Today, I saw a man on my bike that was stolen a few years ago. I asked him if I could have my bike back just wondering what he'd say. He calmly replied, "Hell no, I stole this fair and square." FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I saw a bike locked to a short bollard, making it very easy to steal. Being as nice as I am, I stayed, hoping the owner would come soon and no one else would take it. Then the guy who bullied me in highschool showed up, asked me what I was doing, laughed at me, took the bike, and left. FML
Today, my bike was stolen. These things happen, so I went to work. On my walk to work, a girl pulls up on my bike and says I needed to fix the brakes, someone could kill themselves. She hands the bike to me and runs off. Not even 3 minutes pass before police surrounded me and accused me of stealing my own bike. FML
Today, I was walking to the store when I ran into one of my friends. He said he heard about my bike being stolen the day before, and that whoever took it was a heartless dick. I hadn't told anyone about the theft. FML
Today, I found my bike that was stolen a week ago in front of someone's house. Now this wouldn't have been a problem if my husband didn't steal it to go meet with his girlfriend. FML
Today, my 3 year old son's tricycle was stolen. I looked up the street and saw a neighbour's kid riding it. I marched up, gently lifted him off it, gave him a stern lecture about stealing and brought the tricycle back home. The cops then showed up. Apparently, the kid has an identical tricycle. FML
Today, I saw my bike locked outside a Starbucks down the street from my house. It was stolen about 10 days ago from my communal laundry room. There was even a cop parked across the street, but I have no proof to show that bike even belonged to me. FML
Today, I saw my bike locked outside a Starbucks down the street from my house. It was stolen about 10 days ago from my communal laundry room. There was even a cop parked across the street, but I have no proof to show that bike even belonged to me. FML
Today, I was at Goodwill and I saw my bike, which was stolen from me a couple of weeks ago. It was a gift that my mom gave me for my birthday. The bike was being sold for 65 dollars. I had to buy it. FML
Today, I walked outside to this guy attempting to steal my bike. When I asked him what he was doing he calmly replied, "I'm a bike inspector. You hooked your chain all wrong! This time is a warning; next time it'll be a ticket!" He then threw his full, opened Pepsi can at me. FML
Today, I was walking home from work going over a railway-bridge, when a 12 year old boy standing at the bottom asks if I could help him carry his bike up, as he couldn't lift it. I did it for him, and was greeted on the other side by his father - who thought I was stealing it and hit me. FML
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Top comments
kozzard 17
If you can prove it was your bike, the police can get it returned to you.
Ambient25 24
That should have been the part where you either popped the tires or threw him off the bike and pedaled like crazy
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Comments (107)
DocBastard 38
Somehow I don't think "Finders keepers" will hold up in court.
vencku 13
Actually it would. If it's found, then the item will become yours after a some time if no one claims it back during that period. You can even play that game with a house. It does take ten years to become yours and there are a few conditions, but still.
DocBastard 38
Yes, thank you for completely destroying a joke.
Mossears133 15
I believe you're thinking of Squatters' Rights, and that's only if the house is unowned/bank owned.
Goober244 12
You must be fun at parties 57
vencku 13
Touchy people, aren't you? Moss, I'm not talking about squatter's rights. If you openly live in house for a decade here and it is not contested by the owner, then you eventually own it. The principle is that he who uses something must be the owner. (Obviously not if you have a renting contract.)
MacMonster 10
#68, so if take a gold pen from someone at school and use it only at home, it's rightfully mine?
YeahYeahYeahOK 6
That really sucks. Especially since my GFs bike was stolen yesterday. It was a Schwinn Signature series worth about 550 bux new, and it was practically new...
Lil_Red777 21
Sounds like you could write your own FML XD
motorboatingboy 4
Or a FHL (**** her Life)
JoshuahColins 19
Well... Kick his ass
websphere69 27
I guess while you're sitting in jail you at least have the satisfaction on knowing it was a beating well deserved.., At least if you can prove it was your bike the cops can get it back for you, but as for pressing charges on the thief, probably only if he's dumb enough to admit to the cops he stole it in the first place.
brittyboo123 35
Should have followed him and stole it back "fair and square."
worldclassrager 39
Well now it's proven it's yours...steal it back if you can...
thatnucca 36
Time to play hide and fetch OP if you want to be crafty or simply call the cops...
Cazz91 21
I salute you OP for having the courage to confront your thief and have nothing worse happen to you other than your criminals exchange of polite words. I really do believe it could have turned out horrible if that jerk decided to do more than just tell you his thoughts.
BimmerDriver 23
I give you props for confronting him. Most people that post FMLs about stolen objects don't have the courage to confront the theif.
D3ATHZ3RO 15
He admitted to stealing, take him to court!