Today, I was making love to my girlfriend and was pretty impressed with myself for lasting through multiple songs. Then I realized her ipod was playing a medley. I only lasted 3 1/2 minutes. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other. Before, I reached over to her computer and put on "Your Body is a Wonderland". Surprisingly, I lasted through the song and didn't realize her iTunes was on random. "Rape Me" by Nirvana came on. I still finished. FML
Today, I made love to my girlfriend. I penetrated her for a while, then stopped to get my breath back... She carried on moaning even though I'd stopped moving. FML
Today, my girlfriend were having sex. When I finished, she whispered in my ear, "30 seconds." FML
Today, I had a one night stand. After her laying there without moving for ages, she impatiently asked if I'd finished. Once she got bored and told me to just finish myself off, her song playlist began playing "Never Gonna Dance Again". Very romantic. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex to music, which we hadn't done before. I was getting close when it cut to commercial. I was so turned off by the idea of coming during an ad break that I didn't come at all. Thanks Spotify. FML
Today, after spending months learning how to play the guitar and memorizing the music to my girlfriend's all-time favorite song, I performed it for her. Her response? "Well, you kind of ruined that song for me now." FML
Today, I was trying to impress a girl I like by showing off my guitar skills at a party. I'd hyped it up all night. When I finally started playing, I’d forgotten most of the chords and lyrics to the song, and ended up just strumming "Wonderwall" while humming off-key. She left halfway through the "performance." FML
Today, I took pills to make sure I lasted longer with my girlfriend. Good news? It worked fine and is still working now. Bad news? We've been done for a good two hours. FML
Today, my girlfriend was going down on me. She only did it for 30 seconds, stopped, then said, "I'm not in the mood anymore." FML
Today, after practicing a song for my girlfriend on guitar all day, I called her over to my house to show it to her. After a long speech about how "this is for you," I played for about 3 seconds before I broke a string, which slapped her in her face. FML
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Top comments
vooper 0
minute man, I CHOOSE YOU!
idratherbewrestl 0
relax dont do it! when you want to come!
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Comments (102)
thatonekid2010 0
first
ChickenNuggets22 0
Fail
mathsponge 0
1 hahahhahahahaha tough love
iilovehaters 0
ydi for having a small dick
Wankster 0
Wow... You need to work on that lol
longday13 0
FYL but bring ur own iPod next time!!!
caancoha 0
I don't understand why girls are straight sometimes.
teasecake 0
hahah why?!
slimy2 0
woooot number eighteen suck it bee-yatch
The_9th_Doctor 18
you're 19. so much fail
Glam_fml 0
I hope you took the time to actually pleasure her after you were finished, One Minute Wonder.
frankenberrie 0
of you lasted 1 minute your good to go
vrodnumb44 0
tell your girlfriend if she wants some actually good sex and multiple orgasms to see me. I'll do what you failed at probably everytime. I'd be the only nigguh that could make her left thigh shake. ;)