Today, I took my four year old son to the playground. When it was time to go, he squirmed out of my arms back to the jungle gym. Not being the type of mother to put up with bad behavior, I swatted his rear and told him we had to go. That's when I realized I'd just spanked the wrong child who was wearing the same coat as my son. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Straight to jail
Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML
Sorry Pat
Today, I went shopping with my two sons and my wife. We got separated after a while, and I spotted my son in the video game section of the store. I snuck up behind him and playfully slapped him on the back of the head. The kid turned around and it wasn't my son. His mom was none to happy. FML
You people are twisted!
Today, I took my son to the playground and watched him have fun. Minutes later, I was being shoved around and called a pedophile because I was there alone with no wife. By the time I convinced them I was innocent, my son was bawling. FML
Short fuse
Today, two days after losing my temper with my smart mouthed 7 year-old son and slapping him across the face, I tried to apologize by buying him a treat and telling him if anyone found out, I would get in trouble. Today, I got a call from social services about the "bruise" on his face. FML
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
Today, I smacked my kid on top of the head for spinning the display rack while I was looking at greeting cards. It wasn't until he dramatically screamed and dropped to the floor wailing that I realized he wasn't my daughter. FML
Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML
Today, while eating with my kids at McDonalds, my son put his hand up and wanted me to give him a "high five." I went to give him a five, but he moved his hand at the last second and I ended up slapping him in the face. Now everyone there thinks I'm a child-beater. FML
Stranger danger!
Today, I took my child to the park. Having been there an hour, another mum came up to me and we started talking. She then told me that one kid had been harassing her children, pointing to my child. When she asked which one was mine I pointed to a random kid. It was hers. FML
Such a rush
Today, at the park, I saw my toddler fall. I rushed over, picked him up, and said, “It’s OK, Mum’s here.” He looked confused. So did his real mum. I had mistakenly grabbed a random child instead of my own in front of everyone. They weren't even wearing similar clothes. FML
Top comments
mersinary12 0
i bet that went done well with the Kids mother.....
DocBastard 40
Forever, you can't compare molestation and spanking. I was spanked as a child, and I'm not brainwashed or scarred. I have a 4 year old, and while I have not spanked her, once she is old enough to know right from wrong, I will if I need to. Corporal punishment will not land you in jail. Beating your child will. But spanking, no. And I like how you used both "their" and "there" incorrectly in the same sentence. That was amusing.
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Comments (142)
Az092_fml 1
Wow that sucks...that was really stuped
IHeart______8D 0
wouldn't you recognize you own son?
dtegrl 0
You obviously don't know how to communicate with your child. It's people like you that raise kids that grow up to hit other people with no remorse. Get a clue moron!
wastingmax 0
all you idiot parents who disagree with spanking obviously litsen to the books written by man i mean seriously you probrably all have some how to be a parent book written by dr phil who is a fail and is retarted. Spank your children i mean cmon when do you ever see a child that is spanked on a nanny show its always the ones who go to "timeout" your all retarted and your kids are prob spoiled brats who are gonna do something stupid and get killed or go to jail cause they have no discipline i cant stand retard ppl who dont understand that timeouts dont work so if i cuss u out ur gonna send me to a timeout for ten minutes that doesnt deter me from not doing it again cause i dont care about being in a timeout but i dont want a whoopin cause it hurt. and you all obviously arent christians cause doesnt the bible say spare the rod. your all a bunch of quacks and your children are gonna give you whats coming to you and i hope they do
LuvRedSox 0
First of all, you should never touch your children in an agressive manner and second, if i were the mother of the child you did spank i would sue you!
KusanagiStyle 3
I got my lashings from my southern grandma when ever I miss behaved. It taught me not to swing back because grandpa is going to join in, and then mom (if she finds out I swung at grandpa too)XD! No really, though, if people are so easily phased by being punished then they need to grow a pair. I wasn't a bully, I don't hit others, I don't even act out--and when I see others acting ridiculous and blame it on their upbringing, I just get annoyed. If you aren't strong enough then just say so. Life is hard, but to really blame your parents for your failure? Just another excuse. I made the choice to not be like them and that's that! Even to this day, I'd pick getting my lashes than getting grounded. The physical wounds go away, but the mental turmoil of being shut off and treated like shit for a week ~ or a month is just wayyy worse.
TheRawrza 0
YDI for hitting your children. It is possible to teach children to behave without hitting them. If you don't have the authority to punish them without physically harming them, then you fail as a parent.
hmarie88 0
beating is abuse, a spat on the bottom isn't. Thts y there r so many hoodlums runnin around! sometimes talking doesnt work.
thasholace 0
you're disgusting I hope that kids mom punched you even if it was your own child hitting it is still a form of child abuse
unhappybitch 8
the kid is lucky he only gets spanked, my mom used to jump me then she made me put my knees in rice until it bleeds lucky kid :(
ranty_nerd 0
Does she have an active case with COS? Cuz she might.