Today, I told my son he couldn't have a toy. He threw a fit, looked me in the eye, and screamed, "Daddy's right! You are a bitch!" The whole store was watching. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
Today, my two year old daughter did not want to leave the toy store, when I picked her up she started screaming at the top of her lungs, "YOU'RE NOT MY DADDY!". FML
Little shit
Today, my son asked for candy at a supermarket checkout. I said no. He laid on the floor and began screaming as if I'd killed his pet rabbit. Other parents nodded at me in silent sympathy, while strangers judged me with their glares. I bought the candy. He still screamed. FML
Today, during a heated argument with my son, I lost my temper and called him a son of a bitch. He enthusiastically agreed. FML
People of Walmart
Today, a bratty kid at Walmart called my mom a "fat bitch" when she wasn't walking fast enough for him. Enraged, I gave him the meanest death glare I could muster and I tore him a new one, right in front of his mother, who then defended her kid, saying that my mom and I should both lose a few pounds. FML
Parent #1 of the Year
Today, I got bitched out by some lady in a Walmart because I looked at her funny while she was on the phone, loudly bragging about "slapping the shit out of" her kids. FML
Today, I smacked my kid on top of the head for spinning the display rack while I was looking at greeting cards. It wasn't until he dramatically screamed and dropped to the floor wailing that I realized he wasn't my daughter. FML
Today, I was in a store when a child looked at me and said to his mother "look at that tall man!" His mother replied "he's an evil giant isn't he, darling?" I then mimed being an evil giant to make the kid laugh. His mother slapped me. FML
Sorry Pat
Today, I went shopping with my two sons and my wife. We got separated after a while, and I spotted my son in the video game section of the store. I snuck up behind him and playfully slapped him on the back of the head. The kid turned around and it wasn't my son. His mom was none to happy. FML
No more bring your kids to work days
Today, I took my 6 year-old to work. A normally docile child, she chased me around with her toy - beating me with it while all my colleagues watched - not stopping despite me requesting her to. When she finally lost said toy, she threw a huge tantrum. Guess who's banned from my office. FML
Top comments
Sammeh_Higgins 0
Kids have gotten so disrespectful.
Moota 9
Someone needs to have a little talk with daddy about name calling?
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Comments (247)
theonlysweetpea 10
I would have popped his mouth in the store but when we got home, I'd spank him til I got tired then he'll be sitting in the corner facing the wall until dinner then his bath
theonlysweetpea 10
I wonder how old is your kid
sweetari 0
Thats so embarrassing.. I would've left right away and ground him for life and kick the daddys ass..
justrollin 0
Hope you slapped the taste right out his mouth
ce1ine 11
Should have used a condom
KnucklesDeep 5
I hope you gave that little shit a damn good thrashing when you got home.
willow_smithO_o 0
I woulda beat his ass
anddaman 0
welcome to the new generation of kids
paduanim1 0
That's what you get for having a douchebag as a husband, and not teaching your kid manners. Just sayin'.
Okayitwasme 0
Address it right there! Take him to the bathroom and get down so he looks you in the face. Tell him that is not acceptable behavior. He must not act out and this is where he stays with you until he is ready to behave. Even though this was rude he is still a little boy and needs to know his boundaries ! When he says he is ready to shop, Make him apologize! Give him a hug. Carry on and hold your head high, because it was between you and your son! Not the entire store.
katt_is_here 24
This is probably the best advice I've found on this site. Ever.