Today, I was sparring with a guy in my Tae Kwon Do class. He had a hard-on the entire time we were sparring. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was helping a 7 year-old student in my martial arts class with his kicks. My reward? A surprisingly powerful kick to the testicles. FML
Today, at karate, my sparring partner thought it was completely okay to surprise kick me in the vagina. When he saw me doubled over in pain, he was completely surprised. Apparently, he thought that it wouldn't hurt, because I have no penis. FML
Today, at martial arts practice, a guest sensei wanted to teach me some "manners". He pinned me down and proceded to choke me while crushing my nuts with his hands and yelling at me in front of the whole class, "DOES THAT HURT?!!?" FML
Today, we sparred for Tae Kwon Do. I forgot my cup, but I didn't think anyone sucked enough to hit me below the belt. Five seconds into a match, some girl knees me in the Hacky Sacks. After writhing in pain for 30 seconds, I got back up to spar. I didn't think she sucked enough to do it again. She did. FML
Today, I was at my Muay Thai class. We were doing a combination which consisted of a low kick, body kick and head kick. My partner had already done the low kick so I held the pads for the body kick. He kicked me straight in the jaw. I'm a teenage girl and he's a fully grown man. FML
Today, I decided to challenge the jerk jock at work to a fight, since he kept poking fun at me for being a weakling. Having started taking MMA classes, I was confident I'd make him eat his words. Just my luck, he's an MMA instructor and kicked my ass effortlessly. Not what I had planned. FML
Today, I was in gym class talking to a guy I like. My friend then decided to come up behind me and pants me, pulling down my underwear along with them. His only comment? "Someone needs to shave." FML
Today, my period started. It wouldn't be a big deal if it hadn't happened while I was in my karate class practicing kicks, and if the guy I have a crush on hadn't informed me of it after chuckling. FML
Today, while arm wrestling with my boyfriend, I had to pretend he beat me. FML
Today, I witnessed my karate instructor whimper and practically piss himself as a guy walked up to him in the street and demanded his wallet. What a total waste of hundreds of dollars' worth of lessons. FML
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Top comments
Maxine17 8
Should have sparred him in the dick!
flyinmysoup 0
might have been more of an fml for him. i bet he was embarrassed
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Comments (228)
ERAUPike 1
That's probably because Tae Kwon Do is gay
pet_virus 0
This^
Tigg3r 3
Do you even know anything about Tae Kwon Do? Have you ever even tried it? Or have you been doing some martial art like Karate? Maybe Ju-Jitsu? No, no. If you were doing a martial art you would have some respect for other martial arts and styles. So #22 learn some facts and use an actual word like sucks to be an insult. Gay is just a no.
ERAUPike 1
Tae Kwon Do is gayer then five guys getting ****** by ten.
Spaceghost77 0
Buwhahahahaha! I just shot coffee out my nose you bastard!
ERAUPike 1
Tae Kwon Do is gayer than the volleyball scene in Top Gun.
ERAUPike 1
That because Tae Kwon Do doesn't teach you anything useful. You have to learn how to not piss anyone off. I wouldn't call buying belts and 12 year old black belts a discipline, it is more like after school care.
ERAUPike 1
I could also point out I never called TKD stupid, you did.
ohdammit101 0
^ This.
Waughmonger 0
Who else is waiting for "Today, I was sparring with a guy in my Tae Kwon Do class. He kept staring at my crotch. FML."
jts2 3
I am.
Waughmonger 0
In which case, my apologies. "Today, I was sparring with a girl in my Tae Kwon Do class. She kept staring at my crotch. FML."* Way to make the poor guy feel uncomfortable.
perdix 31
Everybody was *** You fighting! Those dudes were fast as lightning.
Tigg3r 3
It's cats. Those cats were fast as lightning.
perdix 31
Oh, yeah, but thanks for not calling me out for the mistake in the first line. That was intentional.
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
I called you out on it, but it was dictated. Expect a tape recording of it in 6-8 weeks.
myotherlips 0
Why does your life suck? You turn him on!
daydreamstar 7
so uh, i assume you moved on to sword fighting then...
dwbb96 0
it stupid u wear a cup in tae Kwon
CYNNER 0
You deserve it. when you decided to be in that class, you knew you would be in close contact with strong sweaty men. not a fml. i hope he sneaks up behind you after class sometime
adrianlives702 0
first!
plo_koon 0
fail
julieb123 0
It was probably his cup. This is not an FML.
yep_me_again 0
as the only girl in my wrestling club, I can totally relate to this FML. And you can always tell the difference between a cup and a hard on -_-