Today, I texted my boyfriend, and he pretended he was a Burger King employee who found a lost phone, just so that he wouldn't have to talk to me. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my boyfriend came over and dropped off my phone, which I'd left at his place the night before. He immediately left in a sulk. As I looked through my texts, I discovered he was only so moody because I hadn't answered any of his calls or messages. I'm dating an idiot. FML
Today, I found out that when I text my boyfriend, he isn't the one to read them. Instead, he pays his friend to "keep the bitch busy." FML
Today, my boyfriend refuses to talk to me because of a misread text. FML
Today, I pretended to not be able to go out with a friend so I could hang with my boyfriend at the movies. When I sat down, I received a text that said, "Turn around." It was her. FML
Today, I purposely misspelled words while texting my boyfriend so he would think I was out partying and having a life. FML
Today, I was so desperate for someone to talk to I called various restaurants pretending to be interested in ordering food, just so I could have a conversation. I called eleven different places. FML
Today, I sent my boyfriend a sweet text message, since he recently complained that I'm rarely romantic. Instead of being happy, he decided that since it's so out of character for me, I must be cheating on him and must have only sent it out of guilt. FML
Today, I found out that the reason my boyfriend hasn't texted me recently is that he'd forgotten he was dating anyone. FML
Today, I texted my boyfriend of two years and asked if he wanted to go to ball with me. His response was "The person you are trying to message cancelled their phone service and moved to Mexico. Taco taco burrito." I'll take that as a no. FML
Today, my boyfriend texted me saying, "I can come over today. She thinks I've got work." I think he had the wrong number. FML
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Top comments
hotPinklipstick 24
I think it's time to rethink your relationship.
French_Toast_fml 3
He sounds like a whopper of a jerk.
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Comments (142)
crimsonprodigy 15
Did you get a discount?
greatinbed 0
Holy shit your dog is wearing a wig!!!!! Haha thats so funny and cute(:
moosemonkey1000 6
Does anyone else not see a dog wearing a wig?
NyteWolf 7
You sure it wasn't actually a burger king employee and your boyfriend lost his phone? Hope you made sure first before jumping to the conclusion he doesn't want to talk to you
MaydayParadexx 18
Exactly my thought.
ScarletFever67 6
That would be awkward....
KaR1sma 6
Thats messed up... he went to burger king without you. :(
bungee_fml 9
And he's still your boyfriend?
ballbearing 10
Texts are pretty dam easy to just ignore...
Platfoot 0
my comnents always get thumbed down, so why ever bother
tennisrapper1 14
As doc would say: because your comment is stupid.
quite_bored 9
Then why the **** did you waste everyone's time and comment?
zombicidal 11
we can't all be awesome only a select few of us get to be FML famous
EvilLilCupcake 10
Then why even bother putting this comment on here? If you're wanting sympathy, you came to the wrong place dude...
zombiebombatron 6
Mine too. These people are assholes -__-
Sumo69 9
Just try that on my girlfriend she told me I was fired now I got to go beg for my job back
Mackenzie99 6
Then why are u guys together ???
DocBastard 40
Since you texted him, wouldn't it have been much easier for him to simply ignore you and not text you back rather than concoct an elaborate tale about a fast food employee finding a lost phone? It sounds to me like he probably DID lose his phone and you're just an overly suspicious, needy, whiny twit.
cruforlife 5
My thoughts exactly doc
hazleydsweethrt 0
Not if she is the type that texts and calls back to back until she gets a response. I've said some pretty elaborate things just to get a guy to leave me alone for a day. Either way she is needy.
Calyx_fml 22
How do you know it wasn't?