Today, I stepped outdoors for a minute. The wind blew the door shut, locking me outside. I've spent the last two hours pounding frantically on the windows, trying to wake my 4 year old son who is inside. I can see him sleeping soundly on the couch. FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, my one-year-old son locked me out of the house. I had no spare key and both him and my 4-month-old decided that was the perfect time to scream bloody murder. FML
Today, I was locked out of my house. After hours of trying to break the door, I found out I accidentally left a window open. The door, however, still needs to be replaced. FML
Today, as I stepped out the door and heard it lock behind me, I realized I had forgotten both my keys and my baby inside. There's no other way in. FML
Today, at 7 a.m., I ended up outside in a nightdress, barefoot and in the rain. I've just found out that my two-year-old son now knows how to close the patio door, which of course, has no outside door handle. FML
Today, I snuck out of the house for a night on the town. When I got back, I found all the doors and windows bolted shut. My sister's laughing face at my bedroom window suggests I'll be spending the rest of the night outside. FML
Today, I was taking a nap when my dad texted me, asking me to go check the mail. So I went outside, then the wind blew the front door shut, and it automatically locked. I didn’t have my key. FML
Today, I was in my backyard. When I wanted to come back in the house, I tried to open the sliding door. I knew that my brother locked me out so I banged on the door very hard, causing the glass to break. It turns out that the door wasn't locked. FML
Today, I was home alone and it started to rain. It hadn't rained in days so I went out on my balcony and ran around. I felt great until I realized that my door had been swung shut because of the wind, and it had no handle. I had to wait outside in the rain for two hours. FML
Today, I've managed to lock myself in my own bedroom. It won't open no matter what I do. FML
Today, I was walking home from school and my stupid brother who comes earlier then me locked the storm door. I ended up trying every other door for 3 hours in below freezing temperature. I was numb everywhere. I rang the bell and my brother opened it. He was home the whole time. FML
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Top comments
marinus_fml 20
Go for a walk and smell the roses.You don't need to be inside. Just don't get run over by a goat.
CockRocket 0
He's pretending. Shout through that you've got some money and toys for him. That'll get him to open the door.
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Comments (147)
vale_1025 0
this made my day. lmfao.
dansco 25
If you have a phone to post here, why didn't you ring him or someone else?!
fraqtl 1
ydi. who the heck doesn't have a spare key outside?
ChibiChibi_fml 28
People who don't wish to make it easy for others to break into their house. Any smart thief checks 1. above the door frame 2. Under any large rocks or loose stepping stones 3. For a hid-a-key rock/turtle/etc 4. Under the mat and 5. When applicable in the knotholes of trees, just to avoid actually having to do the breaking part of breaking an entering. They will check those places and any other reasonable looking hiding spots the same way a car thief will check for the magnetic hide-a-key holders in the wheel wells and such. If the thief is someone from the neighborhood they could just as easily have watched while the spare key was being hidden.
EphicPhayl_fml 0
why did you lock your door after you opened it?
pharmbrooke35 0
you could wait for him to wake up than get his attention! let the poor kid sleep it's not his fault you locked yourself out!
bailey3612 0
Soooo dont take the time to post this!! Get the hell in tht house!!
cc88 3
If you Can post this fml, didnt you have a phone ? To maybe call inside or someone else ??
ChibiChibi_fml 28
Firstly, the fact that they posted an FML is proof of nothing. They could have posted it anytime after they got back inside the house. Secondly, even if they did post from outside that doesn't mean they have an actual phone. They could have an iPod/iPad/ Random tablet with the FML app. If it was any of those they might not have the data required to use any of the Apps that give phone like ability.
Its_Shay 10
@79 my house's door is the exact opposite of what you described
Mabonga 12
soundproof homes are the best for the little ones
crazy_loner 25
And yet, you are posting an fml while you should be thinking about a way to get inside.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
All FMLs must start with Today. So they more than likely posted this after they got back into their home but in order for the wording to flow wrote in present tense.