Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML
Today, I sneaked into my girlfriend's house for some romantic time. Before going into her room, I took a dump in the bathroom. Once I was done, I not only noticed that there was no toilet paper left, but I heard her and her 6'5, heavyweight boxer, ex-marine father, talking outside the bathroom door. FML
Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by quietly undressing and sneaking into the bathroom to join him in the shower. He was bent over taking a dump, pushing his turd down the plughole. FML
Today, I wanted to take a romantic bath with my boyfriend. I set up the candles and hot water, but I had to take a dump. After my business was done, I called him into the bath. He walks in, sniffs, glances at the toilet and leaves. Guess what I forgot to flush. FML
Today, I was peeing in the shower when my girlfriend suddenly pulled open the shower curtain in an attempt to scare me. Startled, I quickly spun around and peed all over her dress. FML
Today, I took a shower at my girlfriend's apartment. I was wandering around, gathering my clothes when I noticed my girl doing her hair in the other room. She looked sort of peculiar, so I stood there, studying her. Half naked. I then realized it wasn't my girlfriend, but her roommate. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided we are ready for the next step in our relationship. Apparently that next step is her taking a dump with the door open. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, my wife dragged me to the bathroom, promising to "show something hot." Not that I was in the mood, but okay. She took off her pants, sat on a toilet, and demanded that I tell her about my day. She wanted me to entertain her while she was taking a dump. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. My mom thinks it's ok to just walk in on someone when they are in there so she decides to take a crap. The worst part is she thought it would be less awkward to talk to me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
iljajlm 4
It's this wonderful invention God himself bleesed us with and it's a really complictaed process. The angels named it knocking on the door. You should try it.
KINGMARIO_fml 0
she took a dump in the shower?!?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (255)
jc21_fml 1
maybe she was just sitting there chillin and when you came in you scared the SHIT out of her. hahaha SICK!
MyCubicleRomance 0
SEVENTY NINTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
22jrdn55 15
lmao... i literally rofl jc21 u just made my day
MollyisCuute 0
How am I being a pussy? I said she should act like a lady. puss·y 1 (pŏŏs'ē) n. pl. puss·ies Informal A cat. Botany A fuzzy catkin, especially of the pussy willow. Vulgar Slang The vulva. Sexual intercourse with a woman.
beaman123 0
Submit your mlis or mlif and you will get entered in the biweekly giveaway! www.mylifeisfly.com www.mylifeisscrewed.com
NeNiTa14 0
haha wow thats y u should have waited to hear the water on and waited 5 mins...lmao
ccclaire_ 0
thats hilarious sometimes my boyfriend and i do that... on purpose nothing to be ashamed of, it's just funnny F no ones' lives!
v1kt4r 13
LMAO, made my day
DameGreyWulf 1
That's why you listen for the shower [facepalm]
Dragonmouth 4
******** instead of showering? Sexy!