...

So, she sounds a bit homicidal, and that probably isn't the most efficient way to kill someone without being noticed. Plus she denies everything while laughing. I'd say this needs to be looked into. Quick. And dealt with. Seriously.

Technically he never said she was laughing while denying really could be some fever hallucination stuff going on here

I ruled out hallucination, because to write this FML it would be some time later and they would have had time to determine whether the incident really happened or not, and since it is on FML I assumed that they had concluded that Grandma was stuffing gummy bears down her throat for real.

Meh maybe grandma has dementia but I was thinking it was on FML because nobody believed her and she was unable to prove it... That's why I was leaning towards hallucination lol.

spliit_fml 8

6- Why do people on here always think that when a crazy, demented grandma/pa does something insane like this that they're awesome?

Well, tell your parents and start locking your door. If it doesn't have a lock, put one on.

beachchick9498 5

I've always wondered, can you call a woman a douchebag?

Yes. It actually works better that way.

KiddNYC1O 20

#9- You seem like a douche too. =P

Feed a cold, starve a fever. It doesn't say anything about sleeping away a fever! Unless I missed that day of medical school...

TheDrifter 23

These daggummed lazy whippersnappers, always looking for a reason to hide from work. "Sleep away a fever" Humbug. /rant

It doesn't hurt to sleep when you're sick. It rests your body to help you get better! Just kidding, I'm a young whippersnapper trying to get out of work.

Ive never recomended this to a patient, but I always go for a run with fever. I either sweat out all the bad shit or ended up sick as shit. Usually the run works, but boy it sucks running 5 miles feeling like ass.

My head usually pounds when I have a fever. Running with a pounding head is like running with scissors. All fun and games until you slip into a coma...

Lock your door and hide your gummy bears!