By Anonymous - 19/06/2012 03:33 - United States

Spicy
Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML
I agree, your life sucks 49 269
You deserved it 4 597

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Better make sure he washes his hands first from now on, especially if they're up his ass.

If you guys go as far as having sex, when he enters, you should say, "Huh, feels like my pinky finger."

Comments

Those two feel nothing alike.

Have you fingered his asshole?

Maybe they do. And now he can hold the threat of switching to the other team over her head. ;-)

A vj all silky smooth an ass tighter and rougher. How do I know? Ridden em both.

How do you know? Have you felt the inside of his ass?

Unless she is ridiculously tight... And dry.

Better question: did he finger the girlfriend, too?

Better make sure he washes his hands first from now on, especially if they're up his ass.

This is even worse than the guy who said it felt like the scroll ball on his blackberry! If you remember this FML, you've been here too long, along with me

I wouldn't want his fingers near me if he told me that...

Hmm. That's a shitty finger

If you guys go as far as having sex, when he enters, you should say, "Huh, feels like my pinky finger."

So his asshole feels moist and slippery?

Something about this stinks, I can't put my finger on it, though...

45 maybe he uses a lot of lube.

No offense but I think he is gay. Well, does it sound like it? Nvm. How can he not enjoy playing with a pussycat minus the cat?

45 Or maybe she wasn't wet at all

What what in the butt

Am I the only one who realized op was wrong? She WASN'T the first one he fingered! (he was)

I think he's hiding something

Well, not anymore.

I was about to say that, 12. Lol, yeah, it's not hidden anymore!

I think he was hiding something.....up his butt.

Pfft. Doing buttstuff doesn't make you gay.

True True - I love anal play but am not, nor have I ever been, gay!

Hey, if it feels good sticking your fingers in your butt, who are we to judge? It wasn't so long ago that masturbating was considered sinful and absolutely disgusting, but look at us now! Rubbing one out has many health benefits. I, for one, know that I'm at a lower risk for cervical cancer because I'm fap-happy. Hurry for enjoying our bodies!

I meant 'hurray' but I guess my phone isn't as excited about self-love as I am. Shucks.

Yeah, like the fact he lied about it being a first time. Pretty sure yourself counts somehow.

but can you deny it?

A vagina should not feel like the inside of someone asshole, if it does they have problems; or they aren't wet enough. Either way it shouldn't happen. I'm curious as to how he would know that, it's not everyday a straight guy sticks his finger up is ass.

1) Yes, we can deny it. If your ass feels the same way as a vagina, there's something very wrong with it. 2) I think you underestimate the amount of guys that stick things in their arse. It feels good for them, you know, having a prostate. So yeah, it's pretty everyday that a straight guy sticks his finger up his ass.

they are, relatively speaking, fairly similar in texture and feel being they are both mucus membranes. I find that usually the ol' brown eye is much uhh tighter than the fish taco but (again mucous membrane speaking) similar

When being fingered, a vagina is (hopefully) wet and soaky, while a butthole tends to stay dry. Not that similar.

67- I'm so confused as to why you wrote ass twice and arse once. Please explain?

Yes, well, there's a lot we don't know here. A lot of men use lubrication in their personal sexual endeavors. Or, as you've mentioned, she might not be wet yet, in which case, they're doing it wrong.

You can cut the awkward with a knife. That's how dense that shituation got.

Your comment was pretty pointless, but I do like the term "shituation" for when things go wrong. I might borrow it.

Was it in tents, or out?

The comment was obvious. I'm pointing out just how awkward the situation was.... Come on FML commenters that was easy to thumb up.

It's just as easy to thumb down.

Well OP....If he likes it up the ass, then it's up to you to penetrate this problem.

I know some guys like small things up their ass. Because of the prostate it's like the male g-spot if you hit it. My ex girlfriend slipped a finger in once and it actually felt not to bad. This doesn't mean I'm going to go bending over for guys though.

Nothing suspicious here, I'm sure he was just checking his prostate.

That's exactly what he's doing because its the male g spot

He's obviously been practicing

I don't know what should worry you...that he had fingers up his ass or that he compares your vagooo with his butthole. :D

Vagooo made me laugh.

if OP really wanted to see some good in his comment she could think that since assholes are usually tight he was saying she was tight down there which means shes not a slut.....always look for the good in things

Lmao vagooo hahahah

Seems like to me she wasn't even wet.

The only way you'll encounter a loose kitty is if you prefer boning women with children. Giving birth stretches out the vagina permanently, but even then doctors will either sew you back up or it will return to near its original circumference. So, in short, having sex with plenty of different men does not make a female's love cave 'loose'. If that held any truth whatsoever, every sexually active woman would have a wind sock for genitals, depending on how frequent she has her mound pounded by her husband, boyfriend, or girlfriend.

Well, if his fingers have been up his ass, there's no telling where else they've been. I'd have to agree with the first comment and suggest a hand-washing policy.

let's hope he wipes.

Yeah, they could have been his nose up as well!