Today, I saw a pregnant woman fall off her moped. As I helped her back up, I asked if her baby was okay. I was then blindsided by her brick of a purse while she screeched, "I'm not pregnant!" FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I saw a woman who I thought was pregnant on the bus. Trying to be nice, I offered her my seat and congratulated her. She wasn't pregnant, just holding a large bag of groceries. The entire bus heard me and the death glare she gave could’ve turned me to stone. FML
Today, I’m 9 months pregnant. I was in a grocery store when this little hellspawn came tearing ass down the aisle right at me. I instinctively turned to the side to protect my belly, while the brat crashed into my hip and fell backward. His cunt of a mother cussed me out for knocking down her “baby”. FML
Today, my pregnant wife and I got separated while out shopping. She ended up having meltdown and crying so hard the manager had to call me over the PA. FML
Today, as I was just finishing my grocery shopping, a little girl and her mother walked past. Seeing the little girl staring at me, I waved. The girl then pointed to me and asked her mother "Mommy, is that man pregnant?" FML
Today, I was carrying some bags out of a store, and my shirt had scooted up a little. I had no free hands, so I ignored it. A woman stopped me to tell me that bare midriffs are only attractive on skinny girls, "not fat ones." I'm 6 months pregnant. FML
Today, a pregnant woman asked me to give her a demonstration on how to push when having a baby. I agreed and pushed, but I may have pushed a little too hard because I shat myself. The pregnant woman laughed and said she was hoping that would happen. FML
Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML
Today, I was riding my bike to work in a hurry and hit a pothole. I flew off and hit the ground hard. I was badly shaken, but an old lady came over, checked me out and helped me to my feet. After she left the scene, I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet while "helping" me. FML
Today, I saw a drunk woman drop her purse in the street. I picked it up and went to give it to her, only for her to scream at me for being a thief. Then she started crying, apologized and hugged me, then got angry again, and finally threw up on me. FML
Today, my mother asked a woman at the clothing store we go to all the time when her baby was due. Turns out the woman isn't pregnant. FML
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Top comments
sammiller4 3
never assume a woman is pregnant unless its extremely obvious
perdix 31
If you were a plumpa humpa, you could have said, "I'd be happy to get you there, ma'am."
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Comments (273)
schramm 0
if she's that fat maybe next time she falls off she should roll to were ever she's going
Person1233 13
I'm sorry about that.
awesomesauce8 0
hehehe moped. fat people make me giggle.
scardoza 0
YDI for askin her instead of just sayin YOU OKAY dumb ass
Haha_Owned3 6
says the justin bieber fan....
auntiemomma 0
y'all r a bunch if *******
supaman1 0
wtf?! how would she automatically know whether he baby was ok or not u dumbass
JABabY 0
Haha 2 funny lol
KBruce317 0
Maybe the lady landed on her stomach or something, so he asked if the baby was okay. I have a friend who has that weird pouch of fat just on her stomach - her arms and legs are skinny, but her stomach is big. One time I was with her and my friend that was 7 months pregnant and a guy asked when both their babies were due... it was kind of awkward because their stomachs looked exactly the same but one wasn't pregnant... But she didn't yell at the guy or beat his face with purse.
carly426 0
never do that
HappyPickles 11
Wow - what a cow. The woman definitely has problems - blaming a problem on other people that only she has control over.