Today, I told my son he couldn't have a toy. He threw a fit, looked me in the eye, and screamed, "Daddy's right! You are a bitch!" The whole store was watching. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
Today, my two year old daughter did not want to leave the toy store, when I picked her up she started screaming at the top of her lungs, "YOU'RE NOT MY DADDY!". FML
Little shit
Today, my son asked for candy at a supermarket checkout. I said no. He laid on the floor and began screaming as if I'd killed his pet rabbit. Other parents nodded at me in silent sympathy, while strangers judged me with their glares. I bought the candy. He still screamed. FML
Today, during a heated argument with my son, I lost my temper and called him a son of a bitch. He enthusiastically agreed. FML
People of Walmart
Today, a bratty kid at Walmart called my mom a "fat bitch" when she wasn't walking fast enough for him. Enraged, I gave him the meanest death glare I could muster and I tore him a new one, right in front of his mother, who then defended her kid, saying that my mom and I should both lose a few pounds. FML
Parent #1 of the Year
Today, I got bitched out by some lady in a Walmart because I looked at her funny while she was on the phone, loudly bragging about "slapping the shit out of" her kids. FML
Today, I smacked my kid on top of the head for spinning the display rack while I was looking at greeting cards. It wasn't until he dramatically screamed and dropped to the floor wailing that I realized he wasn't my daughter. FML
Today, I was in a store when a child looked at me and said to his mother "look at that tall man!" His mother replied "he's an evil giant isn't he, darling?" I then mimed being an evil giant to make the kid laugh. His mother slapped me. FML
Sorry Pat
Today, I went shopping with my two sons and my wife. We got separated after a while, and I spotted my son in the video game section of the store. I snuck up behind him and playfully slapped him on the back of the head. The kid turned around and it wasn't my son. His mom was none to happy. FML
No more bring your kids to work days
Today, I took my 6 year-old to work. A normally docile child, she chased me around with her toy - beating me with it while all my colleagues watched - not stopping despite me requesting her to. When she finally lost said toy, she threw a huge tantrum. Guess who's banned from my office. FML
Top comments
Sammeh_Higgins 0
Kids have gotten so disrespectful.
Moota 9
Someone needs to have a little talk with daddy about name calling?
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Comments (247)
serenitychaos20 6
Learn to control your kid in public! You're the parent, teach the kid some discipline and how to behave in public! God help me if I ever acted that way, my ass would have been whooped.
dhardesty23 8
discipline that little f#%$@
token_blackguy 18
An excellent example of. When it's ok to hit a child.
token_blackguy 18
An excellent example of. When it's ok to hit a child.
toricakes 7
Kids say the darndest things...
Troll_spray 6
darnest* =)
NightForever 2
No...no it's not...#61 was correct. The word is darndest. That was also the title of the TV show.
skyeyez9 25
If I yelled at my mom like that, it would have been followed up with a very hard slap across my mouth.
mattorama 15
YDI if you let an argument happen in his presence which resulted in him learning that, your life definitely sucks if this is what your husband is telling him behind your back!
Troll_spray 6
You live in the same household. How the **** would the child not hear it. By the looks of it the father is a retard that could care less if their son heard them screaming or not. So it's not a YDI, you have poor judging skills.
Troll_spray 6
It's honestly the dads fault. Even if she is a bitch he shouldn't be telling that to his son about his mom. I'm sure he wouldn't like it if she told their child that his dad is a dick, which in this case he obviously is.
Jewdazking23 5
God damn, thats pretty funny
MoZZie_fml 0
fyl? no **** his life for having a bitch mom lmao