Intimacy: Today, I was making love to my girlfriend and was pretty impressed...

By sadinthesack - 31/08/2009 18:56 - United States

Today, I was making love to my girlfriend and was pretty impressed with myself for lasting through multiple songs. Then I realized her ipod was playing a medley. I only lasted 3 1/2 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 907

You deserved it 10 952

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Same thing different taste

By RollieCollieUSA - 30/01/2009 17:27 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other. Before, I reached over to her computer and put on "Your Body is a Wonderland". Surprisingly, I lasted through the song and didn't realize her iTunes was on random. "Rape Me" by Nirvana came on. I still finished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 739

You deserved it 6 672

By sixsix - 24/12/2008 11:19 - France

Today, I made love to my girlfriend. I penetrated her for a while, then stopped to get my breath back... She carried on moaning even though I'd stopped moving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 194

You deserved it 8 671

Fast and Furious

By Anonymous - 02/03/2020 01:00

Today, my girlfriend were having sex. When I finished, she whispered in my ear, "30 seconds." FML

I agree, your life sucks 887

You deserved it 1 805

Careless Whisper?

By InsultToInjury - 28/12/2018 04:00

Today, I had a one night stand. After her laying there without moving for ages, she impatiently asked if I'd finished. Once she got bored and told me to just finish myself off, her song playlist began playing "Never Gonna Dance Again". Very romantic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 122

You deserved it 1 258

By fuckingads - 13/02/2017 19:00 - United States - Brookfield

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex to music, which we hadn't done before. I was getting close when it cut to commercial. I was so turned off by the idea of coming during an ad break that I didn't come at all. Thanks Spotify. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 706

You deserved it 2 163

Ed Shitren

By tommy - 20/12/2011 22:41 - United States

Today, after spending months learning how to play the guitar and memorizing the music to my girlfriend's all-time favorite song, I performed it for her. Her response? "Well, you kind of ruined that song for me now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 035

You deserved it 5 608

Guitar hero

By Jammy Handtricks - 18/08/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I was trying to impress a girl I like by showing off my guitar skills at a party. I'd hyped it up all night. When I finally started playing, I’d forgotten most of the chords and lyrics to the song, and ended up just strumming "Wonderwall" while humming off-key. She left halfway through the "performance." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56

You deserved it 821

By imsorrylove - 31/03/2010 04:44 - United States

Today, I took pills to make sure I lasted longer with my girlfriend. Good news? It worked fine and is still working now. Bad news? We've been done for a good two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 218

You deserved it 33 141

Bored

By Taylor parsons - 29/10/2010 04:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was going down on me. She only did it for 30 seconds, stopped, then said, "I'm not in the mood anymore." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 456

You deserved it 7 543

By Anonymous - 06/05/2009 20:12 - Canada

Today, after practicing a song for my girlfriend on guitar all day, I called her over to my house to show it to her. After a long speech about how "this is for you," I played for about 3 seconds before I broke a string, which slapped her in her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 288

You deserved it 6 379

vooper 0

Monday 31 August 2009 23:13

minute man, I CHOOSE YOU!

idratherbewrestl 0

Monday 31 August 2009 23:05

relax dont do it! when you want to come!

Comments

idratherbewrestl 0

Monday 31 August 2009 23:05

relax dont do it! when you want to come!

Scorpitarrius 0

Wednesday 2 September 2009 4:09

ahahahahahaa. classic-nothin like a Frankie Goes To Hollywood joke. As the nerds say, win.

danielleeycakes 3

Tuesday 25 May 2010 1:58

he lasted longer than my boyfriend ever has. coughcoughheonlynlastes57secondslasttime.

SoundnVasion 0

Monday 26 July 2010 0:50

2 pump chump!

elite_stoner 0

Thursday 22 December 2011 0:51

nice name op... think about dead puppies but not to much or you will go limp

Suptnik 9

Monday 16 July 2012 19:53

72 - Hell, I would go for 57 seconds. It's better than lasting almost an hour every damn time

movies12 0

Monday 31 August 2009 23:07

FYL.

adriandenee 0

Tuesday 24 August 2010 5:26

hmmm

teqifsha 0

Monday 31 August 2009 23:07

this happened to me before

EmreArslan 11

Thursday 3 November 2011 23:49

Dont worry at all foreplay is recommended ;) and besides after ur done u still can use ur mouth or fingers for her pleasure just enjoy the sex and dont worry about how long u last

tyson346 0

Monday 31 August 2009 23:12

Wtf?

hurtandabused 7

Monday 23 April 2012 5:27

When people say it's normal I don't understand it. (not bragging or being a bitchy sue) but my fiancé(whom I lost my virginity to n is the only guy I've been with) lasted over an hour our first time n he was a virgin as well, n now he lasts longer now. How come it's normal for a guy to last. So short? Why is that?

Kkkdawg 27

Saturday 18 October 2014 15:29

My boyfriend lasts a really long time too..Sometimes I wish he wouldn't :/ But I also don't understand why everyone thinks it's normal to last 30 seconds.

zykrithium 22

Monday 23 February 2015 21:56

How is it normal to not climax for an hour?

withered 30

Tuesday 5 July 2016 12:31

How? By not being selfish, caring about your partner's pleasure too and by having stamina. You know you can pause if your stamina is nonexsistant and use other techniques until you can continue?