By Anonymous - 13/06/2013 16:01 - United States - Walker
benhd1
mr
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Hi!
My name's Ben Howard, I like knitting, unicorns and long walks along moonlit beaches. In fact, I once saw a unicorn while walking along the beach at midnight, which I then stabbed with my knitting needle.
My sense of humour often offends people. I'm sorry I didn't know your seventh cousin twice removed has Tourette's syndrome, and frankly I'll work right on learning every little detail about you, stranger, so as not to offend little old you. And thank you for taking the time out of your busy day to come up to me on the street and interrupt my private conversation.
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Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start. -
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile. -
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern. -
Socialite
You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see… -
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done! -
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature. -
I agree, my mouse works.
200 "I agree" votes is a good start. -
Judgmental
You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times. -
100 kick-ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name! -
50 quality comments
Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier. -
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated. -
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit. -
50 favorites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list! -
It's in the can!
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten! -
The thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments. -
I’m your new creative director
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about. -
The return of the thumb
You have thumbed 5000 comments. -
Happy ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.” -
Tweet, tweet
You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we understand why. -
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date. -
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date. -
Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja
You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date. -
42
See, son, moderating FMLs is like a marathon. -
Picture this FML
You left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article. -
I liked to the power of 20
You've liked 20 FMLs, and your Facebook friends are going to like the FMLs you liked. -
YDI Master
You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote. -
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic. -
Perfectionist
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter. -
A new thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments. -
The rules are the rules
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator. -
Work is a 4-letter word
Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic. -
Tell us what happened next
You've commented on an FML that you sent in -
My diary is a collector's item
There were only 100 numbered VDM diaries for 2011/2012. I've got one. -
One more and it's business time
You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
I agree, your life sucks
53 126
You deserved it
3 565
By sugarysofalof - 13/06/2013 04:22 - United States - Denver
I agree, your life sucks
41 120
You deserved it
29 308
sugarysofalof tells us more.
By rexob - 04/02/2009 15:51 - United States

I agree, your life sucks
245 241
You deserved it
13 904
rexob tells us more.
thanks for all those who are genuinely concerned...i really appreciate it. i'm hanging in there, and hopefully my sister will be alright. we've been to therapy and i think it's helped her, but i don't know how this will come up later in life for us. again, i really appreciate those of you who took this seriously.
By instinct - 12/06/2013 03:06 - Australia - Doncaster East

I agree, your life sucks
38 807
You deserved it
78 163
By thanksdoc - 24/06/2013 22:12 - United States - San Antonio
I agree, your life sucks
34 933
You deserved it
6 389
thanksdoc tells us more.
Yes, my psychiatrist is a boss. She did the impression spot on without looking up from her notes, which was hilarious. Woopwoopwoopwooooop
Hahahaha I was wondering why my bottom lip looked slightly fuller today...now I am reminded. This happened late last night. Somehow that response was involuntary. If that labels me with stereotypical American idiocy, so be it. I wouldn't have posted this on FML if I was looking for sympathy :)