Kids: Today, my two year old daughter did not want to leave the toy...

By Herdad - 30/07/2009 11:34 - United States

Today, my two year old daughter did not want to leave the toy store, when I picked her up she started screaming at the top of her lungs, "YOU'RE NOT MY DADDY!". FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 051

You deserved it 3 694

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Daddy's girl

By TooMuchForToLittle - 06/09/2021 11:00

Today, yet again, my 3 year-old daughter came home from a few hours with her father, screams and cries over everything, and when she realizes it won't get her anywhere, screams at me that she hates me and that she wants to go home. I calmly told her she is home, and she screamed, "This is not home!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 373

You deserved it 200

By jessi - 02/12/2011 13:22 - United States

Today, I told my son he couldn't have a toy. He threw a fit, looked me in the eye, and screamed, "Daddy's right! You are a bitch!" The whole store was watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 153

You deserved it 6 675

Mystery man

By LifeSucks - 29/10/2008 11:57 - Canada

Today, as I was taking my three year-old daughter home from daycare, she asked where her daddy was. I tried to tell her that I was her father, but she answered, "No, not you! My other daddy!" I've got some talking to do tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 716

You deserved it 3 982

Stranger danger

By john doe - 07/12/2013 17:29 - United States - Portland

Today, my 6 year-old daughter got mad at me for not buying her yet another expensive doll. I had to pull her away, and she started screaming for help. The next thing I know, another shopper puts me in a chokehold and calls for security, all while my daughter smirks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 059

You deserved it 6 210

By numbnuts - 23/09/2013 05:48 - Canada - Nanaimo

Today, my 2-year-old daughter overheard my wife and I arguing and fixated on one particular insult my wife threw at me. Now my daughter won't stop saying "Daddy a numbnuts", always with a big smile on her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 499

You deserved it 6 062

By Anonymous - 16/12/2010 14:35 - Taiwan

Today, I went to pick up my daughter from preschool. When I got there, I ran to give her a hug. She screamed and ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 469

You deserved it 4 546

By Anonymous - 06/10/2013 04:44 - United States

Today, my 6-year-old daughter threw a tantrum in the middle of a store, all because I wouldn't buy her a pushup bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 472

You deserved it 7 175

Not now!

By Anonymous - 20/09/2009 05:01 - United States

Today, I was in a department store with my three year old daughter to buy some new jeans. I took her into the dressing room with me and as I began to take off my pants she yells, "Mommy, you can't go peepee in here!!" I am no longer welcome in that particular store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 394

You deserved it 3 864

By BaWanda - 30/06/2014 23:39 - United States - San Diego

Today, I smacked my kid on top of the head for spinning the display rack while I was looking at greeting cards. It wasn't until he dramatically screamed and dropped to the floor wailing that I realized he wasn't my daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 548

You deserved it 48 209

By divorced - 07/03/2009 20:15 - United States

Today, I was picking up my daughter from my ex-husband's house and his new girlfriend was there. I said to my daughter that it was time to leave and she clung to his girlfriend and said, "Mommy, I don't want to leave." She wasn't talking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 151 121

You deserved it 10 449

Bathory_fml 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 20:22

Just start screaming "I HAVE NO SON! " at the top of your lungs. That'll shut her up. Probably out of confusion, but still.

dzidziaud 5

Thursday 30 July 2009 20:21

Hahaha, that must have been fun. was your visit to the police station pleasant? :]

Comments

dzidziaud 5

Thursday 30 July 2009 20:21

Hahaha, that must have been fun. was your visit to the police station pleasant? :]

lexilovesyou 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 23:30

This is epiccc(: Lmfao

codaic1549 0

Friday 31 July 2009 1:53

you do realize that this happens all of the time, right?

MastaHorse 0

Saturday 1 August 2009 1:45

that little girl is SMART. that's like the only way for a little kid to get their way.

drcool41 0

Wednesday 16 June 2010 17:24

say ure her uncle

cagj 0

Monday 18 April 2011 15:20

I would have just gone oh sorry your right and walked away and hid behind a cloths rack to watch her reaction

domolovesyoshi 33

Saturday 19 July 2014 7:14

exactly what my parents would've done

Bathory_fml 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 20:22

Just start screaming "I HAVE NO SON! " at the top of your lungs. That'll shut her up. Probably out of confusion, but still.

lloyd1992 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 20:35

umm u said i have no son...and then that'll cheer her up? hmmm

shinyred 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 20:47

Shut her up not cheer her up!

well_this_sucks 0

Friday 31 July 2009 1:44

lmfao

Free_Candy 0

Monday 4 July 2011 0:53

Well it's true there's no mention of a son.

kittycat1597 10

Monday 31 December 2012 21:24

He's saying that she looks like a boy

More_Man 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 20:22

were the police called? O.o what happened?

ROFLsyrup 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 20:24

hah I did the same thing to my mom in the grocery store when I was two... nothing came of it

Finnboghi 0

Friday 31 July 2009 0:36

Nothing came of it because women can't do anything wrong. OP is lucky he didn't get arrested.

Pan22 0

Saturday 1 August 2009 14:57

Reminds me of a video I looked up a while ago. I had to do a project on the "Bystander Effect" for psych class. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIvGIwLcIuw Essentially they "Kidnapped" a young girl screaming "Your not my daddy" in a crowded area.

shyharmonybear 0

Sunday 2 August 2009 12:02

It's really sad to know that people would just glance and keep walking without doing anything to help a child. I would at least call 911 even though probably couldn't physically take a kidnapper on myself.

pandalover69 26

Tuesday 31 August 2010 6:28

women can do bad shit too, women snatch babies and children

22cute 17

Friday 13 April 2012 1:08

Geez so manipulative at two? What a brat!

Imawhalerider 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 20:26

toys are way more important than you

F_IVI_L 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 21:02

Lmao @ #5

Luckster 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 20:28

Time for good old-fashion discipline, the way I received it when I was acting like a little shit. Hope ya have a leather belt!

ledzepfan 0

Saturday 1 August 2009 10:21

@ #6; yeah, leather belt with the father, metal comb from the mother. that's how they used to do it, now-a-days, any more than a slight hit on the wrist is considered child abuse... i don't get it

brit8741 0

Saturday 27 March 2010 20:17

People who beat their kids ruined it for the rest of us.

ZleveL 0

Friday 30 July 2010 7:29

94 I feel ya. my uncle slapped across the face when I got dirt on our tire in front of our white neighbors and they were SOOOOO shocked they just stared. BTW their kids were insane, the purposely ran over their car with their rv then beat it with a hammer. and they graffitied on their own house and LOTS of other crazy shit. all because they never got hit

brown4lifejot 1

Sunday 1 July 2012 3:18

My parents are the abusive type. I personally believe if you don't hit a kid when raising him/her and just be strict in other ways, your kid will turn out much better.

angelina_galvan 3

Friday 10 August 2012 11:44

The belt: scariest thing as a child

tiernang 21

Sunday 20 October 2013 15:22

when i was a kid, my dad would always get out the belt. I was a smart child, and realized after a while, he stopped hitting us and was threatening us. i assume that was when it became a thing you werent supposed to do. So i stood up to him, and you know what i got? Hit.