By not a dick-man - 12/08/2014 17:05 - Canada - Victoria

Spicy
Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML
I agree, your life sucks 48 661
You deserved it 31 470

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Top comments

He probably thinks you're a dick now.

Why was his dick hanging out?

Comments

He probably thinks you're a dick now.

Kyle1dc 17

You've got balls to do such a dick move like that to your friend.

I can't help but wonder why OP had to ask. I'm sure he could've guessed by the general location the bulge was in...

Besides, it's not like it's any of OP's business what's in someone's pockets. I would have just assumed it was either their junk or their phone.

I think with Mike's username, whatever was in the friends pocket really wasn't a dick.

why was his first reaction to poke it?

He probably thinks you like dick now.

Kyle1dc 17

#54 Probably a brainfart of dickish proportions.

Why were you looking there OP?

StiffPvtParts 43

Correction: He probably now thinks Mike (OP) is gay c: (Just to be clear, there's nothing wrong with being gay)

Why was his dick hanging out?

Gotta rock out with your cock out. What are you, a Mike?

19 was that a Jake and Amir reference?

Or maybe he has a large one or was wearing really tight pants.

Fr0gs 15

Reminds me of the utube video with the police officer patting down the black guy haha

That's nice, 3.

If you're going to spell something, spell it the way you see it. * YouTube.

That's no longer a stereotype. They do have big ones lol.

Biggest one in the world is a white dude. And that is natural without taking something to make it bigger.

Thank the gods u didn't jerk it or pull it out

also good that he didn't hit it or smack it... there could've been trouble..

Also good he didn't bop it or twist it.

newnightsky 5

or bite it and fist it no?... ok

best comment. actually made me laugh

A ballsy move on your part, but your coworker was a little testy.

It was just a simple mistake, no need for his friend to be a dick about it.

Kyle1dc 17

Insert penis joke... oh wait a moment...

that was his friend not coworker

I would post a penis joke but it is too long ;)

I can't stop laughing.... You sir are clever xD

the understatement of the century...

Why would you poke anything f you didn't know exactly what it was? I mean, you can point out what it is by, well, pointing, but don't poke it.

Animekid126 13

Because sometimes people touch things, he's not thinking of all these precautions throughout the day

That's redickulous.

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

#50 Well, you really cocked that up...

@50 can you say pun, read the comment again

inner_peace 19

That pun flew right over his head

RedPillSucks 31

The head shot

My phone actually autocorrected that... It was supposed to be ridickulous. I got the pun. It was the "re" part I was correcting.

magnetic_aura 26

That doesn't make sense for your post...

Ohhhh, so awkward. Insert foot in mouth.

I'd like some tomato sauce with that foot please.

let's hope the only thing inserted into a mouth here was a foot....

RedPillSucks 31

I don't think it's a foot the guy's thinking of inserting.

RusticChick 27

I'd say that's one awkward moment you'd look back on and laugh about.. or bury very deep and never bring up again. Either way, I got a good laugh from this!