Today, I was arrested for carrying a dangerous weapon. I was on my way home from the shop where I'd bought a new kitchen knife. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went to school wearing the same jacket I had gone hiking in the previous day. When I found out that I had left my 2" pocket knife in the pocket I immediately turned it in to the front office. They promptly had me arrested for bringing a weapon on campus. FML
Today, I was arrested for breaking into a house. This is what happens when I lose my key. FML
Today, I stopped by the gun store to pick up a new concealed weapon for protection. As I was leaving the store, a man came up behind me, hit me with a crowbar, and stole my gun. FML
Today, I realized I've been acting very paranoid lately. I was mugged a few weeks ago, so I've been nervous. I've been holding my hands in my pockets and looking around on my way outside from work. Apparently, that's grounds to arrest someone under suspicion of carrying a concealed weapon. FML
Today, I went to court expecting to walk out a free man. Turns out my misdemeanor offense couldn't compare to the crime I committed when I walked into the court house with a switchblade tucked into my shoe. FML
Today, someone had put a lock on my bike. While I was trying to saw it off, the police drove by. I was arrested for trying to steal a bike and released four hours later when they figured out that it was actually my bike. FML
Today, I realized my paranoia is really bad when I saw my coworker holding a knife and immediately began thinking of ways to keep him from stabbing me. I work in a restaurant kitchen. FML
Today, my boyfriend got arrested. For robbing my house. FML
Today, while going to work, I was mugged. On the way back, I was mugged. FML
Today, someone tried to mug me. I panicked and ran. As they chased me with their knife out, I heard a slip and a shout behind me but kept running. Six blocks later I was spotted, arrested, and held for questioning by the police. The mugger fell, stabbed themselves, and told a cop that I did it. FML
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Top comments
Gucci_Girl 2
who'd you stab?
perdix 31
You shouldn't have been wearing your new hockey mask at the same time.
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Comments (241)
meganbrooke69 0
oh wow I'm sorry.
kaprookie 3
Kitchen knives are weapons OP
brittaussi 0
Well u know how dangerous those kitchen knives can be
BitchPlease18 6
Wow... This is what society has turned into.
lululatenight 28
The system works
10th_Man 16
That's what your great gun control ban has gotten you. Now they're trying to take your knives away too and you're supposed to be the model for civilization to the US. If people can't see how ****** up this is they're blind. Sorry you have to live like that OP.
willliamfriend 18
Police are ****** up sometimes. Was it still in the "wrapper"?
EpicAsh007 15
Not in the states #murica