Intimacy, Awkward and Wanker: Wanker

Wanker

By oops - 09/02/2009 05:12 - United States

Today, I can't decide what's worse, my mom walking in on me doing the five knuckle shuffle, or the one hour talk the next day about how it's perfectly normal and even she does it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 384

You deserved it 8 861

Intimacy Awkward Wanker

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By lobotomy pls - 11/09/2015 18:40 - United States - Tappahannock

Today, I walked in on my mom, legs spread and changing her tampon, all while she was carrying on a conversation on the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 383

You deserved it 4 510

By blahblah493 - 26/05/2011 04:15 - United States

Today, I walked in on my mom trying to wax her butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 070

You deserved it 6 633

By me - 08/06/2012 14:00 - United States - Carthage

Today, I was taking a shower. My mom thinks it's ok to just walk in on someone when they are in there so she decides to take a crap. The worst part is she thought it would be less awkward to talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 454

You deserved it 2 702

By SCARRED - 29/08/2014 20:15 - United States - Kansas City

Today, I walked in on my dad giving my mom a striptease. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 756

You deserved it 7 582

By Anonymous - 14/09/2012 05:28 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I walked in on my mother rubbing one out. For the third time. I then had to explain to her, also for the third time, why pleasuring herself in the living room is inappropriate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 065

You deserved it 2 784

By Isabell - 06/02/2010 05:31 - Australia

Today, my soon-to-be mother-in-law walked in on me masturbating, in my own house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 727

You deserved it 5 859

By stillhave2years - 22/05/2013 10:56 - United States

Today, for the fourth time this week, I witnessed my mother dancing around the house naked. Apparently, she is loosening up her "inner nudist" and isn't planning on stopping any time soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 305

You deserved it 3 674

By ShadowJack - 29/04/2012 15:10 - United States

Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 441

You deserved it 9 759

By Nola - 27/04/2017 12:00

Today, I watched my mother pull her pants down and, using her hands, feel her butt crack to check if she'd had had an accident. She then pulled her pants up, went into the kitchen and touched stuff in the refrigerator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 252

You deserved it 331

Late reaction

By fuck - 22/01/2020 14:00 - Canada - Airdrie

Today, I was masturbating in my bedroom, when suddenly, my mom opened the door and walked in with guests. I didn't react quick enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 308

You deserved it 656

FML_x2 0

Wednesday 15 April 2009 23:09

Your mom does the five knuckle shuffle too? O_o

xsydbabyx 0

Monday 23 March 2009 23:00

Sicko?! What the hell? Whas wrong with masturbating? Oh yea but seriously, lock the door.

Comments

xXxRandiexXx 0

Monday 9 February 2009 9:47

thats just horrible

22cute 17

Tuesday 21 February 2012 23:53

The TALK is definitely worse.

TryToBeKind 0

Monday 9 February 2009 14:55

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

DriDri_fml 0

Saturday 29 May 2010 1:43

seven year old?? what the ****! the kids balls haven't even dropped! that shit's not okkey!? and giving tips to the kid, definately not okkey!

Justforlolz 14

Wednesday 23 June 2010 3:22

#42- Epic Win!!! I LOLed so hard when I read that. I agree though. He's not old enough to have his Whack-A-Thon yet.

lizamaphone 6

Tuesday 3 May 2011 18:36

fail, 42. kids start doing it when they're pretty little... and they just know it feels good, they don't know what it means.

Feklfekl2222 32

Sunday 30 October 2011 2:10

I started feeling down there when I was 6 because I knew it felt kind of nice

PoeSlayer 0

Tuesday 29 November 2011 3:25

Seriously it's normal and healthy for kids to do that. Ask any proffessional. Know your stuff next time.

Haelous 0

Monday 9 February 2009 18:00

Deserved. Always lock the door. If you don't have a lock, buy one!

relief_fml 0

Tuesday 10 February 2009 22:20

LOL fornication. p.s. are you from USM?

lexbabes13 0

Wednesday 11 February 2009 17:42

wtf

thewelshmetal 0

Monday 16 February 2009 20:32

Should of showed her what your little swimmers looked like.

littlepirate_fml 0

Saturday 28 February 2009 14:38

Poor you....

cmonbru 0

Wednesday 1 September 2010 6:43

loool ur so ugly

lwd305 0

Wednesday 24 November 2010 1:34

49, your such a queer.

abbottizer 0

Monday 2 March 2009 9:40

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

LissaMccracken 23

Saturday 14 December 2013 1:11

Everyone does it, and if you say you don't, you're lying

brommwpryl 9

Wednesday 19 August 2015 19:58

Even... babies!?

Spacecatsattack 5

Wednesday 23 March 2016 3:33

Maaaaybe I'm going out on a limb here, buuut I'm pretty sure that was sarcasm. If so, well played.

RPM_fml 0

Friday 6 March 2009 13:53

Joe?

RacinJason 0

Friday 6 March 2009 21:38

Ryan? I bet this chick is Canadians, i hear they are all compulsive masterbators.

Keywords

Coworkers Death Work Politics Mental health Technology Transportation Cars Social Media Parents Video games Sex Gamers Poopoo peepee Awkward Kids Animals Cats Weird Snow Bosses Friends Painful Accident Sports Geek Embarrassing Students Music Party

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I agree, your life sucks 89 511

You deserved it 6 335

Wanker

Same thing different taste

Late reaction

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