Today, I was at the pool, casually flirting with one of the lifeguards. He said that he would gladly give me CPR, in the event that I needed it. I laughed and thanked him, stating that it was a sweet idea, even though I wouldn't be needing assistance. I then choked on my bottled water. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I went to the university pool. There was this cute lifeguard there, and every time I got out of the water I saw her looking at me, so I walked up to her and asked if everything was OK. She told me she thought I was going to drown. FML
Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML
Today, on my first day as a lifeguard, a man had a heart attack in the pool. I jumped in, pulled him out, and even went to the hospital with him. He seemed genuinely offended, saying "You should've let me die." FML
Today, I was drinking a bottle of water. My friend came up from behind and scared me, causing me to inhale and choke on the water. Lacking air, I passed out. I awoke to him on the ground laughing his ass off. I almost drowned drinking a bottle of water. FML
Today, I was in swimming practice at the pool. I suddenly got breathless, dizzy, and felt like I was drowning. I cried out to the instructor, telling him I had a weak heart. He shouted back, "I don't care about your love life! Swim, bitch!" FML
Today, we were hanging around the pool with a couple of friends and a crush of mine. Thinking I would be able to impress her with a well-performed dive off the diving board, I went up and attempted my best dive. I slipped as I jumped, hitting my head on the board. I had to be saved by the lifeguard. FML
Today, it's April Fool's day. I had to take a CPR class, and everything was going well. We took a break and I went to get a drink of water and started choking. They thought I was making fun of the class, and made me leave. FML
Today, I decided to go swimming. I knew my technique would be off because I haven't swam since high school. It was when I made it only halfway across the pool that the lifeguard decided to jump in and save me. I wasn't drowning or struggling. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, I got a really bad cramp while I was swimming in my neighborhood pool. I started to go under until the lifeguard jumped in and saved me. I guess it would have been great, if I wasn't a fellow lifeguard. FML
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Top comments
Heartless234 0
Aw that's embarrassing. Hey sometimes I choke on my saliva :D.
mannix_fml 0
It was mean't to be, dum dum!
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Comments (114)
123g33yan123 0
actually..................... when u say your choking on a liquid your not actually choking on a liquid. U have two tubes in u wer everything that goes in your mouth goes through. One is for all the food & liquids that u eat and drink.(the tube that the bottled water was suppose to go through).The other is for all the air that u inhale and exhale.The tube that leads to your lungs. She drank the water and it unfortunatly ended up in her lungs.So when your coughing alot on liquids it's your body's way of getting the liquid out of your lungs.
pleasedonttellme 0
YDI for drinking bottled water you know tap water is the same but cheaper!!
amstillives 0
Don't ever drink water from water bottles. Think green BITCH! YDI DUMBASS
Shyman4ever 0
Fail
SirAwesome 0
Honestly, the world would be a better place if you choked to death. Weed out the morons form the gene pool.
BreezyPear 0
I don't think this is an FML. If anything it's just ironic, in fact it sounds like something from a movie.
Swimmergrl 0
well did he hive you CPR?
ak7987 0
u can't choke on water
winemysavior 4
holy **** how did this make it through? Not an FML 1) you flirted with the lifeguards 2) he flirted back and said he'd give you cpr 3) you choke. even if you said you wouldn't need it, it doesn't make you look stupid, it only pleases him that he may get to do cpr on you. this 'fml' is the worst
Funky_T 0
Are u shore u choked on the water or was it his ****...?....****
winemysavior 4
#90...i found that funny! so STFU #92