Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML
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Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML
Today, I sneaked into my girlfriend's house for some romantic time. Before going into her room, I took a dump in the bathroom. Once I was done, I not only noticed that there was no toilet paper left, but I heard her and her 6'5, heavyweight boxer, ex-marine father, talking outside the bathroom door. FML
Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by quietly undressing and sneaking into the bathroom to join him in the shower. He was bent over taking a dump, pushing his turd down the plughole. FML
Today, I wanted to take a romantic bath with my boyfriend. I set up the candles and hot water, but I had to take a dump. After my business was done, I called him into the bath. He walks in, sniffs, glances at the toilet and leaves. Guess what I forgot to flush. FML
Today, I was peeing in the shower when my girlfriend suddenly pulled open the shower curtain in an attempt to scare me. Startled, I quickly spun around and peed all over her dress. FML
Today, I took a shower at my girlfriend's apartment. I was wandering around, gathering my clothes when I noticed my girl doing her hair in the other room. She looked sort of peculiar, so I stood there, studying her. Half naked. I then realized it wasn't my girlfriend, but her roommate. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided we are ready for the next step in our relationship. Apparently that next step is her taking a dump with the door open. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, my wife dragged me to the bathroom, promising to "show something hot." Not that I was in the mood, but okay. She took off her pants, sat on a toilet, and demanded that I tell her about my day. She wanted me to entertain her while she was taking a dump. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. My mom thinks it's ok to just walk in on someone when they are in there so she decides to take a crap. The worst part is she thought it would be less awkward to talk to me. FML
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Top comments
iljajlm 4
It's this wonderful invention God himself bleesed us with and it's a really complictaed process. The angels named it knocking on the door. You should try it.
KINGMARIO_fml 0
she took a dump in the shower?!?
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Comments (255)
wozer 0
Was the walk in as hot and steamy as you had hoped for?
skatergirl21 2
So you should of ****** her that would of been horny fyl for not doing that
i_luv_cheese 0
dont do anal
tenthredemption 3
if he waited for her to get IN the shower before going inside the bathroom to join & seduce her, presumably she was in the shower whilst taking a poop. ew.
joryuu 0
Yea, **** your life because women shit. It's better when they have eating disorders that prevent the act of defecating. What's up with shower sex anyway? The water washes away all the fun slippery juices. It's like ******* two balloons pushed together. PASS, thanks.
skatergirl21 2
Hahahahah
letitbe56 0
That is incorrect. Taking a dump refers to pooping, not peeing.
murderofcrows 0
Mollyiscute, starchild and the rest of you. I'm rarely on this site yet I always manage to read your stupid comments. If you were witty and made meaningful points you wouldn't be annoying at all. But you don't. So you need to stop. I'm sick of scrolling down and reading your attempts at proving yourself over the comment threads on FML. Today, like everyday, I argued for hours over a gag website. I didn't have anything in the world better to do. FML.
cocoismydog 0
Too soon! (30 Rock)
swodah 0
Oh man! When she's menstruating and she want's to lick you and you haven't noticed - please post to FML again. What you have experienced is life...