Today, I stepped outdoors for a minute. The wind blew the door shut, locking me outside. I've spent the last two hours pounding frantically on the windows, trying to wake my 4 year old son who is inside. I can see him sleeping soundly on the couch. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my one-year-old son locked me out of the house. I had no spare key and both him and my 4-month-old decided that was the perfect time to scream bloody murder. FML
Today, I was locked out of my house. After hours of trying to break the door, I found out I accidentally left a window open. The door, however, still needs to be replaced. FML
Today, as I stepped out the door and heard it lock behind me, I realized I had forgotten both my keys and my baby inside. There's no other way in. FML
Today, at 7 a.m., I ended up outside in a nightdress, barefoot and in the rain. I've just found out that my two-year-old son now knows how to close the patio door, which of course, has no outside door handle. FML
Today, I snuck out of the house for a night on the town. When I got back, I found all the doors and windows bolted shut. My sister's laughing face at my bedroom window suggests I'll be spending the rest of the night outside. FML
Today, I was taking a nap when my dad texted me, asking me to go check the mail. So I went outside, then the wind blew the front door shut, and it automatically locked. I didn’t have my key. FML
Today, I was in my backyard. When I wanted to come back in the house, I tried to open the sliding door. I knew that my brother locked me out so I banged on the door very hard, causing the glass to break. It turns out that the door wasn't locked. FML
Today, I was home alone and it started to rain. It hadn't rained in days so I went out on my balcony and ran around. I felt great until I realized that my door had been swung shut because of the wind, and it had no handle. I had to wait outside in the rain for two hours. FML
Today, I've managed to lock myself in my own bedroom. It won't open no matter what I do. FML
Today, I was walking home from school and my stupid brother who comes earlier then me locked the storm door. I ended up trying every other door for 3 hours in below freezing temperature. I was numb everywhere. I rang the bell and my brother opened it. He was home the whole time. FML
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Top comments
marinus_fml 20
Go for a walk and smell the roses.You don't need to be inside. Just don't get run over by a goat.
CockRocket 0
He's pretending. Shout through that you've got some money and toys for him. That'll get him to open the door.
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Comments (147)
borkchop1992 15
watch when he burns down your house
allmidnighteyes 11
YDI for not calling a locksmith. If you can chill outside and (most likely) send this from your phone, you can call a locksmith to come unlock your door.
drebunny 0
wow...you seem to be under the mistaken impression that people submit fml's the exact moment something happens to them. In reality, they're probably submitted at least a day or so later, once the problem is resolved
allmidnighteyes 11
"I've spent the last two hours pounding frantically on the windows" Because people who write FMLs after they happen write them as if they were currently happening. Derp.
puddy_fml 0
She also said she can see him sleeping. In the present tense. I agree, call a locksmith.
Yousuck24 21
Like he said, it is used to show the intensity of the problem. It's not like everyone is going to post an FML straight after trying to do something.
MistressKira 0
Exactly what I was thinking. Obviously OP had a phone.. or brought her laptop with her outside because the way she worded it puts her outside still locked out. In simple terms she had her phone with her and could have called the house phone to wake the child up. Or rang a doorbell?!!!?
MistressKira 0
Call the housephone or ring the doorbell? It seems strange a kid wouldn't wake up to POUNDING on a door. It would surely wake me up from a dead sleep.
Pizzamaster 0
my 20 year old friend can't even wake up to a phone call. Little kids sleep like pigs
geeksaresexy 18
also not everyone has a house phone.. I didn't for 3years when I first moved out of my parents
Jrefinne 7
"Moved out of my parents." Haha.
CockRocket 0
Set the house on fire. Smoke the little bugger out of there to open the door.
youFAILatlife228 0
WIN! lmao
itsgabriellee 4
75- You fail at life. Double post.
akginger9 0
the first thing I thought when I read this was that you got on FML as this was happening haha.. nice
esmerita 3
open a packet of chips or cookies really quietly… guarenteed to wake my kids up from 3 streets away
allmidnighteyes 11
Sun Chips. Those bags could wake a hibernating bear from outside the cave.
pronounciations 5
do some doors lock automatically?
CockRocket 0
If its got a latch on it it'll lock automatically unless you lift up the thingy on it.
theUBERcomment 1
Duh, if cars can do it so can doors. somebody missed mechanics classes.
pronounciations 5
I never asked if it was possible, I asked if it was implemented in house doors because I have never seen a door that had done that. Also, 13 year olds don't take mechanics classes.
IMveryHUNGRY 3
Pretty sweet doors-that-lock-after-the-door-shuts you got there..
Mattw2791 0
That's why you should always check the locks